Single Parent Chit-Chat

[simplemama32]

No offense to anyone at all...I love this forum, but I just need a break from all the divorce, custody, XH talk , especially since I'm already dealing with it 24/7 (or it feels that way sometimes!).

So, how are you? How are the kids? Anything else exciting going on in your life?

I feel like I'm starting to come into my own a bit more as a single mom, as far as juggling work and caring for DS and taking time for myself. I took Susannah Conway's Unravelling course recently (totally great, btw!!), and a friend has taught me the basics of knitting, so I'm looking forward to making an attempt at something handmade for the holidays. Also thinking about going to church for the first time in years...

I'm *really* enjoying DS these days...he's almost 2.5 yrs., and he is quite the little personality. This age is so adorable...very trying on my patience much of the time, but adorable.

How about you?

[Super~Single~Mama]

I'm doing pretty good - I feel like I should be majorly stressed out, but I'm just not. Yet.

DS is great - he's adorable and fun, and trying my patience all the time. We just started working on nightweaning (I have 14credits in law school starting this week, and then the bar exam coming up in Feb!) and he doesn't like it, but he'll be alright.

I think most of my classes are going to be absolutely AWESOME this semester, so I'm really excited about them - but its also going to be tons of work.

I'm also starting my job search so thats going to be exhausting. I'm terrified I won't find anything, but hey, theres always starbucks right?

I love knitting, and I can't wait till I have the time and patience to start again. Not to mention my ds would love it too - especially the unraveling of the balls of yarn

Great idea for a thread btw!

[single_cj]

I'm hanging in there, too! Starting a job and day-care search myself! I don't know if I'll find anything local in my 'old' field, but there's always Wal*Mart, right?



I actually DID just join a church last week! I was raised Catholic, but don't really want to go back to it. I started going to a Methodist church a few months ago & joined this last week. It's been really nice coming "back to the fold" after decades away!

My two are at such great, though trying, ages. DD (4) is REALLY pushing limits and DS (almost 2) is such a ham, I love it.

[simplemama32]

Thyra, it sounds like you have a full plate! What type of law do you want to go into?
GL with the nightweaning. I am going to do that with DS pretty soon...the thought of it intimidates the heck out of me, so I just keep putting it off!

Re the knitting...yeah, ds *loves* the yarn. I usually try to get a little knitting done after he's asleep, and one night I was so tired, I failed to put everything up before I went to bed. He got out of bed before I did the next morning, and was simply *thrilled* to rummage through everything. Imagine being barely awake and seeing a pair of rather large knitting needles coming at you...eek! Luckily no damage was done, to ds, me, or my work-in-progress.

cj -- Re the church...that is really encouraging to hear you say that. I grew up mostly Methodist, but really like what I've heard and seen about our local Episcopalian church. It's been so long since I've been around any church, though, I feel like I want to just sneak in a side door and hide in a corner.

to you both on the job hunt!

[Halfasianmomma]

what a nice and refreshing thread.

AFM, I'm (secretely) looking for a job in teaching to get me far far away from working in office. The money and insurance are good, but it's so boring and I've been having so many health problems due to being seated for 8 hours a day...I really need a change.

So...I have a job interview tomorrow with the principal of a lovely elementary school that's REALLY far away from where I live now. EEK! Never taught elementary....We'll see what comes of it.

I applied to several school boards and some private schools as well to try my luck there.

The plan is
a) start teaching this year and then after I've gotten used to the workload (and after DD is a bit older), go to complete a M.A or M.Ed....and of course, have summers off when DD is of school age.
b) stay working in the firm I'm at now for another year, try not to go crazy, stash money away like crazy, and take distance ed courses until the next school year...and hope to god I can find a full-time teaching job then.

DD is 2 right now, and to be honest, I'm struggling with the tantrums and impatience. It's also very nice to see her developping at an astounding rate. Who knew that 2 year old could know a bunch of letters and numbers already?

I also started knitting again, but only on the bus on the way to/from work, or after DD is asleep. She won't let me knit if she's awake...super grabby toddler.

Oyah, and I'm splurging on myself for my bday present: custom made Argentine tango shoes, made in Buenos Aires. The last time I bought shoes was 7 years ago!!!

