My husband doesn't understand my addiction to sweets.

[2timestrouble]

Hi all,
I am having small fights with my husband because he doesn't seem to believe me or take me seriously about my addiction to candy.
Is not like we have fights or anything like that, we have a great marriage and he is a very, very good man.
But I do have a problem and he seem to think is funny or cute but is not.
I mean, it may have start funny and we joke about it but some how it kept growing and now I can't stop.
I notice it became a problem when I was staring liying to him and to myself so I could eat.
I keep making excuses and just can stop.
-Tomorrow I will stop
-I have a bad day so I deserve something good
-1 candy is not big deal
-If I already eat one 2 is not big difference
-People should love me for who I am not what I look
-I can stop eating it but is the only bad thing I do (I don't smoke, no drink, no drugs)

I am not big, I am 5' and weight about 120 pounds, with close I may even look good, but when I take my close I am a skiny fat, I have many cellulite and I have no muscle mass. I use to be very into fitness and go to the gym often, eat very healthy, etc.
When got pregnant I wanted to enjoy to the max my pregnancy and I stop working out and I ate what ever I wanted, this is my last baby (I have 2) and I wanted to have a very nice spoil pregnancy.
But after baby born I couldn't brake the bad habits.

My husband doesn't get me, he knows I don't feel good about my body but he doesn't get it why I can't say no, or why I even care since I am not big, or why I ask him for it and get mad when he brings me the stuff.
I have explain him many times that I lie to him the same way I lie to myself when I want candy but I always feel worst after eating the stuff.

Today for example he bring me cookies, I ate 7!! He said they are diet, but they are still not good, specially at night, he said he does it because he knows it makes me happy, I explain that makes me happy while I eat them but I feel worst when I finish.

Why adictions to food doesn't have as much impact as addictions to drugs? I ask him, would you try to stop me? But I understand is not as impact not as bad to see me eating a whole bag of cookies then using drugs, but this is still some things that still hurt me emotional.

Do anybody have being through something like this?
Thanks for reading

[pacificbliss]

Hi Yovi,

Are you still nursing? I crave sweets when I am breastfeeding, way more than when i was pregnant. I have some thoughts for you though. At 5' 120 lbs you are still in the normal/healthy weight category. That said I understand your concerns. Cellulite happens even to super skinny people. Don't beat your self up. It sounds like maybe you just need to tone up a bit? Maybe do weights to add muscle mass and some cardio for your heart? I don't realy feel like you need to give up sweets entirely. Just balance it with more sensible foods, choose your sweets wisely and get some exercise so you feel good about you.

[2timestrouble]

Originally Posted by pacificbliss

Hi Yovi,

Are you still nursing? I crave sweets when I am breastfeeding, way more than when i was pregnant. I have some thoughts for you though. At 5' 120 lbs you are still in the normal/healthy weight category. That said I understand your concerns. Cellulite happens even to super skinny people. Don't beat your self up. It sounds like maybe you just need to tone up a bit? Maybe do weights to add muscle mass and some cardio for your heart? I don't realy feel like you need to give up sweets entirely. Just balance it with more sensible foods, choose your sweets wisely and get some exercise so you feel good about you.

Nope, I haven't breastfeed in over a year. You are right, I don't thin I have to lose weight is just that the weight I have is all made of flab skin, I am like the little dough guy... what is its name? Phsomething.
I eat pretty much healthy, mostly because my kids we always eat veggies and fruits, some fish and lots of chicken, brown rice and quinoa.
But I just can't go through the day without candy, I actually have headaches when I have try to cut down my intake of sugar.

[sapphire_chan]

Have you tried having sweet fruits? For instance, dates and raisins are SUPER sweet.

[Maiasaura]

You weren't really clear on what is bothering you. I see 3 things going on here.
Is it more that your DH doesn't seem to respect your feelings about it, or more that you don't like your body, or more that you hate your addiction and want to stop it somehow? Or all of that?

Maybe you can keep your DH out of the whole equation? Tell him you are going to take care of your own sweets. If you want them, you will get them yourself. Would that work?
Also apparently this is bothering you emotionally somehow. I wonder how else you can get your needs met besides food.

I also am addicted to sugar, but I am an alcoholic who has many sober years. I know that it's the same addiction (for me) only manifesting in a different substance. I have lots of weight I could take off. I used to be your size, when I was a drinking woman. I could take off some 55lbs, probably.

I should take my own advice

mama.

[2timestrouble]

Originally Posted by Maiasaura

You weren't really clear on what is bothering you. I see 3 things going on here.
Is it more that your DH doesn't seem to respect your feelings about it, or more that you don't like your body, or more that you hate your addiction and want to stop it somehow? Or all of that?

