Methods of putting babies to sleep - please share yours!

[Laurodactyl]

I have an 8 month old who will not go down without being "bounced" in a bouncy chair for a half hour or more. It's ridiculous: he is totally outgrowing the chair. His butt hits the ground when we bounce him and his head and legs are off the ends of the chair. But, it is the only way he'll go to sleep for nighttime or naps.

If we try to hold him he just wriggles and arches his back and cries or screams. It we try to just lay him in the crib he also cries/screams. I'm not about to just let him cry, as some do. He will go to sleep in bed with us, but that doesn't work for us, because I cannot sleep well at all if he is in there. He has never fallen completely asleep from nursing, even back when I nursed him for hours at a time. He always wakes up when I take him off the boob. So the only solution seems to be bouncing him in this stupid tiny chair. Will we ever get away from it? Has anyone else had this problem?

So, my question to all you mamas is: what is your method of putting your baby down? I'm out of ideas and would love to hear "how it's done". How does one but a baby down if rocking and holding and nursing don't work? What else is there? There surely must be something.... Thank you!!

[ErinYay]

We've gone back to swaddling. V needed to be swaddled for naps, but not bedtime (we cosleep) from birth to about 3 months.

Since about 7 months, I found that she settles for naps very easily if she's swaddled.

I take her to our room, side-lay to nurse, and if she's in the right mood, she'll settle and fall asleep, then I unwrap her and lay her down in her cosleeper. If she's in a kick-happy mood, I either gently swaddle her with my body- her feet between my legs, my arms holding her close to me with her arms pinned, and she'll often fall asleep like that. When it doesn't work, or when it's really hot so her sweaty skin irritates my sweaty skin (or vice versa) I use a baby blanket, unfolded, and wrap her up like a pig-in-a-blanket.

As when she was tiny, she'll be angered about the swaddle for a few seconds, but once she realizes she safe and cozy, she goes right to sleep.

At bed, she's out like a light, as we're all up there together. once or twice a week she'll wake up to ride the Tour de France, then she gets swaddled or she'll kick me for HOURS.

I think for her it's largely developmental- those legs just have a mind of their own, and we hope once she starts walking (sooner rather than later we think- she can now stand alone for 30 seconds to a minute- terrified the entire time, poor girl) she'll settle down.

[Tway]

For naps, I lay DD down on our bed, nurse her, then pop in the paci. She'll put her arm around my neck and wiggle a bit, but usually that's all it takes. I also make sure she's tired--usually 3 hours after she's up, then 2 1/2 to 3 hours after her 1st nap. She also naps in her carriage on walks.

For nighttime, I will nurse then rock her in my arms. I kiss her between the eyes to get her to close them, then rock, rock, rock. However, it's usually DH who puts her to bed, and he lies her down on the bed, pops in the paci, and shushes her.

ETA: And DD has also been doing that kick, kick, pull hair, kick, twist, slap mom in face, turn, kick thing at least twice a week for the last 2 months or so. Lord, I hope it'll go away when she finally walks...

[Strong Mama]

I always just from day one fed my boys, woke them gently if they were asleep from the feed so that they were aware they were being put down, so they didnt associate feeds with sleepy time, and they went to sleep.When they got to be talking toddlers they actually asked to go night nights and I would put them in their cribs and they would fall asleep. I was lucky. Then again, both my boys hated cuddle time for sleep and just wanted to be left alone and not touched while sleeping. My oldest slept with me til he was 4. (except for naps)My youngest ds had to be on his own.

[akind1]

Lately I have held, but not really rocked, DS to sleep for night time. not facing me, he doesn't like that so well when he's tired, but facing out, with his head on my shoulder. I don't really focus on getting him to sleep, but just sit quietly (usually we are watching TV) for a while, and he drifts off.

[Devaskyla]

Have you tried baby wearing? It would give him the bouncing movement he seems to want.

I always nurse mine to sleep or babywear. Once in awhile he'll go to sleep without any help, but not often.

[sparklett]

At that age, DS would go on my back in the Mei Tai and I would walk around the house while he fell asleep. We turned off all of the lights and the TV, and I would put on a headlight and read a book until he nodded off. I read a ton of good books that way!

It will get better, I promise. Fast-forward to now, when DS is 3 y.o., and he goes to sleep like a champ. We read a book, rub his back, nurse (if he asks). And he's out in 10 minutes.

[azgirl]

Our methods evolved from swaddling and rocking/cuddling till about 9 months (6 months adjusted) to co sleeping and now at 2.5 to reading and sitting nearby while he falls asleep (he is still in our bed, though) we plan to gradually transition him to his own bed in our room. My son was about 18 months when he stopped wanting to be touched or cuddled to sleep, but he wanted us right there...but he takes a while to wind down so it took me a while to figure out that I needed to sit close by and let him blow off energy. It sounds like your LO might have a little of that-he needs your help to wind down but he doesn't want to cuddle or be nursed to sleep. I think we probably spend an hour a day total getting our toddler to sleep, but then he sleeps for 14 hours total for the day, so I think that time is a good investment and I just try to keep it a peaceful meditative time and not a chore. Maybe it will help you feel better to think of that 30 minutes more positively? It really seems like a pretty reasonable amount of time to me, even though you might rather be doing something else... I have a couple of questions:

He falls asleep in the bouncy and then you move him where? He stays asleep?

