Week 2 & We're Lost!

[VisionaryMom]

So we're in Week 2 of homeschooling, basically because we started with the local public schools. I think that was a mistake. I don't know, but we just haven't found any kind of rhythm yet. DH, who has concerns about hs anyway, is already worried that we're screwing things up. So, in no particular order, here are my concerns now that we're on Week 2.

1. Do you wake your child for school? I've never woken DC unless we had to be somewhere, and I'm finding that trying to transition to that point is really not happening for us. On the completely useless master schedule I created, we were starting at 8:00, but DS would prefer to sleep until 8:30 or 9. My question is whether sleeping until you're ready to get up is a benefit of homeschooling or I'm preparing him for a life without self-discipline?

2. My 3YO!!! I love her dearly, but she's a chatterbox. She talks incessantly, and though her language skills are extraordinary (seriously, the dev psych called her a "language phenom") for a 3YO, it still gets really tiring to listen to her all day. I don't know what to do with her so that DS can get work done. I checked out some books on CD at the library, but unfortunately they only have a few. I am considering a mother's morning out program just to give me 1-2 mornings a week w/ DS with no distractions.

3. I have no clue what I'm doing as far as curriculum. I really like classical education (a la WTM, since I know there are many classical-based approaches). So we're doing lots of read-alouds, and DS & I work on his reading. I wanted to do science & social studies, but I don't know what to do. Is it okay (in general, I get that there are no rules here) to just focus on language arts (incorporating science/social studies readings into our read alouds) until later - say, after Christmas?

I'm posting about math in another thread because it became a lengthy diatribe. Please give me any advice or (gentle) criticism.

[sahmoffour]

The best advice I've received so far (this is my first year as well and I was majorly overwhelmed with "how to get it all done" and having four kids ages 8,6,3 & 2) is: stick to the basics! Just stick with LA and Math to start with. Then once you get a rhythm going (and this will take time!), add in the extras. Realize that unless you are superwoman, you will not meet your expectations to start with. I had these dreams in my head of how our days would run, but it just wasn't feasible. I've lightened my expectations of myself, and now, I consider it a successful day if we made it through LA and Math, I have supper made, and the house is decently clean. If we made it through all four of our daily subjects and the rest is also completed, then it's an amazing day!

OH, edited to answer your other questions. I don't wake my children for school, I figure that's one of the benefits of homeschooling! My two younger kids are really good at interruptions, so I bought a bunch of new Kumon workbooks, lacing toys, puzzles, crafty type things that they are only allowed to play with during school time. It definitely helps a lot, and worst case, I throw on a dvd.

[Princess ConsuelaB]

Sounds normal to me Vmom It will take time(even weeks. Even months! ) to find your particular rhythm.

I don't wake my kids up "for school" no. I used to, at the beginning. Now I let them get the sleep their bodies tell them they need and realize (to a point) that it's a healthy luxury that they wouldn't have were they in school. Studies are showing that their schooled peers really need more sleep than they can get you know We've been doing it this way for a few years and my eldest dd(11) has no problems transitioning and getting up and going on those "scheduled" days when she does have to be up at a certain time.

It's been a few years since I had to teach school with a toddler underfoot, my youngest is in school with us now. I always had a special school box just for her filled with coloring books, paper doll and activity books, age appropriate puzzles and early learning toys, math manipulatives and blocks. I rotated the contents on a regular basis so there were always new surprises. This was her "school" and it only came out during older sister's schooltime. this worked well for us but my toddler was the quieter one. I think the mother's day out is a great idea if that's what it takes for you!

Don't sweat about the curriculum, it's better to take your time figuring out what really works for you than forcing yourselves to just. pick. something. and sticking with it even if it makes you both miserable(learned that one the hard way!). Read alouds and working on his reading skills sounds great, absolutely combine them! There are loads of early readers on a plethora of history and science subjects you can incorporate into his reading lessons. We still use read alouds for these subjects and we're entering our sixth year of homeschooling.

