S/O: Is your circd DH fine with leaving your boy intact? - Page 3

[eclipse]

Originally Posted by A&A

He's more than "fine" with it!!!

This was our original convo:
Me: "We're not circ'ing our son."
Dh: "Ok."

That's pretty much how our conversation went, too. I'm so glad we didn't have to fight it out like I hear so many women having to.

[outlier]

Uh, I don't know for sure yet.

I'm 33 weeks pregnant with our first. Baby's sex is unknown, and dh and I have not yet had "the talk." I've been waiting for the topic to come up on its own, and so far it just hasn't, not even at any of our prenatal appointments. The reason I haven't brought it up is because I feel SO strongly about this subject, I'm afraid I'll end up giving him a big, scary lecture on the horrors of circ when a simple "I don't want us to do that" will suffice. We've only been married a couple years now; no need to make him think he married a crazy person already! We'll go to the hospital's birthing class later this month, and I'm sure it'll be discussed then (and I dare the instructor to try to spout off any misinformation...).

Having said that, I don't think I'll have anything to worry about. He actually made an off-hand remark not long ago to some friends in which he referred to doctors who circ as "mutilators." The friends didn't have a response, but I swear I fell even more in love with him in that moment!

[2goingon2]

Yes and in fact he was adamant about our sons not being circumcised. He feels (as do I) that it is mutilation.

[JollyGG]

Leaving our son intact was my circumcised DH's idea. I'd done some research on it and at that point was pretty neutral on the idea of circumcision with a slight bias against it. I asked hubby what he thought and he said he didn't want it done.

Years later in discussions he said he'd learned more about circ. at some point in his teens early 20s and kinda wished that his parents hadn't done it to him, though he excepts that you can't change the past and that his parents did the best they could with the information they had. His best friend growing up was born over seas and was intact. So intact wasn't that strange a concept to him.

[hollytheteacher]

Yeah my dh said it was totally up to me since i do all the research on "baby" stuff anyway. When I told him what a horrible procedure it was he got 100% on board. He thinks it is horrible that anyone would choose to do it to a baby now with all the info out there!

[listipton]

Dh wasn't at first...but it was relatively 'easy' to change his mind once he had heard my arguments and his own questions were answered. Now he has no problem with it.

[ThisCat]

Completely fine. We talked about the arguments for and against it for a few minutes and came to an agreement immediately. He's happy with his penis but didn't feel the need to make our son's match for no good reason.

[whozeyermamma]

DH was originally in the "I was OK, he'd be OK too" camp - he also thought un-circed penises looked "weird" but then I turned him around.

One of the biggest factors that convinced him was the fact that circ only became popular i the US as an anti-masturbation campaign - he's deeply suspicious of the medical community as it is (he was arguing for an unassisted chilbirth) ... so it irked him to no end.

We now joke that our son will make fun of HIM - like, "Hey Dad - what happened to your junk, man! Look how I'm hangin!"

[Galatea]

Dh was at first angry that I would not allow our first to be circumcised, but I stood firm and he came around. Now he is an intactivist (though he won't bring it up unasked) and he says that not circumcising the boys was the BEST of all our parenting (non-)decisions.

[japonica]

My DH is okay with it. Beyond much more than that, I don't know. He doesn't discuss it much. We had the initial conversation when we found out we were having a boy and I told him that there was no way in hell anyone was going to circ my son and he said, "okay, then," and that was it. But I don't see him posting anti-circ stuff on fb or anything. LOL. I recall we did discuss restoration for him once and he shot it down totally and said, nope, never going to happen, so that's the end of those type of conversations.

[Poodge]

When we found out we were having a son I suggested we do some research on the issue. (I already knew I was not going to allow it to happen.) He and I spent about 5 minutes on the computer and he said - "I don't see any reason to do that to our child."

[Neuromancer]

My circ'd husband was fine with the idea of not doing it if we have a boy.