When my husband and I married he was this very cute chubby geeky men with a huge heart but he dresses awful and had risk for diabetes. Me on the other side I was in my best moment. I was the pretty fashionable, he was the smart.
When we got married I put him in a diet, I teach him how to dress and he help me to go back to school. We were a great team.
I even became kind of geeky myself after all these years married.
But when I got pregnant I let go and got very addicted to sweets.
I am mad at myself the most for not be able to control my self, to let me get till this point.
I am mad at him because he doesn't seem to understand how much this hurt me, he keep telling me he loves me no matter how I look, and I love him for that but there are things that I need to do for me, and my body slef-esteem is one of those, he may be happy with my extra pound but I am not.
I am upset because he doesn't help me the way I help him, he is always putting the example that when he ask for sweets and I say no he said ok, but for me is not that easy and he knows that.
You are right, this may have to do with other deeper feelings like not feeling even in our relationship. I have try to go back to school again (I stop when I got pregnant) but this time around I am doing REALLY bad, which makes me feel more aware of my body because I least before I felt pretty, no I don't feel pretty and I feel bad about school.
I think I may feel also jealouse of him, since he lost weight and dress better, we got better jobs, he is self-esteem is very high. he just came back to school too and he is doing great.
I keep telling me if only I could get one thing right I will get my self-esteem back, but if I can't even stop eating candy how I am going to do other things more difficult like collage.
Perhaps I am wrong.

[rootzdawta]

Moved from Fitness and Weight Management to Parents as Partners.

[lolar2]

The OP has 59 posts and only recently joined. Will she be able to see the thread now that it is moved?

[~PurityLake~]

Oftentimes people crave sweets when their diet is deficient in protein. I know many people with a sweet craving who lost the craving when they made sure to include at least 40 grams of protein in breakfast and lunch.

[karika]

Our bodies have yeast and bacteria living in a balance. If the balance is upset, sugar craving is a major symptom. Yeast live on sugar. Did you take antibiotics at some point between being the pretty fashionable and feeling you became addicted to sweets? Antibiotics would throw off your bodies natural flora. Try taking 5 drops of GSE (grapefruit seed extract) in a shot of OJ 2 or 3 times a day, take a good probiotic, and biotin for 2 weeks. Then just keep taking the probiotic daily.

Another factor is the chemicals in the sweets. I believe they have addictive qualities like drugs. I was addicted to candy all my life until recently. Once I found out that all HFCS (high fructose corn syrup) is from genetically modified corn (which is experimental and has been shown dangerous for mammal and insects and plants... basically all life.). I think there is an addictive quality in HFCS and possibly the food colorings too. I used to love the soft cherry twizzlers and so many other things... my mouth is watering thinking of them now. But I will not consume them again. It is a dangerous poison IMO in the candies.

What I have done is to make more homemade snacks. I make marzipan (without the food colorings), cookies, muffins, melt chocolate (Enjoy Life allergy free chocolate chips with a bit of So Delicious coconut milk to thin it some) to dip strawberries in. I do buy Sharkies ( http://www.sharkiesinc.com/Why-sharkies_1 ) at the HFS, and lollipops like the ones on this site http://www.naturalcandystore.com/ . I know I still have a yeast imbalance. Last year I stopped eating all HFCS, including my caffeine free soda I loved, went GFCFSF recently, and now am moving to vegan, so I am still eating sugar for now. It will be the last addiction I break probably.....

Just adding my thoughts here I guess. I like sugar still too. And when I make my peanut butter chocolate chip cookies, I eat a lot more than 7, lol... I eat 12.... I also am 120 lbs at 5'4", but was 100 prepregnancy...

[2timestrouble]

Originally Posted by lolar2

The OP has 59 posts and only recently joined. Will she be able to see the thread now that it is moved?

Hi, thanks for worry, I actually didn't knew what happen until today a nice lady told me what happen and send me a link to here.
All these days I thought I did something wrong or that I was to pity.

[2timestrouble]

Originally Posted by ~Purity♥Lake~

Oftentimes people crave sweets when their diet is deficient in protein. I know many people with a sweet craving who lost the craving when they made sure to include at least 40 grams of protein in breakfast and lunch.

I know I have protein for diner always but honestly I have never really count how much and I my breakfast are almost all carbohydrate but I always drink milk, I actually drink at least 2 bowls of cereal per day, and sometimes a glass of milk too (for the cookies ) but maybe that is not enough protein?

[2timestrouble]

Originally Posted by karika

Our bodies have yeast and bacteria living in a balance. If the balance is upset, sugar craving is a major symptom. Yeast live on sugar. Did you take antibiotics at some point between being the pretty fashionable and feeling you became addicted to sweets?

Another factor is the chemicals in the sweets. I believe they have addictive qualities like drugs. I was addicted to candy all my life until recently. Once I found out that all HFCS (high fructose corn syrup) is from genetically modified corn (which is experimental and has been shown dangerous for mammal and insects and plants... basically all life.). I think there is an addictive quality in HFCS and possibly the food colorings too.

I don't remember taking antibiotics, but I do have had many headaches for the past months, and I mean bad headaches and at least one a week.
maybe is not just me no able stopping but really something on inside my body.
Oh and btw thanks for the link to the sharkis, they sound good, do they taste good? I google Marzipan to see a picture and it come out as a tiny babies, lol. If marzipan is what I think is (in Mexico we have a candy Mazapan) I love, love, love those! How you make your own?