I'm not sure what's going on with you in math but I think it's alright to delay it a bit until you're ready. With my oldest we skipped nearly a year of math in second grade. It's a long story but simply put we chose the wrong curriculum for her(but thought we had to stick with it). She dug in her heels and it became such a struggle that she wasn't retaining anything at all and we both became more and more frustrated. She was just in tears when math time came. Finally I decided it was better to shelve it for a while and concentrate on her other subjects. When third grade came around we tried again with a new curriculum; this one worked much better for us. Once she was "ready" for math it didn't take her any time to catch up at all.

Anyway, *deep breaths* it's only week two, you're doing fine! Easier said than done I know, I remember spending my entire first year(or two) worrying that I was screwing it up...heck, I still do!

[CrazyCatLady]

Good grief lady...you're only on week two! You should seriously go easier yourself. Even real teachers are probably still getting their grooves going during the second week. I don't have a ton of advice because I mostly unschool, but I just wanted to pop in and tell you that I'm sure you're doing fine. I'd give it at least two months before even starting to worry if things aren't working out.

I let my daughter sleep in until she wakes up on her own. Kids need much more sleep then they generally get in this country, so I take advantage of the opportunity to let her sleep in. She never has trouble waking up early on the days that she needs to for field trips, etc.

I've homeschooled with a younger one running around and it is much harder. The morning out program may be good for her since she's so chatty and social anyways. Or if you do tv time you could save it for when you're doing school with the bigger one. Snacks or home school only toys can help distract. Sometimes I'd work with my big one on the patio while the young one ran around the yard. I had a bucket of all kinds of arts and crafts that I let the little one go through when I was doing work with my older one. Beads, glitter, paper, etc. It was very messy. But I figure the art was educational for him while I worked with her.

I'm sure you'll figure this all out soon enough. Are you joining any home school groups? Those were life savers for me and really helped me to start feeling like a real home schooler sooner rather than later.

[SundayCrepes]

I'm also an unschooler so I don't have any experience with trying to teach a formal curriculum. I would also let your kids sleep until they waken. My daughter is 2 and it is near impossible to do anything with her around. Are there "homeschool activities" your daughter can do while you work with your son? Someone else already mentioned art stuff. What about age appropriate workbooks or coloring sheets or something?

[harmat]

I think you might want to look at your achievements in the medium long term. Learning is not linear, it comes in bursts and spurts. And so does my level of being on top of things, if I'm honest.
How old is your child? We've been homeschooling for three years, the first half of that was spent purely playing, running outdoors, climbing trees, painting, listening to stories. Focused academic type work came in bit by bit, while the above still take up much of dd's time.
About your little one - could you start your day with some activity both kids can do (perhaps something lively), followed by something short with focusing on the younger child (story, craft)? She might then be able to play independently for you to work with older child.

[VisionaryMom]

Originally Posted by CrazyCatLady

Good grief lady...you're only on week two!

What kind I say? I'm a Type A personality.

Seriously, though, I probably should ease up; I just thought we'd slide into things.

Originally Posted by harmat

About your little one - could you start your day with some activity both kids can do (perhaps something lively), followed by something short with focusing on the younger child (story, craft)? She might then be able to play independently for you to work with older child.

I like this idea! I will think about it.

DH & I talked about it last night. He's going to call about an afternoon program this week for her, so we may do that.

I have tried putting together her own activities. That was my original plan, but she talks through them. DH said it better last night - "she doesn't have the typical three-year-old's one track mind." While she was coloring yesterday, she was saying, "oh, and I have to get an x-ray of my knee [which was true; we did that in the afternoon] because your knee bends. It's what lets your legs work so you can walk. My doctor is worried about my knee. Something could be wrong with it, and I won't be able to walk right anymore" and on and on and on until "oh good, I'm done coloring this cat now. I chose brown because I saw a brown cat once when I was at Grandma's house. Last week at Grandma's house..." (unfortunately Grandma is too far away for daily visits ). Meanwhile, DS has gotten zilch done.

Anyway, I'm going to try a dd-level early morning task and then try to convince her to play in her room while DS & I work.

[Kindermama]

When expectations are too high, we're bound to fail! Train your mind to have reasonable expectations of yourself and your children! You're homeschooling so you have the gift of flexibility to use!

