HOW do you hs w/o dh's approval?

[brennan]

Dd is VERY young still, but I guess is only 1 year away from preschool starting age. Dh is against homeschooling. He remembers lots of fun times he had with his friends, goofing off and having fun, passing notes, causing trouble and he doesn't really care about the education part, but THAT is what school is about . He says that all homeschooled kids never fit in, and weren't "weird" but they had no friends . This has not been my experience with hs'd kids. When I talk about hs, I talk about the educational part and not as much about the social "good times" to be had as a result of going through something together. So thus we have been having a REALLY hard time talking about it as we are arguing 2 different things!

Honestly I do NOT think that I can put dd in school. Her personality I don't think would do well and she is very smart and I feel very strongly that I can do better at home.

So how do you go about actually homeschooling without dh's "blessing"?

[eclipse]

Maybe, since his concerns are social, you can address his concerns about socialization and developing friendships?

[Callimom]

Originally Posted by brennan

Dd is VERY young still, but I guess is only 1 year away from preschool starting age. Dh is against homeschooling. He remembers lots of fun times he had with his friends, goofing off and having fun, passing notes, causing trouble and he doesn't really care about the education part, but THAT is what school is about . He says that all homeschooled kids never fit in, and weren't "weird" but they had no friends . This has not been my experience with hs'd kids. When I talk about hs, I talk about the educational part and not as much about the social "good times" to be had as a result of going through something together. So thus we have been having a REALLY hard time talking about it as we are arguing 2 different things!

Honestly I do NOT think that I can put dd in school. Her personality I don't think would do well and she is very smart and I feel very strongly that I can do better at home.

So how do you go about actually homeschooling without dh's "blessing"?

I think the thing to do is work towards some concensus. IMO putting power struggles over your kid into your marriage is never good for anyone. First I'd listen to him. Make time to focus on what he is saying and address/acknowledge his concerns as best you can. Talking past him about the educational aspect won't resolve the issue.

Another strategy is to become a member of your local homeschool group(s) and find some "not weird" families to introduce to your DH. Let him see how much fun homeschooling can be - lots of events, classes, programs, co-ops etc.

Family Matters by David Guterson is excellent for convincing dads of some of the benefits of homeschooling.
And there are lots of threads on here about working towards getting DH's support. Lillian has them all linked. I am sure she'll pop in.

[moominmamma]

You've got loads of time. You might have to put your kid in a play-based preschool a couple of mornings a week for a year or two while he comes around, but that's not the end of the world, IMO. My dh would never have considered homeschooling in a million years when my eldest was a toddler. By the time she was school-age he had seen with his own eyes how life without school could include all those crazy fun social opportunities -- and more! While your dd is still a preschooler, join a homeschool support group and nurture some inter-family friendships with other homeschoolers. Nurture your dd's interest in activities that aren't restricted to school -- and might even be hampered by it.

By age 5, even though she'd gone to preschool part-time for a little more than a year, my dd had developed a whole bunch of social contacts with a wide age-range of homeschooled kids, had become deeply committed to learning music, was creative and active in the community, attended classes and field trips and playdates and so on. It was easy for my dh see the value in these things. Until then he had focused on what she'd miss out on by going to school. Once she was doing all those things, the tables were turned; instead his attention was put onto what she'd have to give up in order to go to school. That's what really spurred my dh to accept homeschooling.

Miranda