I had given away all of our pregnancy books after my DS was born, so I turned to google for info and do understand the importance of abstaining in the first tri. I did have a couple beers early on, but after having now 6 weeks of spotting, bleeding, cramping (another red bleed this morning after brown clots on Tuesday and an A++ ultrasound on Monday showing the SCH was resolving quickly), I find myself extremely irritated at having to make all the preparations and sacrifices for a healthy pregnancy and at the same time understanding how delicate it is. That is just me, and just this pregnancy.
I am 1st-gen Greek-American on one side, and in Greece, wine goes with every dinner, pregnant or no. And so does dirty, nasty (delicious) soft cheese that's not particularly well-refrigerated or pasteurized. I was talking to my stepmom, who still lives there and had 2 kids, and I was telling her we abstain from unpasteurized feta during pregnancy as well as heating up the sandwich meat, etc. for listeria.
She agreed with the lunchmeat, but was appalled and perplexed at the idea of the soft cheeses.
I understand it's all about minimizing the risks, and I understand that the risks are higher in the first tri. And that we all probably know people who drank and smoked and ate cold ham sandwiches and feta and sushi that had healthy babies. Hell, people do crystal meth when they're pregnant! Crack! I have a friend that adopted a baby whose mother had a crystal meth addiction and indulged during pregnancy, and she's a fine, healthy school-aged child, but that DOES NOT mean it's a good idea.
I guess part of it, for me, too, is that I have now have had 5 bleeds this pregnancy. Having a glass of wine (which I didn't last night, although I REALLY wanted to) would kind of be a nice way of saying, F you, universe. For making me crazy and worried and making me miss almost the whole last summer before my oldest starts school by being too sick and then by having a ruptured membrane right over my cervix for a pregnancy I didn't even *want* but now find myself excited about to go to the beach run around with my kids at the park like I had planned to all year and then saying when I'm sad and frustrated I can't even have a glass of wine. /endrant