Let your son sleep in, start "school" at 9:30 after he's up and had breakfast. Use those earlier hours to spend time with your 4 yo. Start morning chores, including her in the process, read aloud to her, bake or start lunch/dinner prep to music, play a board game, go outside in the backyard, etc! She will probably be more likely to play independently once your son wakes up. During his school time, give her playdoh, puzzles, coloring books, watercolor paint & paper, blocks, craft kits she can do independently etc.

If your son seems like he is still sleepy at 9:30, then take a family walk to wake everyone up and start school at 10!

[kathymuggle]

I would spend some intense one on one time with DD before Ds starts his work. Maybe she will get some of the need for chattering and your attention out of your system - at least for a little while, lol.

I would not create a task for her unless she is asking for it- not only is it unecessary work, but simple play is so important for 3 yr olds.

I would not wake a child up early - there is usually no issue in switching everything an hour or so later.

[VisionaryMom]

Originally Posted by Kindermama

When expectations are too high, we're bound to fail! Train your mind to have reasonable expectations of yourself and your children!

Yeah, this should be my motto. I think I'm just second-guessing myself, though I *know* there are no schooling options here that make sense for us.

Originally Posted by Kindermama

Let your son sleep in, start "school" at 9:30 after he's up and had breakfast. Use those earlier hours to spend time with your 4 yo. Start morning chores, including her in the process, read aloud to her, bake or start lunch/dinner prep to music, play a board game, go outside in the backyard, etc! She will probably be more likely to play independently once your son wakes up. During his school time, give her playdoh, puzzles, coloring books, watercolor paint & paper, blocks, craft kits she can do independently etc.

DD & I spent time together this morning. They're asking to go to "free swim" at the Y, so maybe we should just work those things in. I do freelance work, and I really, really wanted some early morning time to myself, but I think maybe that's not going to happen. Life feels like a constant adjustment.

Originally Posted by kathymuggle

I would spend some intense one on one time with DD before Ds starts his work. Maybe she will get some of the need for chattering and your attention out of your system - at least for a little while, lol.

You know, she doesn't even need anybody to respond! She will follow you and talk, and you can just say "oh," and she continues. In fact, if you try to talk, she gets agitated with you for "interrupting!" I've tried really hard to push talking to the dog or her toys, but I've had no luck so far. We had friends who needed a major house project done this weekend. DH went to help out, and DD talked to their 1YO the whole time. Later, she said, "I like playing with [1YO]. She just lets you talk and talk while she listens!"

[kathymuggle]

Originally Posted by VisionaryMom

DH went to help out, and DD talked to their 1YO the whole time. Later, she said, "I like playing with [1YO]. She just lets you talk and talk while she listens!"

Well, there you go...you need to have a baby, lol.

Your kids sound delightful, btw.

My oldest was quite the talker when he was young - he told the longest, most elaborate stories. He still talks a fair bit (although not as much as when he was 4-9) - which is nice, cause not all teens do!

[zjande]

Can you just do school with your son over her talking? That's how things are done around here with my soon-to-be 7th grader. We just talk loudly above the dull roar of all his little brothers (ages 4.5, 2.5, & 10 months). I'll remind them to quiet down if I'm in the middle of reading aloud or something, otherwise, I just sit right next to him & kinda yell over the baby I'm breastfeeding. lol My 4 yr old talks&talks&talks&talks.

Now that he's older & can work much more independently, I'll spend a little time with him in the morning, then leave him at the dining table to work on his stuff & I take all the littles in the family room. I have a small classroom table in there where we do some coloring, cutting & preschool work so my 7th grader can have some mostly uninterrupted time.

You'll always have the distractions from your dd. I'm not sure sending her away is going to solve that in the long term. Y'know? Your ds is going to have to become accustomed to getting his work done amidst her chatting & busy-ness someday.

Regarding waking them for school, we don't, but we do have a family "no sleeping past 10am" general rule. And, I too would just focus on math & LA for the time being. Until you find your rhythm, get a chance to understand more & more what kind of curriculum would suit your ds best, & get a chance to spend time looking at some.

Good luck with everything! And try not to freak out, homeschooling really IS fun & totally worth it. All that being said though, it took me years before I even approached feeling confident in my schooling abilities, and I still have freak out moments that I'm doing it all wrong to this very day. So, some freaking out is normal & just part of the fun.

