I hate feeling so innocent

[KatieCountrycm]

I feel like I'm 18yrs. old in terms of life and sexual experiences though I'm 30. Back then, I was scared of life. venturimg out onto adventures and meeting people. In the last couple yrs. I've learned a lot about life.

I had a fling with someone that I trusted because he "knew" how innocent I was in terms of having sex and I wanted to be more confident in "doing it". I loved it and want more of it. It ended when he knew I wanted more out of the deal, a relationship.

Now, I want sex only when there's a relationship involved. Problem is, I have a hard time getting to know a guy when they know I can't hear well due to hearing loss and don't want some guy taking advatange of me.

[doubledutch]

what about getting to know someone better by text, facebook or email? not that you would necessarily meet online, but it can be a good way to chat with someone you may potentially be interested in. i also feel like i really get to see what someone is like by observing how they interact with their family and friends. i'm not saying that to imply that your own face-to-face conversations aren't important - it's a big deal. i think if you find a guy who is understanding, caring and interested enough to make sure he communicates well with you, then you've found a winner!

i also want to say, if you were so innocent, you wouldn't even be worrying about guys trying to take advantage. you've had some experience, and you learned from it, right? i hope you are able to find a worthy partner, and until you do, being relatively innocent isn't so bad. better than being completely jaded.

[CrazyCatLady]

I have worked as a stripper, porn star, escort, etc. This is really a grass is greener situation imo. Your innocence is not a bad thing and when you find the right guy that you have a good chemistry with, it's not going to matter anyways.

At thirty it's totally normal to want to find a guy that you can be in a relationship with and have great sex with lol. I think we all want that!

I second trying out internet dating. This way you can read about the guy, talk to him, and figure out if he's even worth the time/money it takes to go on a proper date. Saves a LOT of time/energy/grief. Do NOT mess around on the first (or second) date. It's very tempting, but can really lead to bad vibes and you feeling taken advantage of.

There are tons of books and internet sites that can give you "tips" so you can feel more confident. Shoot, cosmo magazine has stuff like that all the time. Doing stuff on your own and figuring out what you like also makes you much more confident and assertive when you're with a guy (sorry mods, I'm trying to keep this appropriate).

The innocence is not a bad thing. You have tons of time to explore all the stuff that you feel you missed out on when you were younger. I find that the older I get, the more I enjoy all that kind of stuff anyways.