Ideas for other things to do besides self injure?

[muldey]

I'm really struggling right now,and need some ideas.I've done the rubber bands,the ice,doesn't help.I don't think drawing red lines will help either.What has worked for you?I'm in therapy but it's just not doing it anymore.I'm afraid I'm going to slip up and I don't want to.My meds aren't helping either,except making me very tired.

[Mackenzie]

Couldnt read without replying. I wish I had answers or suggestions for you....

[Vancouver Mommy]

I'm also so sorry you're having a tough time. I don't have any advice, but earlier today I noticed a "mamas in recovery" thread. Maybe you could check that out and get some support. Hugs.

http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1219631

[Oubliette8]

Can you call your therapist when you feel like cutting? Mine is pretty helpful at those times. Other things that sometimes work for me, sometimes I write whatever terrible things I'm thinking about myself over my body in marker. Its not pretty or nice, but it also doesn't involve physical injury. Sometimes I'll go for a very long drive. You can't cut while you're driving, and I leave my implements at home. Sometimes it takes a few hours of going nowhere, but it helps. When its really bad, I'll take a unisom, which makes me very tired and tends to calm me. Usually when I wake up, the urge has passed. Your doctor might be able to prescribe a prn that has a similar effect. Would drawing your feelings help? I've tried that with some success. Sometimes its quite violent and graphic, and often the paper ends up shredded in the creative process, but better the paper than me. What about being near people? Would it help if someone sat with you?

[GoBecGo]

Things that have helped me:

Doing nice things to myself, so self-massage (my feet usually, because you can press hard and it's only good) or washing my hair and doing a scalp massage, going for a run, lifting weights, massaging someone i love (i massaged XP, because i really liked him then and didn't want to hurt him, but got a lot of touch-contact doing it which somewhat took the edge off wanting to hurt myself). Groom a horse. Brush a dog. Wrote a list of all the reasons i shouldn't hurt myself. Screaming into a pillow. Writing an email (or a letter, i liked the fastness typing offers) to the thing i'm angry/sad about telling IT why i'm not going to hurt ME over IT.

Sometimes, later on, when i hadn't done it for months, i would sit still in a chair and tell myself "you're NOT going to do that, so what ARE you going to do" and forced myself to breathe slowly and examine what had caused the feelings and process that properly instead of trying to bruise through it.

[muldey]

Thanks so much.I will try the things suggested.I've just been having such a tough time lately and I need some sort of release but I don't want to go back to my old ways.I could call my therapist but I never want to bother anyone,especially late at night when I feel this way.I really don't have anyone else.My ex doesn't care,he refuses to even talk about it.My parents don't know.I feel so alone ,even in my parenting decisions.Everyone is constantly questioning me and I just can't take it anymore.I posted somewhere else looking for support,a place especially for self injurers,and all I got was how wrong I am for my parenting.I won't go back there.I'll stay here where I am understood.Thanks again.

[NewMaMaZenLovin]

I have only had the urge to go back to my old ways" twice during my pregnancy and was able to avoid them thank god but one thing I would do before I was pregnant was I would get a saftey pin or a needle and pull it across my skin to get the sensation but not the cut. I dont advocate for how healthy this is in healing but it helped. Im becoming much more aware of myself psychologically and im studying birth trauma and pre/perinatal psychology. Im intrested to know what having the mother experience feeling of wanting to hurt herself does to the baby's psyche. Im finding that alot of problems I have had began at my conception and the circumstances involving my development and birth. awe...... hugs mamas!

[danipoppins]

Originally Posted by muldey

I could call my therapist but I never want to bother anyone,especially late at night when I feel this way.I really don't have anyone else.My ex doesn't care,he refuses to even talk about it.My parents don't know.I feel so alone ,even in my parenting decisions.Everyone is constantly questioning me and I just can't take it anymore.

It is a HUGE strength that you haven't gone 'back' and that you are seeking help from the resources you have - please give yourself credit, okay mama? I would talk to your therapist about and see if s/he has any suggestions about what you should do at those times, say in the middle of the night, when you feel the urges. There are resources that exist, mental health and crisis hotlines, and they are staffed 24/7 for this very purpose. Of course, each one is different and even within those agencies you're going to find some folks are more helpful than others, but that is why they're there. Do you have any safe person in your life you can talk to?

I'm sorry that your parenting is being questioned - it's so disheartening when you feel with all of your being that you're doing the right thing for your children only to have it questioned over and over. Try to remember that at the end of the day, you are the only one who has to answer to your children for the way they were parented. "Well meaning" aunts, grandmas, 'friends' and others are not on your front line of parenting, they don't know your children the way you do and they are the ones responsible for your children - you are.

Do what you need to do to take care of yourself... please try to let go of the not wanting to 'bother' anyone. This is a huge barrier that I'm working on myself but in reality, very few people are bothered by someone reaching out for help and if they are, they aren't worth having in your life anyway, yk?

[A&A]

Are you taking a B-vitamin supplement? That has helped my mental health.