[phathui5]

I don't know, but we just haven't found any kind of rhythm yet

It's ok! You're only in your second week. Give yourself time to find what works for your family.

[broodymama]

I don't wake DS1 for school, or more realistically he doesn't wake the rest of us. He's a morning kid and wakes up early, but his sisters need to sleep a bit more. Last night was a rough one for me and the girls (and baby) slept in until about 9:30. He's done some handwriting and is reading right now, I'm still caffeinating myself and pretending I'm awake. Other days we're up and going by 7 am. That flexibility is one of the thinks I like about homeschooling.

We're easing into the year also. Last week we just did reading, handwriting and math. This week we're adding in a little more, and once we get into a groove with this then we'll add in science and some light history. I'm just taking it easy and not getting stressed out about it. I also have 4 year old DD1 who is hanging around either watching or coloring, 2 year old DD2 who rampages through and destroys the rest of the house while I'm involved with DS1, and 2 month old DS2 who nurses constantly, doesn't like to be worn and screams his head off if I put him down.

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by VisionaryMom

1. Do you wake your child for school? I've never woken DC unless we had to be somewhere, and I'm finding that trying to transition to that point is really not happening for us. On the completely useless master schedule I created, we were starting at 8:00, but DS would prefer to sleep until 8:30 or 9. My question is whether sleeping until you're ready to get up is a benefit of homeschooling or I'm preparing him for a life without self-discipline?

I consider a good night's sleep really important, and if my child isn't ready to wake up at 8:00, I see no benefit in getting them up at that time. I don't think honouring one's need to sleep is about lacking discipline. Most people in North America are sleep deprived, to various degrees, and we pay a heavy price - physically and psychologically - for that. I definitely consider the ability to honour all our sleep needs to be a benefit of homeschooling (ds2 still takes naps more than a lot of kids I know, too - and we can fit that in).

2. My 3YO!!! I love her dearly, but she's a chatterbox. She talks incessantly, and though her language skills are extraordinary (seriously, the dev psych called her a "language phenom") for a 3YO, it still gets really tiring to listen to her all day. I don't know what to do with her so that DS can get work done. I checked out some books on CD at the library, but unfortunately they only have a few. I am considering a mother's morning out program just to give me 1-2 mornings a week w/ DS with no distractions.

This can be a problem. I ended up putting ds2 in preschool (3 half days a week) last year, just so I could work with dd1. The solution to this is going to vary from one family to another, but that worked for us.

3. I have no clue what I'm doing as far as curriculum. I really like classical education (a la WTM, since I know there are many classical-based approaches). So we're doing lots of read-alouds, and DS & I work on his reading. I wanted to do science & social studies, but I don't know what to do. Is it okay (in general, I get that there are no rules here) to just focus on language arts (incorporating science/social studies readings into our read alouds) until later - say, after Christmas?

I don't see why not. I'm much more unstructured than you're trying to be, and it seems to be working out pretty well so far. You could also just leave those areas loose for a while - carve out a couple hours a week to just follow your child's lead. DD1 is completely fascinated by spiders, so most of her science learning has been about spiders, but she branches off.

I don't know how old your kids are, but there are various ways to work things in. For dd1's kindergarten year, we were totally out to lunch (I was pregnant, exhausted, and ds2 was raising six kinds of chaos every day - peeing on rugs, spilling stuff, hitting people, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.). Her schedule for last year was like this (the bolded times are when ds2 was at preschool):

Monday afternoon: Library day. Go to library and pick out 4-5 books, a mix of non-fiction (often spiders, but some other things as well) and fiction.
Wednesday afternoon: Reading day. There were lots of other times that dh or I read to dd1, but this was the one time that I promised her we'd do a good, solid block of reading. I'd read to her for a minimum of 30 minutes, sometimes up to an hour and a half. We'd also do a little bit of work on her reading, but didn't get far. (It turned out she has severe astigmatisms and was having a lot of trouble with blurring. She now has glasses, and the difference has been amazing.)
Wednesdays, late afternoon: Ballet class. DD1 really, really wanted to learn to dance.
Friday morning: "Messy Art Day". She had a couple of uninterrupted hours to work on art projects that were too messy and/or concentration intensive to handle with her little brother around. (I don't remember them all, but we did tie dye, making lip balm, working with a children's pottery wheel, som fingerpainting, etc.)
Friday, every other afternoon: "Hula Hoot", which is a local meetup for homelearning families. The kids play, and the parents socialize, and there are healthy snacks and lots of games/activities.

