How to help 8 year old with night time dryness? *Happy Update post 11*

[Pumpkin_Pie]

My neighbor's daughter who thinks of me as an "Auntie" was absolutely humiliated tonight when her mama brought down all of her bedding to bring to my house to wash and announced in front of me and all three of her sisters that it was from her bed because she pees the bed nearly every night. I was horrified for her, and angry as heck at her mom, but at this point, the damage is done and I would love to help her.

I shared with her that I too wet the bed until I was quite old (nearly 10) and that she would eventually grow out of it, and I was willing to do some research to see what I could find to help her out. She was very excited about me trying to help, and I did speak to her mama about how it was definitely not her fault in any way. Her mom is at her wits end, and with her washing machine recently having broken, she is just feeling extremely stressed out about it. She has four girls and is a single mama and the one who is younger than the one who pees the bed is dry at night, which makes the mom even more frustrated.

I would love some suggestions to give her and her mama to help this poor kiddo out. Any ideas?

[luvmybaby333]

If it's a constant issue, I would think that having her wear bed-wetting underwear could be helpful. I'm not sure why the mother hasn't bought her some Goodnights or something. I imagine that soiling her bedding every night is frustrating for the girl, as well.

[Pumpkin_Pie]

Her mom was buying her Goodnights, but says that they are too expensive to buy all the time. She also shares a bed with her younger sister and her mom said that her sister has a rash on her arm from the urine. One other sister also shares the room with the two younger ones, but not the same bed. I wanted to suggest an alarm, but I am not sure that would work as it would wake up all three girls.

[LynnS6]

Do you know anyone who can sew? They could relatively easily make a cloth alternative to the goodnights (which are quite expensive). One where they could insert a couple of prefolds would be nice.

The other thing is to get a waterproof cover. Maybe they can set it up so that only the child who wets lays on it.

Some kids wet when they're on dairy, so you could suggest cutting out dairy.

But really, it's a matter of time and maturity, and you have to get mom to understand that. (Our ds was dairy free and still wet until 8.)

[carmel23]

Her mom needs to understand that this is just like any other medical condition, and she needs to invest in good nights, or an alternative. Maybe:

These look great: http://naturalbaby.stores.yahoo.net/bedwetterpants.html

I would hate to do a full load of laundry every night, and it has to be terrible to sleep that way for the poor girl!

If her daughter needed an allergy medication would she not want to buy that because it was expensive? Its kind of the same thing, if she thinks about it that way.

[Pumpkin_Pie]

Originally Posted by LynnS6

Do you know anyone who can sew? They could relatively easily make a cloth alternative to the goodnights (which are quite expensive). One where they could insert a couple of prefolds would be nice.

The other thing is to get a waterproof cover. Maybe they can set it up so that only the child who wets lays on it.

Some kids wet when they're on dairy, so you could suggest cutting out dairy.

But really, it's a matter of time and maturity, and you have to get mom to understand that. (Our ds was dairy free and still wet until 8.)

I can sew, and I actually made a ton of cloth dipes for DS when he was a baby, and I still have a lot of leftover PUL. Do you know of a pattern for a pull up style of dipe? Can I just snag a pair of her underwear and use that as a pattern? I think she would wear them if it would help. Washing a pair of cloth pull-ups would be much less stressful than washing all of the bedding. I have a ton of microfiber inserts that she could use too. They absorb a ton and are pretty small to stuff in.

Hmmm... Going to have to work on that today, thanks so much for the idea!

[Pumpkin_Pie]

Originally Posted by carmel23

Her mom needs to understand that this is just like any other medical condition, and she needs to invest in good nights, or an alternative. Maybe:

These look great: http://naturalbaby.stores.yahoo.net/bedwetterpants.html

I would hate to do a full load of laundry every night, and it has to be terrible to sleep that way for the poor girl!

If her daughter needed an allergy medication would she not want to buy that because it was expensive? Its kind of the same thing, if she thinks about it that way.

I completely agree that mom needs to understand that it is absolutely not her daughter's fault, and I was stunned when she humiliated her like that. I did talk to her later about it and said that it really wasn't her fault. Her mom is extremely frustrated, and with her washing machine broken, she is so sick of asking neighbors to do the laundry for her with needing to wash all of the bedding every night. Not that it justifies her behavior in any way for one single second, but I can see how she is frustrated.

I am definitely going to talk to the daughter today about sewing some bedwetter pants like the ones above. I think she will be super excited about them. Now to figure out how to make them actually hold all of the pee.

Actually if they end up working for her, I think I may make some for DS too. He is dry during the day, but nearly always wets at night and has lately been peeing through the pull-ups we have at night.

[LauraN]

Just wanted to pipe up about food intolerances as the culprit. If my son (8) has caffeine or MSG wthin about 4 hours of bedtime he also wets. We cut out dairy for a while, as that's a common culprit, but that turned out not to be the problem. Another common bed-wetting food is wheat.
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[Pumpkin_Pie]

So I sewed her a night time pull-up that is sort of a pocket dipe. It has elastic at the waist and legs like regular underwear, but it is quite a bit bigger and has a pocket inside to stuff absorbent towels or whatever inside. I put two toddler prefolds in there and it is really big and bulky. She thought it was a little uncomfortable because of all of the stuffing, but I realized that all of my microfiber inserts are all loaned out to a friend. Not sure if two prefolds is overkill, but I figured it would be good insurance. Hoping it works for her! She was SUPER excited about it and is definitely going to try it and report back to me on how her night went tomorrow morning. If it works, I am going to make her a few more so she has a few days worth.

I don't know if it would even be possible to address dietary issues with her. Her mama is from Africa and I could see the language barrier being pretty tough when talking about it. The whole family tends to eat about 50% traditional African food and 50% American crap. It would be pretty much impossible to ask her to not eat the crap. They sort of see it as treats that they are able to have now that they live here and not in the jungle in the Congo (literally where they moved from about 7 years ago). Her mama is willing to wait it out and has said she won't mention it again, especially if these pull-ups work.

[annettemarie]

I don't have much in the way of practical advice, but I wanted to pop in and say I think you're awesome for helping her with this. She's lucky to have you!

[Pumpkin_Pie]

Update: It worked!

She reported in this morning saying that she had an accident last night and the pull-up contained everything and her bed was completely dry!

Her mama's washing machine is broken, so I said I would wash it for her, and when I pulled out the two prefolds, they were really only slightly damp, so I am going to only stuff it with one for her for tonight when I bring it back over. I sort of wish I had washed it earlier so I could hang it on the line in the sunshine, but at least she will be protected for tonight. I am definitely going to make her a few more so she can go a few days in between washing loads.

Yippee!

[LynnS6]

You are an awesome neighbor!!

[meemee]

what a wonderful friend you are. i agree.

also i would just let her wear the two prefolds for a week and then see what she needs. she might have had an unusually dry night. for the amount of pee to give her sister a rash must be a lot. i cant imagine her mom washing everything just coz it was a little damp.

perhaps she didnt drink much last evening.

but hey i am celebrating right there with ya.