The September "Whatever" Thread

[MarineWife]

Ok, here it is.

hilary ~ I don't know about EPO. I don't take that. The midwife I saw told me to start taking the flaxseed oil after I was already pg because it's supposed to help support a pg. (Actually, she told me to take fish oil but that makes me sick so I take flaxseed oil instead, which is fine.) Flaxseed oil can be taken all the time.

My temps were weird again. I woke at 4:20 and took my temp, 97.3. Stayed in bed, maybe dozed off a few times, maybe not. Temped again at 6:35, 97.7. That's close to what it would be from the 4:20 if adjusted. So, how weird is that my temp is either 97.3 or 97.7 regardless of when I take it? I put the 4:20 temp in. Yesterday's temp was taken around 5:30.

I got a + opk today. What to do, what to do. If we BD tonight and I O tomorrow, it will be serious boy timing. If we don't BD, I think it may be too late for a chance of pg. Last BD would just barely be within the 6 day window but my CF was sticky that day so not likely that much sperm survived. I would not really count on a pg from that. If I don't O until the day after tomorrow and we BD tonight, it could go either way, I think, but still more boy timing. *sigh*

You guys can tell me if I'm getting to TTC for this thread. I won't be hurt or offended.

Oh,

[akind1]

MW: I know it is more boy timing, but does it really guarantee a boy? is there still some chance for a girl? and how dead set are you on pink? Just some thoughts. and I for one would like you to stay, if for no other reason than you are just so knowledgeable!


did we have any graduates in August? I don't think so.

[Baby_Cakes]

Hilary - yes, you only take EPO from af through O. It can cause uterine contrax which is why you should stop taking it, just in case you are pg. Then after 37 weeks, you can take it again to encourage labor, if you want. I think last pg, I took it from 37 or 38 weeks and DD came at 39w3d.

MW - I don't think you sound "too TTC", but should you be giving your body more time? I know you don't have it in your heart to prevent, and obviously you have to do what your heart tells you, but just be cautious. Be careful. Did the dr you saw tell you to wait a cycle or anything before not preventing anymore? You can tell me to zip it if I'm out of line at all. Otherwise, I say a +opk can mean a few things. You might not O for 2 days in which case a BD tonight would have a better chance for girl. DD was conceived O-2.

AFM - I didn't temp this am b/c I woke up and realized DD had wet the bed. Ugh. It was 6:30 am!! So, I had to wake her up, change her, change the sheets, etc. More important things to do, I guess! I'm not concerned b/c I'm still pre-O, so we'll just keep dtd like always and see what happens. It was almost liberating not to temp. I think I may confirm O this cycle and then stop temping. It was very freeing.

Still, here's my chart in case anyone is interested in looking. Kinda boring as of yet.

[BarefootScientist]

Subbing.

MW I think you're fine. I mean as far as being too TTC. I think we all understand why you don't want to be on the TTC boards, and since your DH is ambivalent or not totally not board...are you really TTC? I mean, I know we've talked about this a lot but I don't think there is really a definition of TTC. There's a continuum from very strict CTA-absolutely-do-not-want-a-baby to you know, IVF or what not. And this thread is for those of us somewhere in the middle who feel like we belong more "whatever". At least IMO.

There's a funky red line right on the edge of your chart, what is that? Never seen that before. It does definitely look like you're Oing fairly soon. Good luck!

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by akind1

MW: I know it is more boy timing, but does it really guarantee a boy? is there still some chance for a girl? and how dead set are you on pink? Just some thoughts. and I for one would like you to stay, if for no other reason than you are just so knowledgeable!


did we have any graduates in August? I don't think so.

I don't think we did have any graduates for August.

Of course, there's no guarantee but I think with my history another boy would be very, very likely. I would absolutely love, love, love a girl. This would be my absolute last chance for a girl. I'm pretty sure that I would not want to have a 5th baby when I am 43+ and I know my dh won't. That being said, I realized a few days ago that I'd be just as happy with a boy at this point as long as I get a live baby.

I won't go anywhere. I'm not wanting to go to the TTC board. I'll just shut up about all my girl TTC stuff if it's too much for anyone.

[AnnieA]

MW, I think you should just go for it. We've both been on these boards long enough to have seen mamas have boys from DTD 6 days prior to O and mamas that have girls from DTD the day before O.

AFM: I wonder if I should join you guys over here. DH and I have not had a discussion regarding this but we have resumed intercourse and we do not use any protection or w/d. Are we playing with fire? I'm not worried about a baby but I am worried about getting pregnant so soon after a D&E.

My chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1f0436

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by BarefootScientist

There's a funky red line right on the edge of your chart, what is that? Never seen that before. It does definitely look like you're Oing fairly soon. Good luck!

Hey, yeah what is that line??

[BarefootScientist]

Wow this thread is quite busy right now.

Originally Posted by MarineWife

I won't go anywhere. I'm not wanting to go to the TTC board. I'll just shut up about all my girl TTC stuff if it's too much for anyone.

You don't have to shut up. I'm enjoying hearing about it all, though I don't have many comments.

Originally Posted by AnnieA

AFM: I wonder if I should join you guys over here. DH and I have not had a discussion regarding this but we have resumed intercourse and we do not use any protection or w/d. Are we playing with fire? I'm not worried about a baby but I am worried about getting pregnant so soon after a D&E.

Annie you are certainly welcome to join us! I know absolutely nothing about D&E so I can't say anything about whether it's too soon but I would advise at least talking to your DH about it so you're on the same page.

