big family, lots of frustrations

[frugalmum]

Anyone kind enough to read this and give ideas-- I would appreciate it!

I have HSed/ had kids in school off and on since they were school aged. Some have only been in school, some have only been homeschooled, and some have done both. I was very unhappy with their last school so did not re-enroll any of them for this academic year. I enrolled them in a correspondence school that gives a curriculum-- I am not following it 100% and mostly enrolled them to have guidelines for the older kids-- I do want them to have accredited diplomas (DS is grade 9).

It would take DD5 about 20 minutes to complete her "work." She will scream for 2 hours about being asked to do a pittance of school work.

DD7 (who is VERY bright) just flat out refuses. Tells me dead pan that she would rather die a slow death than do any more school work. All she wants to do is watch cartoons and play Spore (videogame). Ok, I figure she is burnt out from bad experiences in school, but it would take her at most an hour to do her work-- closer to 40 minutes-- I'm not asking a lot here.

DD 8 will do her work without complaint, but, she is very, very social and misses the company she had at school. She loves being in big crowds, being with her teachers, etc.. This makes me feel guilty, that I am being selfish for keeping her home when I know she loved school.

DD 11 (who very much wants to homeschool) just falls asleep with her face in the textbook . Honestly, you say the words "math" or "english" and her eyes glaze over and she turns a little catatonic. She enjoys sewing and reading novels, and babysits her 2 y.o. sister beautifully. I have thought of just telling her to do those three things throughout the day and not worry about the rest-- but then I feel guilty, like I am being negligent not making sure she can do basic math (which I'm not sure she can do .

DS 14-- who has always homeschooled-- likes to cut corners but does his schoolwork-- he very ardently wants to continue homeschooling. So no real issues there

So the real question is what do I do with DDs 5,7, and 11? I don't have time or energy to handhold, bribe, beg, threaten. I just don't! I would appreciate any ideas at all. tia!!

[shoefairy3]

Sounds like they might need something different. They dont seem to be enjoying their correspondent school. Maybe a different approach altogether?

[frugalmum]

3 of them are not enthused with the correspondence school-- 2 are fine with it. The problem is, if I tell the unenthusiastic three to not worry about it, the remaining two will start a riot!

I am thinking a different approach all together... I am so tired of the academic rat race!!

[lmonter]

Totally feel free to ignore me as need be, but have some of them had time to decompress from public school? It's a fairly different mindset you need to be in from public school to homeschooling I've heard... Some families I know end up needing a good 6-12 months off - basically doing nothing/unschooling to be able to get into their own hs'ing groove.

[shoefairy3]

Originally Posted by lmonter

Totally feel free to ignore me as need be, but have some of them had time to decompress from public school? It's a fairly different mindset you need to be in from public school to homeschooling I've heard... Some families I know end up needing a good 6-12 months off - basically doing nothing/unschooling to be able to get into their own hs'ing groove.

i completely agree

[emilys_mom1]

What about picking a few subjects and do some unit studies with all of them together as a family. There must be some underlining subjects that they all like, as sports, computers, food, etc. Try more of the unschooling methods. How about playing alot of board games with the 5 and 7 yr olds. We do that alot in our house. I'm teaching everyone anatomy and we are starting with the skeletal system, so we are playing skeletons in the closet. We are also playing lots of math games right now. Here are some of our games that we play for school:

Auntie Pasta's Fraction Game
OCEANOPOLY
PLANET QUEST GAME
WORLD CLASS BASKETBALL GAME
Dino Math Tracks Game
GeoSafari Spin USA
Dino- opoly
Horseopoly
Great States Junior
10 Days in Africa Game
Spill Your Guts Anatomy Game
Sum Swamp
Timing It Right Game
Caught in the Web Game
Totally Gross Science Game
Alpha Bug Soup Word Game
Brain Box Discover Dinosaurs
Smithsonian Institution Dig That Dinosaur
Professor Noggins Ancient Civilizations Game
Money Bags Board Game

[frugalmum]

I realized that one of the things that was bugging me is that while they were perfect angels in school-- never complained to their teachers, were always productive, did what was asked of them-- they won't even do a fraction of the same workload when *I* ask it of them. But on the flip side, their teachers were "there" with them all day, while I am so distracted with housework, my 2 year old, cooking, my own stuff generally, that I have not been hands on with them at all. Still-- it seems like they could put in an effort-- I am not asking a lot.

