feeling torn

[arianascrunchymama]

I had a pretty traumatic public school experience and have seriously considered home/unschooling DD since I was pregnant with her. I don't want to project my negative experiences onto her, but it just seems so natural.

The hard part is that I'm newly single and going through a divorce. DD and I had no choice but to move 2 hours away to my hometown and are now living with my family. I feel like on my own I can't be a SAHM so I'm working as a breastfeeding peer counselor for the local WIC which is not only a job but is working my towards my goal of being an IBCLC. DD is in an in home day care 3 days a week now after 2 years of being home with me. It was hard at first but she and I both love where she's at. It's an in home day care with a husband and wife who are the most soft spoken, good, moral, nurturing people I know.

I find that I LIKE having a reason to get dressed and put on makeup every day. I like having me time. exH turned out to be a chovanistic pig after DD was born and I was literally a prisoner in our home. I loved being able to focus 100% on being a mom but I think I have a lot of resentment lingering from how exH defined me as a SAHM. Am I maybe not cut out to be an home/unschooling mom?

[newcastlemama]

s My only advice is that the school decision is 3-4 years away still and who knows what you or your life will be like by then. Everything has changed a lot for you and your dd recently so I would just enjoy your new job and time with your dd.

[Piglet68]

I agree that you do have time, and you don't know what place you will be at when the time comes to commit to a decision one way or the other.

I will say that unschooling is very flexible. Kids are learning all the time, which leaves plenty of time in your week to be away doing "grown up things". If you can find good, play-based care (including preschool and perhaps even kindergarten) you can still stick with your unschooling principles. When the child is school-aged you will need to find care for her that doesn't try to shove academics at her, and that respects what you are doing. But it's entirely doable to be a working parent and unschool if you work part time and/or have flexible hours and good childcare.

Also, look into what programs are offered in your area for homeschoolers. Here we have programs that use "learning centres", kind of like a school for unschoolers, where the kids can go for a day or two a week and hang out. Something like that would work well in your situation.