[Super~Single~Mama]

Originally Posted by simplemama32

Thyra, it sounds like you have a full plate! What type of law do you want to go into?
GL with the nightweaning. I am going to do that with DS pretty soon...the thought of it intimidates the heck out of me, so I just keep putting it off!

Re the knitting...yeah, ds *loves* the yarn. I usually try to get a little knitting done after he's asleep, and one night I was so tired, I failed to put everything up before I went to bed. He got out of bed before I did the next morning, and was simply *thrilled* to rummage through everything. Imagine being barely awake and seeing a pair of rather large knitting needles coming at you...eek! Luckily no damage was done, to ds, me, or my work-in-progress.


to you both on the job hunt!

"A full plate" doesn't ever BEGIN to describe what my life is going to be like for the next 5-6months! Everything listed above is JUST school related - I have my custody trial coming up in mid-September, and loads of prep coming up to go with that as well! But hopefully once thats over things will get easier - but then I'm going to have school work to make up - eek! Hopefully it goes by fast.

So, I'm hoping its not as bad as I'm afraid it will be, but I'm not too optimistic about that.

And, I have no clue what type of law I want to do. When I graduate I will have some knowledge about family law (duh), criminal law, special education law, prisoners rights, international womens human rights, community economic development, and a few others. Hopefully someone in one of those types of law will want to hire me! LOL! I'm pretty open about everything right now, since the immediate goal is to put food on mine and DS's plate, and a roof over our heads - everything after that is secondary.

HAM - Good luck on your interview!! Teaching sounds like so much fun!

[simplemama32]

HAM -- Good luck with your interview!

And tango shoes -- woo woo! They just sound beautiful.

[simplemama32]

Originally Posted by thyra

"A full plate" doesn't ever BEGIN to describe what my life is going to be like for the next 5-6months! Everything listed above is JUST school related - I have my custody trial coming up in mid-September, and loads of prep coming up to go with that as well! But hopefully once thats over things will get easier - but then I'm going to have school work to make up - eek! Hopefully it goes by fast.

So, I'm hoping its not as bad as I'm afraid it will be, but I'm not too optimistic about that.

And, I have no clue what type of law I want to do. When I graduate I will have some knowledge about family law (duh), criminal law, special education law, prisoners rights, international womens human rights, community economic development, and a few others. Hopefully someone in one of those types of law will want to hire me! LOL! I'm pretty open about everything right now, since the immediate goal is to put food on mine and DS's plate, and a roof over our heads - everything after that is secondary.

Egads... and a little bit of

[Super~Single~Mama]

Originally Posted by simplemama32

HAM -- Good luck with your interview!

And tango shoes -- woo woo! They just sound beautiful.

Yeah, I think we may need to see some pics of those when you get them!

[Halfasianmomma]

Originally Posted by thyra

Yeah, I think we may need to see some pics of those when you get them!

Lol...it's a LONG TERM project (i.e. 6 to 8 weeks for delivery), but I'll def. post some pics for you mamas

[doubledutch]

fun!

i've only been officially doing this single mama thing for a little while, but my partner wasn't much of one, so i'm actually finding this easier ftmp, and my boys are doing awesome. they are 3 and almost 5.

i've been doing lots of knitting. my boys "help" by poking extra needles through extra balls of yarn. i've been meaning to teach them to finger knit, but first i have to learn, myself.

i'm also making them each a quilt. we cosleep and i'm so ready for them to move to their own beds! not all the time, but ready for the transition to begin soon, once we are a bit more settled into our new life.

dating is a ways off, but is sometimes on my mind. i feel reasonably attractive, but i think if i got into a bit better shape, i would be more confident, and of course i would just *feel* better (more energy, etc). it's in the back of my mind. i know so many hot single men, it's ridiculous.

i've had a weird summer because of this whole separation/divorce deal. i've stepped back from things i've been involved with, and in some cases i'm eager to get back to it . . . and in one other (volunteer deal) i'm not. i don't want to just bale on it, but my heart's not really in it. it's not a major time commitment, just one block of a few hours, one day per month. i don't know what to do about that. i might go temporarily inactive for six months or something, to see if someone can take my place or at least share my role with me.

this is a great idea for a thread. i've enjoyed hearing more about your regular lives.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Originally Posted by doubledutch

dating is a ways off, but is sometimes on my mind. i feel reasonably attractive, but i think if i got into a bit better shape, i would be more confident, and of course i would just *feel* better (more energy, etc). it's in the back of my mind. i know so many hot single men, it's ridiculous.

i've had a weird summer because of this whole separation/divorce deal. i've stepped back from things i've been involved with, and in some cases i'm eager to get back to it . . . and in one other (volunteer deal) i'm not. i don't want to just bale on it, but my heart's not really in it. it's not a major time commitment, just one block of a few hours, one day per month. i don't know what to do about that. i might go temporarily inactive for six months or something, to see if someone can take my place or at least share my role with me.

this is a great idea for a thread. i've enjoyed hearing more about your regular lives.

