Whiny toddler

[sgmom]

Does anyone have any tips on how to shut a toddler up? She'll be 2 next month.

And please don't tell me that this is just a phase and that it's normal behavior. I know that she will stop eventually, but it's been going on for almost a year now, and it's DRIVING ME CRAZY.

And it's not just the whining. It's the repetitive sound. WAAAAAAAAAA HA HA. *pause* AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH HA HA. *pause, repeat*. All. Day. Long.

Or if it's not that, it's aaaaaaaahhhhhHHHHHHHHhhhhhaaaaaaa. *repeat*

We've been calling her siren because she sounds like a stinkin' fire truck.

Suggestions? She says words, but is still fairly non verbal.

[Ruthla]

Kids don't automatically learn how to talk in appropriate tones of voice; it's something they need to be taught.

It sounds like there are two separate issues here: number one is teaching your child that some kinds of noises bother you, and number two is teacher her how to ask appropriately.

You can keep on telling her "I don't understand when you talk like that. Use real words." Obviously, at this age you'll be happy with "cookie" instead of "Mommy, may I please have a cookie?"- but you need to use positive reinforcement every time she uses a real word in a reasonable tone of voice.

Also tell her "when you talk like that, it hurts my ears." If you don't tell her the noise bothers you, how will she know?

You also might want to get her hearing evaluated. None of my kids had "whiny/screaming" stages that lasted more than a couple of months, and all were pretty much verbal by age 2. If this has been going on for a year, then the noises she's making might be an imitation of what she's actually hearing around her. Of course, all kids are different and this could be totally normal for her, but it can't hurt to get it checked out.

[Laur318]

whoa, i read that and didnt even think of getting her hearing check. good call!

for now, i just hope you can find some time to relax and hear nothing. no sounds at all. maybe if she sleeps in the car turn off the radio. not TVs. hear some silence so you can chill out.

i hope somebody has answers for you. my kid drives me crazy when he wants attention like that but it's always at the worst times!

[sgmom]

Her hearing's fine. We did have it checked, but the whine is more of a "I'm bored", or "I need attention" type of whine. It's just a noise that she seems to like to make when there's nothing for her to do, or when she doesn't want to do what I offer (toys, coloring, etc).

I'm just getting tired of getting down to her level with my hands over my ears to say "Owie! That sound hurts my ears. What do you need?" She'll always tell me what she wants, and it's almost always "up", or if it's not up, she'll make the noise again and sometimes laugh.

Her latest thing is running either in circles (or up and down the hallway) making these "siren" noises, or standing on a chair and just wailing like a fire truck. It definitely seems to be a boredom or attention seeking behavior.

I've tried mocking her (in a playful way) and that helps a lot (gets her laughing), but it just seems never ending. If she would NAP so I COULD have quiet time, life would be lovely. And it doesn't help that I have a 10 week old as well. LOL

*sigh*

[namaste_mom]

If I whine back to my kids they either think it is annoying and stop whining or they think it is funny and start laughing. I do it to my 21 month old and she thinks it funny.

[MrsH]

Whining can be so grating! I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time with that, I imagine having a 10 week old makes it even harder.

Is there anything that your DD does before she makes the "siren" sound? Since you mentioned that she seems to use it as a way to get attention, perhaps she's sending you signals before the sound, that you could respond to and thus prevent the noise at least some of the time. I realized with my middle one that when he starts to drive me crazy by picking stuff apart, he's totally bored and has actually sent me a couple of signals already. It took a while to realize, and then a while longer to learn how/when to respond to them, but it did help him to learn. When I saw the sign (him lying down amidst his toys) I'd say "oh, it looks like you're done playing with those blocks/trains/cars/balls. Let's clean them up together and then we'll read a story/do a puzzle/find something else to do." That little bit of attention really helped him and 10-15 minutes later he could usually play alone again.

I know you won't always have 10-15 minutes to give, but perhaps once in a while you might. He now tells me when he's starting to feel bored, rather than taking stuff apart (sometimes, anyway)