DD is starting to not play nice

[maptome]

I apologize if this topic has been covered ad nauseam. I'm new to the Gentle Discipline forum.

DD is 13 months. She just started not playing so nice with the other babies. She's been grabbing other kids' arms and moving them off of "her" toy and then giving them a nasty look. I always thought that I would let the kids work it out, but DD has never been the aggressor before. It feels really different. What do I do?

[NewMoonMum]

That answer is SO different for different people.
Some people do believe in "letting the kids work it out".
NOT to sound critical of other people's parenting decisions, but I personally don't like this approach. Unless I'm missing something, this seems to assume such young kids will understand the concepts of empathy and "fairness" far earlier than possible. Even at age 5, a true understanding of empathy will be rather rare. The way I figure, letting the kids act with aggression until they realize on their own that it does not feel good to be treated that way, would probably make the behavior a hard habit to break.
On the few occasions my son has taken toys and the like from somebody else(admittedly few, he seems to be pretty mellow and usually asks instead), I have just told him we do not grab things out of other people's hands, and he needs to wait his turn.
I certainly believe in things like letting kids make their own mistakes, learn natural consequences, etc. But when it comes to how to treat other people, I feel that good behavior generally needs to be taught, at least while they are young and learning the social ropes. Just my two cents.

[cocobean]

Totally agree with newmoonmum. My DS went through the same stage. It drove me crazy!!!! He's going to turn 2 next week, and just let me tell you that it does get better. For us I would talk to him before he would be in the situation about how he couldn't hit and that he had to share. While he played I would watch for signs that violence was coming and try to remind him to be nice and share. It took LOTS of patience but we're finally on the other side. I read the No Cry Discipline Solution and it really helped me with all the discipline issues of this age. Good luck! Try to stay calm!