Dating is probably a ways off for me too, but uh, where do you find hot single men? I want HOT SINGLE MEN!!!! Come on, I live in NYC, they shouldn't be too hard to find right???

[simplemama32]

Originally Posted by doubledutch

dating is a ways off, but is sometimes on my mind. i feel reasonably attractive, but i think if i got into a bit better shape, i would be more confident, and of course i would just *feel* better (more energy, etc). it's in the back of my mind. i know so many hot single men, it's ridiculous.

Yeah, share the love, dd! Don't keep them all for yourself.

Not that I want anything to do with a man anytime soon... *sigh*

I hear you, though, about wanting to get into better shape. I'm going to splurge on a weighted hula-hoop sometime soon...I've seen a ton of stuff about hooping online lately, and it looks like fun. I need something to make me smile. A co-worker is trying to talk me into taking a belly-dancing class with her, too.

[Theia]

I want to get myself into a physical class of some sort. I need to get myself down to the local Y so that I could workout and DD could be in childcare onsite.

Good luck to those with job searches!

I don't like to multi-quote so I don't mean to ignore anyone. In fact I am addicted to the quick reply box.

DD did the cutest thing yesterday morning. I had woken up and was watching her wake up for about 5 minutes. She was making faces and stuff. Then when she finally opened her eyes, she sat up all sleepy eyed and said, "I do like Green Eggs and Ham." I think she yawned and then added, "Thank you Sam I Am."

[Chantelle691]

Love this thread.

I'm winding up the summer with my dd, she's starting 4th grade next week, and I go back to my job teaching 6th grade. So then it allllll begins again, dance, girl scouts, fall ball, gymnastics, etc. And mama driving everywhere. lol.

I love my summers. I'm so sorry to see this one go!

And hot single men - ahh, I could use one of those!

[Everrgreen]

Hello!

I'm doing well at the moment. Things are a bit unorganized for me, but I'm trying. I'm preparing for a move to be closer to friends and to the school I want to apply to for next year. I'm both excited and nervous about going back to school! It should be good though. I'm hoping to be moved by the end of September.

My DS is wonderful and exhausting. I have been a SAHM to him since he was born and I'm hoping to continue that for the next year until I start school. I may see if I can do some home daycare once I'm settled in my new city. Or some other home-based job. I'm just not sure my CS/SS will be enough.

I would also love to nightwean, but it's proving to be difficult and so I keep putting it off as well!

As for dating, I do sort of daydream about it. But I'm nervous about it. I'm hoping to get more involved in non-parenting things once I'm settled in my new city, so maybe I'll meet somebody

[RollerCoasterMama]

Hello! Busy busy! Just got back from a week in the woods with DS and the cat (we rented a cabin so far north it was sweater weather all week---TOTALLY AWESOME!!). On the way home we picked up our new kitten from the breeder. And my fall online classes started up...these are the hard-core weed-em-out classes. But then, I've aced everything since law school, so I ought to be ok. OH...and on top of that, next month some time I'm going to be trying to get pregnant for a couple that can't carry their own baby. Things are a little crazy. But it's a good crazy. And I'm excited to get to be pregnant again (and not to have to deal with newborn induced sleep deprivation--though I might need to pump at night for a while).

I'm thinking next semester I should probably just take one class...whatcha think?

OH! And I'm officially going to the SSN office and the DMV on Friday to get my name changed. That's gonna be a whole weird thing. It's going to take some getting used to. That name is my childhood. But I want to reclaim it.

I have to laugh because the people around me seem to think that I'm overloading...but they need to understand that none of this is impulse. I'm simply constructing the life I didn't have the engery/resources to have before. It looks quick, but it's highly thought out!

