Managing 2.5 year-old and newborn/6 week old (x-posted in Toddler forum)

[slgt]

We have 2 daughters, 2.5 and 6 weeks. We are in a very fortunate situation right now that I have 12 full weeks of maternity leave and my husband is a SAHD, so we are having a really blessed time adjusting to our new family.

I'm trying to give him several hours a day to work on projects around the house, but here it is - I'm having a hard time figuring out how to manage both girls at once. DD#2 of course is in arms, and is often not thrilled with being in a sling/moby/bjorn (and still too small for the angelpack). DD#1 is of course rather demanding of time. I feel like all I'm capable of doing with both is reading books, coloring, going for walks, or going out to places where DD#1 can be more self-entertained (e.g. playground, playgroup).

When I try to do a morning at home with both, I'm exhausted & overwhelmed, and it shows as DD#1's behaviour deteriorates as the morning goes on. I feel like DD#2 is just along for the ride, and I'm just sort of carting her around to whatever DD#1 is doing, and she's not getting much 1:1 time. I end up feeling like I'm not being a very good Mom to either girl - and forget about being an effective wife and taking care of the house. Gack! How do I do this?!?!?!?!?

I know thousands of people do this - what tips, tricks, advice to you have for helping things go more smoothly? I know it will get easier and harder, but I'd love to have some experience under my belt so that I can pass some wisdom on to DH when he (gulp) is a SAHD dad to 2 once i go back to work! And should I give up on getting things done around the house until DD#2 is older? Will all of this change a lot once she's 3-4 months old and is more entertained by watching the world go on around her and playing a little bit?

[jenfl]

Not a lot of advice; I have a 3 year old and a nearly-5 month old and we're just stumbling through. But I had to giggle when I saw this:

Will all of this change a lot once she's 3-4 months old and is more entertained by watching the world go on around her and playing a little bit?

because we're at that point, but it just means that DS is grabbing everything I'm trying to do with DD!

[confustication]

It worked best for us (our younger two are closer in age though, at 14 months apart) to actually divide and conquer. We would take turns each doing one on one with the little guys and that helped a great deal as we were finding our way.

The big shift happened for us once our youngest was sitting well on his own and becoming mobile. Now that he's all over the place, they actually play really well doing parallel activities.

It began to get easier at about 6 weeks though as that intense newborn stage was changing.

[snoopy5386]

I think it is fine for your 6 week old to be along for the ride, they don't need much else at this point. And coloring, reading books and going for walks together or the park, playground sounds just about perfect for a 2.5 year old. You are doing great, a heck of a lot better than I was at that stage and I've got a 4 year old, not a 2.5 year old.