What specifically about him sleeping with you keeps you up? Is it his movement, his noisiness or just the idea of him sleeping next to you that is keeping you up?

I know my husband sleeps much better without our son in bed but he puts up with it because it makes bedtime so easy and my son sleeps 12 hours straight (the whole "why mess" with it thing) We have found some ways of making it easier on my husband if you are interested in that.

Oh, I should add that the fact that you have two reliable (but not your first choice) ways of getting your 8-month old to sleep is something to cheer about you are doing a great job!!

[sillysmile]

Our 19m DD has pretty much always needed motion to go to sleep... for the first 8 months or so we bounced her while walking and tightly swaddled, and now most times it's the rocking chair or the bouncy ball (large birth ball), followed by a transfer to the bed once she's asleep. A handful of times I've been able to lie down next to her and bounce the bed to get her to sleep, but that's only happened recently and if she's really tired. DH usually does bedtime and I do naps, each of which take 15-45 min depending on her mood.

I second the babywearing recommendation, especially for naps. There were times when DD was younger when the only way that I could get her to nap was to put her on and leave the house for a hike. It had to be steady walking down the road for 15-30 min.. no walking around the house with stops and starts.

[Llyra]

At that age, the only way to get DS to fall asleep was to put him in the Maya wrap (no other sling would do), and walk at a steady pace from the back door to the front door, back and forth and back and forth, while bopping up and down, patting his bum, and singing, "I've been working on the railroad, all the livelong day" at the top of my lungs.

He didn't mind much if I changed the words, so I'd find myself singing, "I've been singing this *expletive* song, all the live long day," or "I'm gonna go NUTSO, all the livelong day." But if I tried another tune, forget it-- the deal was off.

So I hear you on the ridiculous.

My DD2 would sleep if held on her side and bounced in someone's arms, with a paci or the breast-- the only trick was you had to be standing in my kitchen bathroom, with the fan on. Never did figure that one out...

Hmmm.... I guess I'm not much help... I hope you find something that works. It can take a lot of time and patience to create new falling-asleep habits. What I wound up doing, with both DD2 and DS (DD1 never had this issue, bless her) was to lie down next to them and nurse them to sleep side-lying, and then really slowly slip away from them. It took some time and a lot of false starts, though.

[newmamalizzy]

I second the bouncy exercise ball. It seems like it would be a similar experience for your LO to the motion of the bouncy seat.

I'm definitely not a putting-baby-to-sleep expert, but a few weird things do work for us: One is giving DD little kisses on her cheeks and forehead. Sometimes she will drop off mid-scream if I do this. It's odd. Second is putting pressure on her, similar to what a PP said about swaddling with her body. I pin down one of her arms with one hand and place my other forearm over her legs to hold them firmly down. This works well when I've just transferred DD from sleeping in arms to the crib and she woke up a bit, but I can't usually put her to sleep this way unless she's very tired.

[Red Pajama]

I would still be swaddling at 8 months. My go to stragegy is swaddle and nurse to sleep. There's also the 'rocking/pat the bottom rhythmically while singing a lullaby' as a second choice.

[aprons_and_acorns]

Originally Posted by newmamalizzy

I second the bouncy exercise ball.

We went through a bouncy exercise ball phase with DS. It worked like a charm!

[Shanny2032]

At home we have always co slept for night and naps but I take her to work with me all week as a Nanny and for as long as I can remember she slept in a car seat that was on a swing frame. very proud to have just broken that habit at 19 months! Luckily she was tiny and could technically, at least weight wise, fit in the seat. I honestly started to wonder if we would every move past it but let her do it in her own time. Of course that's easy for me to say since it was actually the opposite of what you are doing - yours takes work and mine worked for me because I COULDNT sit there are rock or bounce her to sleep! What happens if he is in the chair but you don't bounce it. I think that like anything it is just his association and that after a few (TOUGH!) days/nights he would transfer his association to whatever you stuck with. Good luck I know how hard it is!

[emiree]

I always wear my DD in a maya wrap ring sling until she's asleep. Then, I transfer her to a Kanoe baby hammock (goes up to 50 lbs or something like that). It is on a spring from the ceiling, so you can bounce it up and down. We just started in at 8 months (I wish I would have had this from the beginning!) b/c it is a perfect place for naps since we co-sleep at night.

[luckymamaoftwo]

Well I'm certainly no expert, but wanted to share how I get my 6 month old to sleep. He wouldn't accept the swaddle, so I have always danced around with him, paci in his mouth, since his birth. He doesn't like me to sit and rock (darn..bought the new glider for this little guy and he won't have it!), so I walk around the room, or bounce, or dance...whatever it takes. He does on occasion, nurse to sleep, but it's pretty rare and he has to be super exhausted.

I'm with the previous posters and suggest that you try a carrier/sling of some sort. And if the bouncy seat works, I would probably just go with it for the time being, even though it feels ridiculous.