[josybear]

i think it's kind of awesome that practically everyone on here knits.

i know i hardly ever post on this forum, but i consider it to be my 'home' at mdc and i try to keep relatively up to date on your various sagas.

things are good here. i start back at school in mid september and until then i have nothing noteworthy going on. of course, i have no income until late september, but just having time is wonderful. i've been cooking for the coming semester, deep cleaning, painting my bedroom, doing yoga, volunteering, napping and even getting back into art. it's been ten years since i've had the physical, emotional and spiritual space to do art, so this is huge for me.

soon, though, i'm starting my most intense school year yet. i'm doing all my math & science requirements at once, and those subjects are not my forte. the good news is that i have three semesters of classes left. that means i'll be done with textbooks and assignments in july of next year. then i'll have two semesters of practicum and i'll have my bsw.
of course, i'm going to grad school after this because i'm a glutton for punishment, but i try not to think about that when i'm reflecting on how soon i'll be done school.

anyways, that's me right now. great thread!

[meemee]

Originally Posted by josybear

i think it's kind of awesome that practically everyone on here knits.

- except me

i can knit and crochet but i am a 'live in the head' kinda person so after a while i lose all interest in hands on stuff like the half crochet sweater speaks from the closet.

this summer was a killer - after summer school. i had a v. v. v. intense spring and summer school load. and suddenly i went from a LOT of work to NOTHING. i am horrible with too much time on my hand. a few hours i love. i did have home stuff to do but i hate, hate organising stuff on my own.

so now that i am back at campus i am a HAPPY camper. i have a wonderful again intense load of classes that are all somehow interconnected without meaning to be so. so its a WONDERFUL time for me. i really enjoy academics. and what's wonderful is that for some reason i have hit the jackpot with great proffs who try to make us think - not just memorise facts.

i also discovered what a nerd i really am. how i struggle with small talk. and how hard it is to be in a roomfull of strangers and be 'boring'. i take things too seriously and dont get the joke. i also dont see the point in some of the conversations people have. i prefer having 'subjects' to talk about and find my likes are not popular amongst the general public so... there ya go. what that means is i come out as a doo gooder because i know too much.

i am kinda getting tired of the teen crowd at community college level adn really long for some intellectual stimulation. i cant wait for the day i start grad school which is still ways to go. i have joined a meetup atheists group to figure out their point of view. i went for one of their big meetings, and now am going to go to a smaller one to ask more about ideologies. i am not an atheist myself.

its a full moon night. i hope this child of mine can fall asleep soon. i plan to sit in the backyard and enjoy teh cool night air with the full moon. the moon means sooo much to me. i see it and think how its position has been the first inroads of man into science - the mayans.

i do a lot of voluntary work. this saturday i am helping at hte local organic farm in the kitchen. this is my first time i am in charge of cooking a meal for 30+ some people. dd and i really enjoy that. sometimes we have to go harvest from the fields directly in case there is not much left over veggies. i love the challenge of getting there and discovering what i can cook. instead of showing up there with a fixed menu.

sunday i will be volunteering at our native museum. i have to do some research on some shells and create an education program which i might lead. i am excited about that because i will be meeting a few archaeologists to get some more lead.

if a hot single man walked into my life right now i dont know where i would fit him in my life. on top of that i really want to focus on my studies and dont want 'waste' my grades on 'thoughts and dreams'. there are lots of single men around but none of their minds interest me. so they are hot and my friends think i am crazy but i have nothing in common with them.

simplemama what a GREAT IDEA for a thread.

[Learning_Mum]

Well, I'm going to be Debbie Downer!

Things have been tough here the last couple of weeks. Both boys have been sick and now I'm pretty sure that DS2 is working on his molars. He has been very clingy, and moany and just plain hard work! Also I'm really sick of bedtimes!

I was going to start belly dancing again today, but the class got cancelled today so that sucked.

DS1 starts school next week! That's exciting! I'm hoping that he's going to be OK. There are already a couple of his friends in his class so I think that will help.

I have spent some time decluttering recently which means that house has been staying clean and tidy which is super awesome! I'm going to sort out stuff that I can sell too (like the cot, change table etc) which will help bring in a bit of extra money.

DS2 has stopped sleeping through the night again, which means I'm so tired. I think that's really not helping anything at the moment!