Help me convince her

[Gidget]

I am going back to work soon. One of the girls I will be working with (again) is pregnant. She saw me nursing my ds one day when I was there and she told another coworker later how gross it was, I had my boobs all hanging out, etc. I want her to see bf'ing as normal and preferred. So, when I go back to work I plan to give her a copy of 101 reasons to breastfeed. Since I already have something telling of the "benefits" of nursing I need to find info on the risks of ff'ing. I need some good links or info to print out please.

Ginger

[Elphaba]

Well, this is not the popular stance, but I don't think you CAN convince her. She already has children, and she thinks nursing is gross. She's not going to totally change course because you show her data and studies that say kids need to nurse. If she changes her mind and nurses, it's going to come from her, not from external sources.

You could tell her that you heard what she said about you, and that if she would like to ask any questions about breastfeeding, no matter how weird or personal, you'd be happy to answer her.

[Evergreen]

i am inclined to agree with Elphaba, however I would still give her info just can't think of anything good at the moment.

It totally amazes me how many people think that nursing a child is gross:

[Elphaba]

Yes, it's the "gross" comment that would make me inclined to avoid talking to her. When a mom tried to nurse and failed because of lack of support, or lack of information, then I totally try to get her hooked up with what she needs to nurse her next baby. But when someone has NO interest in nursing, or thinks it's gross, I just let it go. Everyone knows we are a bfing family, and they can come to me when they want to, but I'm not going to bang my head against a brick wall for anyone. They have to want me to help.

[captain optimism]

I have a friend at work who doesn't bf and it does bug me that she doesn't. I let her know that I was a resource to her if she wanted any information about it. We do parenting differently, except that it's obvious that we both love our children a lot!

Of course, at my work, we actually PROMOTE breastfeeding in one of the programs we offer, and that program has a lactation consultant on staff. Still, a lot of staff and clients feed their babies formula.

You can let this mom know that you know a lot about breastfeeding and that if she wants any information about how to do it, you would be delighted to share. The problem with "risks of formula feeding" is that if she has children who have been fed formula, and they didn't get ear infections, etc. then she's not going to take that very seriously.

[Gidget]

Actually, this is her first child. I will be pumping at work so I am hoping that curiosity will get the better of her. I was thinking that she may be closed minded to it. But I wanted to offer anyway.

Ginger

[rareimer]

she thinks it's gross? does she drink cow's milk? coz i don't get how people think a baby drinking human milk is gross, but have no problem with children and adults drinking milk from a cow... :

here is a bunch of info about the risks of formula...i have lots of other links too, but it would take me all day to post them! there are alot of links within this one.

http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/mi...t-formula.html

[Firemom]

I have a friend who has 3 kids and also thinks breastfeeding is gross and disgusting (her words).

We've talked about breastfeeding many times, she agrees it the best thing for babies but can't get past the fact that its gross.

Doesn't hurt to talk about it and if you do change her mind, great, we can add at least one convert

[Elphaba]

Well, if this is her first baby it's a whole other ball game!
In that case, I would ask her if she knows anyone else who breastfed. Probably not, right? So you could open the dialogue that way, and let her know that it can seem like a totally weird thing to do -- use your breasts as food -- until you actually DO it. I knew I would bf, but it was still a weird concept to me and I wasn't really comfortable with other people nursing until I was pregnant and trying to see how they did it! If you're at all friendly with her, ask her to hang out a little with you and your baby. Take a walk or watch a movie or something, not with the express purpose of talking breastfeeding, but just integrating the actual nursing session into the visit so she can see how easy and normal it is.

Presenting people with lists can be off-putting, especially if they didn't ask you for information, KWIM?

[rareimer]

here are a few more:

http://www.wiessinger.baka.com/bfing...stvbottle.html
http://www.infactcanada.ca/foodgrup.htm
http://www.breastfeeding.com/reading..._disaster.html
http://www.breastfeedingtaskforla.org/ABMRisks.htm
http://www.breastfeeding.com/reading...w_formula.html
http://www.cs.colorado.edu/~kolina/a...f-formula.html

[velcromom]

nak

Reasons To Avoid Feeding Formula

http://www.todaysparent.com/baby/bre...807_101250_216


http://www.naturalfamilyonline.com/...mula-report.htm
__________________

An examination of research on infant mortality rates and feeding practices:
http://www.naturalfamilyonline.com/B...la-report2.htm

Virgin gut:
http://breastfeed.com/resources/articles/virgingut.htm

Formula for Disaster:
http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/1999/07/19/formula/

Benefits of bf vs. ff
http://www.lalecheleague.org/cbi/bio...m#_Toc28845409

Links to articles
http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/in...a.html#formula


http://www.babymilkaction.org/

[Mothra]

You might be able to find out why she thinks it is gross. I had a neighbor a while back that kept saying that she thought breastfeeding and anything that has to do with breasts was gross. I found out later, after she moved away, that her father took pictures of her breasts while she was sleeping as a child and showed them to his friends at poker games. Another friend, who also thought bf was 'gross', grew up in a home where her body was something to be ashamed of. Her mother would ground her if a guy in the gas station looked at her in a way her mother found inappropriate. Some women have never even seen anyone breastfeed before. Let's face it, not all women grow up in supportive, breastfeeding-positive homes. It certainly isn't something we see in the media or represented in pop culture at all.

If you go into this judging her, which it doesn't sound like you are, you are just going to alienate her more. You might just try approaching her and letting her know that you know what she said and you aren't angry and see if she opens up to you. I think it is great that you are concerned for this woman and her baby.