How to get 5 week old to take a nap?

[LittleBirdy]

Yes, I'm serious. DS sleeps like a champ at night, waking a few times to nurse and then right back to sleep... has slept for 2-3 hour stretches at night since birth and now starting to do longer stretches, 4 or 5 hours at a time. Goes down around 9:30 and up around 7 or 8.

However, he fights sleep during the day. I know he's tired. He yawns and gets drowsy. But he won't take a nap other than maybe a 10 minute cat nap after nursing. On the days where he DOES nap, he'll fall asleep around lunch time for at least 2 hours and then in the evenings he is a happy baby, just like he is in the mornings. When he DOESN'T nap, he screams all afternoon and doesn't want to do anything but nurse. Doesn't want to be held and rocked, even. Just nurse. And then we move into his usual cluster feeding before bed which means he's at the breast from about 3 p.m. until 9 p.m. or so.

I've tried nursing him down for a nap, the baby swing, and wearing him (which is the most reliable method so far). What am I doing wrong? I didn't know a newborn could fight sleep like that!

Also, we do a little bedtime routine of bath, lotion/massage, jammies and then I nurse him as long as I need to for him to go to sleep. Doesn't matter what time I start the routine, he doesn't nod off until 9:30. Can his internal clock be that sharp?

Would welcome any advice. I would be fine if he didn't nap all day and was happy but the screeching in the afternoon kills me - not just crying but that full on red faced screaming where he sounds like he's losing his voice. Poor guy makes me feel like i've failed him somehow

[Knitting Mama]

Can you nurse him while wearing him? What about swaddling? That's about the only reliable way for me to get Cecilia to sleep outside of my arms, and even then she will only sleep in the swing for long periods of time. But to be completely honest, it wasn't until she was over 2 months old that she began sleeping in the swing reliably, so you may just have to wait this out and keep trying new methods. But definitely try the swaddle if you haven't already.

[Hannah32]

Do you take a quick walk up and down the street when you wear him for a nap? That worked for me. It got him into a deeper sleep, then he naps for an hour or longer.

[LittleBirdy]

Originally Posted by Hannah32

Do you take a quick walk up and down the street when you wear him for a nap? That worked for me. It got him into a deeper sleep, then he naps for an hour or longer.

nak

i usually try to but here's the latest complication... 90 degrees outside and we have no ac. i worry about him/me overheating. if he doesn't have a nap by 2 pm today i think i'm just going to go walk the mall for a few hours. at least he'll sleep. too bad they closed the bookstore there

[KSDoulaMama]

First of all, he's still very young and he is probably still getting used to being on the OUTSIDE of you, and that's hard! It is totally normal to take some time getting used to each other and learning what works and what doesn't.

My babe is super easygoing, but it has helped me with other babies (I was a nanny and postpartum doula for years) to have a mini-bedtime routine at nap time. The second we saw a yawn, eye rub or a tired-sounding fuss we'd head to a quiet bedroom, turn on a fan, shut the blinds, swaddle the baby, and rock/nurse/pacifier/whatever. If they would start really fighting it we'd stop trying and go back in in 20 minutes or so. It's also essential to make sure they are not overtired to start with, because that'll definitely make babies fight sleep more! In the morning, even if it seems like he just woke up, if he shows any tired signs whatsoever, do the routine. You've gotta show him that sleep is a NICE thing.

Some babies do have a more difficult temperament when it comes to sleep though, and it sounds like you've got one on your hands. Good luck!

[P.J.]

Originally Posted by KSDoulaMama

First of all, he's still very young and he is probably still getting used to being on the OUTSIDE of you, and that's hard! It is totally normal to take some time getting used to each other and learning what works and what doesn't.

My babe is super easygoing, but it has helped me with other babies (I was a nanny and postpartum doula for years) to have a mini-bedtime routine at nap time. The second we saw a yawn, eye rub or a tired-sounding fuss we'd head to a quiet bedroom, turn on a fan, shut the blinds, swaddle the baby, and rock/nurse/pacifier/whatever. If they would start really fighting it we'd stop trying and go back in in 20 minutes or so. It's also essential to make sure they are not overtired to start with, because that'll definitely make babies fight sleep more! In the morning, even if it seems like he just woke up, if he shows any tired signs whatsoever, do the routine. You've gotta show him that sleep is a NICE thing.

Some babies do have a more difficult temperament when it comes to sleep though, and it sounds like you've got one on your hands. Good luck!

^^^That's about exactly what I was going to say ~ except my baby is not easygoing, is one of those who also fights naps yet sleeps well at night. He's now 3 months and it took until he was about 2 months at least for his daytime sleep to start to regulate, and for us to figure out how important sleeptime routines are. What I do is close all the blinds and sit in the glider and nurse and rock and sing until he's sleepy, then carefully take him into the bed, swaddle him, and if he wakes up then lay there and nurse him a bit more until he falls asleep. Some babies also fall asleep and sleep longer with white noise like a fan, AC, radio static, or white noise/nature sounds machine. I would try getting a solid routine in place, even if it doesn't seem to work or takes forever, and I reckon that within the next couple months he will start to fall asleep easier and nap more regularly. It does take persistence and loads of patience, but hang in there and it will improve.

The screaming also gets better with age ~ our baby was colicky and still does the evening screaming routine on occasion, but by 8 weeks we started to see a lot of improvement with that. With most babies it has to do with overstimulation, as their little baby brains cannot filter out all the input like ours can, plus it's all so new. This then relates to fighting sleep in that once they're over the limit they just fight and fight even though they're really tired. Again the key for us was calming down, slowing down, dimming the lights and just relaxing (hard to do with the screaming I know but it's important you stay as calm as possible). Even if he keeps screaming and doesn't fall asleep, he needs to have the stimulation turned off and to give the space to rest and sleep. The crying will get less with time, though, just by his getting more used to this life and all the input it brings. Good luck!

[LittleBirdy]

Thanks for all the responses so far. It's funny KSDoulaMama & PJ, while you were here posting away I was upstairs in a panic trying to dig out my "Baby Sound Spa" that I got as a gift and thought was lame. We put on the "rain" setting, swaddled, rocked & nursed. He slept on me but not deeply, and when he started to really wake up I figured it was all over. Carried him downstairs and he was awake but floppy like a rag doll... put him in the baby swing and he is sleeping for now.

I think I was so terrified of him getting days & nights confused that it never occurred to me to do a naptime routine when he started to get tired. I think I just assumed he would sleep when he got tired - yeah right.

I swear the only thing that keeps me sane when I start thinking about how much I have to learn still is the comfort of thinking of all the things I already have

[Abraisme]

I agree with the swaddling and babywearing. Those were the only 2 things that allowed my baby to sleep until she was 7mo old.

[KSDoulaMama]

Originally Posted by LittleBirdy

I swear the only thing that keeps me sane when I start thinking about how much I have to learn still is the comfort of thinking of all the things I already have

It is so early on! How could you have known all of these little things? This is the time that you are supposed to spend learning about each other.