[MarineWife]

We're cross-posting.

Originally Posted by BarefootScientist

There's a funky red line right on the edge of your chart, what is that? Never seen that before. It does definitely look like you're Oing fairly soon. Good luck!

Oops. I was messing with my chart and wanted to see what the PG monitor would say if I do O tomorrow so I set the O detector to opk. The red line meant O would be tomorrow. I changed it back.

The PG monitor said chances of pg would be low with just the bd we have because there's none in the fertile window. That's kind of weird because then I read info about the fertile window on FF that says it is the 5 days before and the day of O. Wouldn't that mean any bd within 6 days of O could result in a pg?

The Fertile Window

Annie ~ It is possible for you to get pg this cycle. It all depends on when/if you O. You may get another bleed before you O. You may not. There's no way to know ahead of time. The intake nurse at the OB's office I went to the other day said it's recommended to wait 3 full cycles after a m/c to get pg again to allow the lining to build back up. However, the OB was excited that I looked very fertile when he did my exam and told me to go home and bd that night. The MFM doc didn't seem concerned about me getting pg again right away. He didn't advise against it. My miscarriage was much earlier than yours, though, and I did not have a D&C. I don't how those 2 factors might influence their attitudes.

Also, I think I've told you this, but from what I've read online there's no scientifically based medical reason to wait. That seems to be more of a convenience thing for the docs so they can date your pg more easily. The other reason I've read docs suggest women wait to get pg again is for their emotional well-being.

I think if you feel emotionally ready for another pg and your body is ready, don't worry about it. I don't think the body would O and allow for a pg if it weren't ready. KWIM? If you really don't want to get pg again right away, use precautions.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by BarefootScientist

I'm enjoying hearing about it all, though I don't have many comments.

Yes, I can hear you faintly chuckling at me.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

I think if you feel emotionally ready for another pg and your body is ready, don't worry about it. I don't think the body would O and allow for a pg if it weren't ready. KWIM? If you really don't want to get pg again right away, use precautions.

That's been my thinking as well. I think our bodies are much better at protecting themselves than we give them credit for. Survival of the species and all. With regard to the emotional side of things, I'll have to think about that some more. Someone over on the loss forums said you should use the gauge of if you would be emotionally ok with another loss. I'm not sure where I am with that.

Oh and BFS, I agree that DH and I need to have a convo about this.

[BarefootScientist]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

Yes, I can hear you faintly chuckling at me.

[Maine Mama Doula]

MW - i take hemp oild instead of flax oil and it's supposed to be a lot better. I think it has something to do with the ratio of omega fatty acids? And it's vegan I am getting now what BD means, but what is the literal translation?

Annie - I think that if you're not ready to conceive again, then I would at least talk to DH about WD. My loss was conceived with a WD, late in my cycle.

This thread is moving fast...I don't know how you all keep up

[BarefootScientist]

Originally Posted by Maine Mama Doula

MW - i take hemp oild instead of flax oil and it's supposed to be a lot better. I think it has something to do with the ratio of omega fatty acids? And it's vegan I am getting now what BD means, but what is the literal translation?

Baby Dance I believe.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by Maine Mama Doula

Annie - I think that if you're not ready to conceive again, then I would at least talk to DH about WD. My loss was conceived with a WD, late in my cycle.

Our religion does not condone w/d. So if we need to avoid, we abstain. I think I'm going to have to talk to him about this tonight.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by AnnieA

Someone over on the loss forums said you should use the gauge of if you would be emotionally ok with another loss.

If I went by that, I would never be ready to try again. I really don't know how anyone could be ok in any way with another loss. But I also feel like I don't really have much choice. For me, it's either hope/try for another pg and risk another loss or completely give up on ever having another baby. When I was going through this last m/c, I thought I was ready to give up. I just didn't want to deal with any of it anymore. I'm in a different place now. I'm not ready to give up the hope of having another baby someday so I keep on keeping on.

[BHappy]

subbing!

[onetwoten]

Everything all you ladies have said *nods* I'm running a little behind today, but MW- I would say go for it if you want to-- but if you don't feel like dtd tonight, then take that as fate or what have you that it's better to wait until next month. But I don't see a problem with trying to fit one more in, and it's not guaranteed that it would result in a boy...

I think conceiving after a loss is probably more of an emotional thing as well. Obviously how your body reacted to it makes a difference, but I do agree it makes sense evolutionary that our bodies would be ready again. I would think I guess, that if your body wasn't ready for another pregnancy, then you likely simply wouldn't get pregnant. If the concern is the lining, then there wouldn't be a place for it to implant firmly, ykwim?

AFM: I'm about CD10 I think, no real signs of impending ovulation, I haven't been temping, keep saying I'll start, but haven't yet. My CF is not dry... but it doesn't seem fertile either, mostly creamy if I had to classify. I have two days off now, so I think we'll get some BD in anyways

[MovingMomma]

MW: Aren't the better odds just like 60/40 when going for gender?

I haven't seen any convincing studies either way about whether waiting to conceive post-mc is better than not. I think it's clear there's no need to wait past 3 cycles, emotional considerations aside. But the latest big study that said it was actually better to go for it right away than to wait was looking at older women (over 40) & maybe they all had fertility issues to begin with...anyway, I wasn't convinced that the data said what the authors said it did; there were too many confounding variables.

[Baby_Cakes]

MW- I was thinking...on whether or not u should bd after the pos opk. I think search deep and think what do you want more - a girl or a baby either way? I think if your answer is girl - wait. If your answer is baby either way - go for it.