So Sick in First Tri - Feeling Loss of 'Self'

[Gladiola]

I'm 11 weeks along now & for the past 5, I've been so dreadfully ill, I've been unable to function.

I realized last night I don't even feel like I can remember who I was. I can't remember what it was like to enjoy social outings, getting things done around the house, cooking, etc. I can't even remember what that was like & feel that productive person I always was is no longer me. I can't imagine being that person again.

I realized I haven't maintained my self-identity while being this non-functioning, worthless person for 5 straight weeks.

(Yes, I've tried lots of remedies to feel better physically, but nothing's helping much.)

This has really depressed me. I cried my eyes out for probably a good 30 minutes last night. I'm going to look into seeing a counselor (don't normally.)

Anyone else coping with incapacitating sickness?

[OhioJenna]

I'm in the middle of that right now ... a little over 6 weeks with my 4th. I felt mildly sick all last week, but Monday rolled around, and WHAM!

My husband is stationed in South Korea (he was home in July *wink wink*), and I'm struggling with being so alone, taking care of our 3 kids. Thankfully, my family lives 45 minutes away, and my dad came up to grocery shop for us today.

Nothing in the outside world sounds good. Shopping, driving, eating, taking the kids to the park, even going outside (it's 90 degrees). I feel bad for my 2 boys who are home with me while their sister is at school, because I just can't do much with them.

This too shall pass? ((hugs))

[mom2fussy]

That's me for the whole first trimester & a good part of the 2nd. I'm still not "myself" and I'm 21 weeks!

Have you looked into medicines for the nausea? I assume when you said you've been "ill", that's what you mean. Zofran made a HUGE difference for me - well, being completely non-functioning vs dragging through life (ha, ha). But seriously, I was so sick I was losing weight & unable to do anything. Zofran made all the difference.

You're usually more tired that first trimester than you will be later, and that doesn't help! It DOES get better, so hang in there!

[rockycrop]

I'm 12.5 weeks now and I'm just now coming out of it. It was similar to what you describe. I was pretty depressed, not enjoying anything, just trying to make it through each day (each hour..).

This is my second and it was not like this with my first. I think it was just having to eat constantly and being repulsed by most food. Really all I could think about was "What am I possibly going to eat next?", I didn't have room to think about anything else.

The past couple days have been a night and day difference, I can cook again-which is so huge! I don't have to eat quite as often, so I'm actually able to think about the world around me and myself again. A nice change.

It WILL get better. Hopefully sooner than later for you. I totally know how you feel right now though.

[kaleigh822]

So sorry! That can be horrible, I had a very similar 1st trimester and part of my second. I know depression/fear can make the physical sickness worse so anything you can do to help yourself emotionally will help you all around. Maybe you could take a short walk and get some fresh air, rent some entertaining movies or call a friend. Your body is working hard to nourish this baby and you won't feel like this once your hormones level out. Definitely let your midwife/ Doc know. It will pass!

[gemasita]

I'm 18 weeks and still suffering. I can't do anything I used to do. Can't get out of the house, can't cook, shop, clean, don't like to be around people. I try to save what little energy I have to fake it while working (self-employed). I can't remember what the normal me feels like. I feel a bit like I have a parasite sucking the life out of me, unfortunately. And I don't know if it's going to actually end during the pregnancy. 18 week and no improvement? Might be here to stay.

[jcregan]

I think it is always important to first give yourself permission and forgive yourself for not doing all the things you were doing before. Right now even though on the outside you might look like you - your body is going through what I think is even more drastic changes then the more physical/obvious ones at the end of pregnancy. Make your goals for each day small and simple - find something you might be able to eat (easier said then done I know), keep your kids relatively well fed (I had a lot of guilt at first about not feeding DD as healthy of food as I used too... but I just did the best I could). If your kids watch a bit more TV or don't go on outings or whatever right now - it is ok, do the best you are capable of.

My daily goals when I was feeling the worst never included anything like dishes or picking up or cooking or laundry. If some of that got done - great! More often it didn't.

A few people in my DDC tried acupuncture and reported good results - I had sea bands and they helped a lot but some people don't like them.

Never fear getting help as well if you think that might be beneficial!

Also try to get a couple minutes by yourself (I like baths) to maybe just concentrate on you and remember you are still YOU even when not doing the things you did before.


Good luck! Hope you feel better soon!

[Aliy]

ugh I understand i feel like death half the time.....
regularly there is a nagging feeling of i'm going to puke sitting in the back of my throat.

Going out is not applealing I just want to stay in bed

It is also possible you could be suffering from depression? I know i did with my last pregnancy and i'm finding it starting with this one. I'm going to try cod liver oil to balance this out

[Karamom]

uhh. I know how you feel. It's 5pm and I'm still not dressed. Wearing my dh's boxers because I have no clean underwear. No bra. My house is a MESS!!! I just can't bring myself to get anything done. Luckily the kids are playing by themselves, at least right now. I'm 10 weeks so I hope this will end in another 2 or so.