And, honestly...most of the rest of our week was pretty freewheeling - lots of playground time to let them burn off energy. We went on nature walks, did trips to the local farm, aquarium and science center, and spent some time on math (ended up getting a curriculum, called Math Mammoth, because I was just confusing things - I'm very good at math, but had trouble explaining it clearly to dd1) and whatever. DD1 would print up my shopping lists for me (she wanted to) and help me cross things off. We'd talk about all kinds of things. She did jigsaw puzzles, including one that's a map of Canada, so we talked about Canadian geography, etc. This year, I'm planning to try to work in a bit of volunteer work, when I can figure out something I can take the three youngest to.

DS2 becomes and "official" homelearner this year, so I'm not sure what our days will look like this year.

[CariOfOz]

Originally Posted by VisionaryMom

So we're in Week 2 of homeschooling, basically because we started with the local public schools. I think that was a mistake. I don't know, but we just haven't found any kind of rhythm yet. DH, who has concerns about hs anyway, is already worried that we're screwing things up. So, in no particular order, here are my concerns now that we're on Week 2.

I agree with the pp's.. relax! There is NO way you can screw up in 2 weeks I'm guessing (you don't seem to say specificially) that your ds is in K or grade 1 ish? Even IF you don't get more than a little bit of 'academics' done, when the younger gets a little older and (hopefully ) settles down a bit, he'll zoom along making up lost time.

1. Do you wake your child for school? I've never woken DC unless we had to be somewhere, and I'm finding that trying to transition to that point is really not happening for us. On the completely useless master schedule I created, we were starting at 8:00, but DS would prefer to sleep until 8:30 or 9. My question is whether sleeping until you're ready to get up is a benefit of homeschooling or I'm preparing him for a life without self-discipline?

Absolutely! Unfortunately MY boys wake up at the butt crack of dawn So I'm incredibly jealous of your 9am+ sleeper I know that when *I* was in school, having to wake up at 630am to be on the bus by 730 and in class by 830 KILLED ME. My brain does not function it's best at that time, and I'm sure everything said in my first class dribbled out my ears

2. My 3YO!!! I love her dearly, but she's a chatterbox. She talks incessantly, and though her language skills are extraordinary (seriously, the dev psych called her a "language phenom") for a 3YO, it still gets really tiring to listen to her all day. I don't know what to do with her so that DS can get work done. I checked out some books on CD at the library, but unfortunately they only have a few. I am considering a mother's morning out program just to give me 1-2 mornings a week w/ DS with no distractions.

oh my, that sounds like MY 4yo! He sing songs and chatters on about everything! I just have to talk around him sometimes

3. I have no clue what I'm doing as far as curriculum. I really like classical education (a la WTM, since I know there are many classical-based approaches). So we're doing lots of read-alouds, and DS & I work on his reading. I wanted to do science & social studies, but I don't know what to do. Is it okay (in general, I get that there are no rules here) to just focus on language arts (incorporating science/social studies readings into our read alouds) until later - say, after Christmas?

I think it's just fine to start with the basics... a little 'real life' math and a lot of read alouds and phonics/sight words (or a combo of the 2). Even if you JUST do that, depending on the topics of the books, you'll cover a lot more! (For Social studies, we do History Odyssey and science is Real science Odyssey , both from Pandia press.com excellent and fun programs!)

Relax mama, your child's brain isn't going to go 'poof' in the time it takes you to find the groove that works best for your family! Even in 'school' the first few weeks, especially with the younger set, is getting settled into routines, seeing where each student is 'at' and getting to know everyone ..you'll do fine

[Love_My_Babies]

I hope things are going well for you. I just wanted to thank you for posting your questions and concerns. I am a first timer starting in a few weeks, and this discussion has really made me sit back and think. It really gave my expectations and plans a reality check! Anyway, thanks for being so honest and open. It really helped one other mama!