The board games are a good idea! The problem is that my 2 yr old is such high needs, and gets so angry-- screaming and shrieking-- when she sees me "ignoring" her to be with the others, that I end up ignoring everyone else!

[kittie313]

Originally Posted by lmonter

Totally feel free to ignore me as need be, but have some of them had time to decompress from public school? It's a fairly different mindset you need to be in from public school to homeschooling I've heard... Some families I know end up needing a good 6-12 months off - basically doing nothing/unschooling to be able to get into their own hs'ing groove.

Originally Posted by shoefairy3

i completely agree

Yep, I agree too. We didn't take any decompression time before we started hsing last school year (dd1 spent K in ps) but we took it real easy on them to get dd1 used to schooling at home. I'm talking added one subject at a time over the course of a few weeks to be sure we eased into it. Socially, what about a weekly field trip or something for a while? We did that until dd1 no longer had that impossible need to be around others all the time.

[shoefairy3]

and start with a subject they really enjoy

[Lisa1970]

This is very normal.

I cut off all non educational TV and computer games, until 6pm. Then they only get it if they earned it. They have chores as well as the schoolwork. The chores take more work than the school work. This gives them a good work ethic, and encourages them to make less mess in the future.

It has been a fight, I admit. But it only took a week before the kids started starting the day with asking for their schoolwork and their chores.

[Lisa1970]

Also, I would drop the correspondance program for anyone under high school age. That is how I do it.

[kathymuggle]

Originally Posted by Lisa1970

Also, I would drop the correspondance program for anyone under high school age. That is how I do it.

I agree with this.

DS started a correspondance program last year - and it worked well. I don't think it is necessary for the under high school set (well - for the high school set either, but he likes it) - but in your case it is not working, so why bother?

I am going to assume you have allowed for decompression time (and not just summer!) and are not USers.

This is what I would do:

I would work on a weekly flow. Once a week I would round up the children and go to the library - let them pick what they want. I may also do a weekly park day, HS co-op or other such thing.

On a daily basis, I would block out 2 hours in the morning when they are not allowed to use screens. (not for the 14 yr old - he is doing his work and he is too old for this sort of micro-managing) The default will be playing (which is good for them!) or reading (also good). After you have done this for a bit, and they are used to being screen free for 2 hours, I would slowly start introducing some skills -maybe in 15 minute chunks, and one on one if possible. I would also strew some cool stuff for them to play with (learn with) during the 2 hour time block - blocks, play-doh, horrible history books, etc.

A little word on the 11 yr old - my DS took a geography class online last year. I was worried about his writing skills - because he had very little writing skills - but, with a fair bit of hand-holding in the beginning he did more than alright! she may lack basic math, but I genuinely believe there will come a point when she want to learn it. We need basic math to function as adults - she is going to want it. Moreover, if she has aspirations of going to college (and if she does not now, she might in the future) she might willingly work on her math to meet her goals. Patience, mama.

Good luck!

Kathy

[phathui5]

All she wants to do is watch cartoons and play Spore (videogame).

With my kids, they aren't allowed to use anything with a screen if their work for the day isn't done. So if they asked to watch cartoons or play video games, I would just keep going "Sure, when you've done your ______."

[ohiomommy1122]

hugs

[happy1nluv]

hugs on the 2 yr old -- im trying to figure out how to hs w a 1 yr old... i've found a few activities that i can adapt for him... writing letters in shaving cream on a window for the 5 year old, put shaving cream in baggie taped to window (on opp side) for 1 year old, etc...

also... have you tried giving them money challenges? Make math more personal...(If you can count 50 pennies, you can put them in your piggy bank, i hide money - they find - if they can count, they can keep (small change amounts...rarely more than 50-75 cents), etc. ... or wherever she's at... sorry, my oldest is 5).