School Phobia?

[Mothernature]

This is the first week of first grade and it is beginning to look like a repeat of last year. My little guy just puts on the breaks when we get to school and refuses to go inside. If I walk him in he insists that I stay with him. By insist, I mean that he gets very upset when I walk away and he follows me. When I firmly tell him that I have to leave and he has to stay, he gets agitated and continues to follow me.

Last year, he ran away from school and C.O.P.E.S. had to be called to evaluate him. By the time they got there he was fine, but he ended up getting a 3 day "vacation" because of it (in KINDERGARTEN!)

I've tried being sensitive, firm and everything in between. His school is willing to work with me on this, but nothing we've tried seems to work. Counseling was an even bigger disaster. I want him to enjoy school, learn and have fun, but he makes our mornings absolutely miserable. He has friends and his teacher is wonderful. Has anyone else dealt with this behavior?

[jazzharmony]

Did this last the entire K year? Do his teachers say there is any time during the day during which he seems happy? What details are they giving you about his day? Does he seem like he doesn't want to open up about his feelings or do you think he has difficulty articulating them?

[Linda on the move]

I have a child with autism and a social anxiety disorder. What you describe would be completely normal for her. It seems a bit over the top for a neuro typical kid. Are you sure there isn't anything going on? Does he have any sensory issues? Has he had a full eval? Are there any other red flags?

My advice is to come up with a plan with the school and just stick to it. Trying to be firm and be nice and every thing inbetween *may* have just made things worse for him because consistancy is helpful in moving past things like this. If you are absolutly sure there is nothing going (emotionally, neurologically, socially) then talk to your contact point at the school and make a plan.

For example, you walk him to the school counselors office and leave him there in her care, and she walks him to class after he has calmed down. He needs to be handed off to a specific person who can hold his hand and comfort him while you leave. A person who isn't also responbile for 25 other children at the same time is most likely best.