DH has gone ahead of us to relocate, and will be where he is for a few months without us. Where we are heading if the area his family lives. Until he finds a place for us, he is staying with a family member there.
Right now, Skype is our friend so we can keep in touch- he can see the kids and they can see him.
At any rate, he had already related to me the comments he'd gotten from people shocked when he answered honestly, 'Is the baby sleeping through the night?' and the well- intended advice to make sure that we just put him down and leave him as 'he'll learn in a few days that crying won't get him out of bed.' DH is honest to a fault- white lies and omissions are just not natural to him- he's the type of guy who, when asked how your pants look. would be brutally honest about the fact that they make your thighs look chunky. *sigh* I love it about him, but it makes it impossible for him to get saying 'they sleep great!'
I had just finished sitting on the couch with the youngest swaddled- rocking and patting him to sleep when the computer 'rang' with a call from DH. Keeping DS 2 snuggled against me sound asleep- I answered it. BIL was there with DH and instantly commented asking why the baby was still up, that I was spoiling him and the whole overused thing. I gently said that he had just fallen asleep and was comfy- and I would take him to bed with me soon.
"You're spoiling him!" "We know who is in charge in your house!" "Your job is to make him obey" "Both a and b's kids are about the same age and they have been sttn for months now, you just need to show him who is boss."
Oh- the horror! I'm getting parenting advice (and criticism) from well over 1000 miles away.
Honestly, I'm on my own with three kids for an extended period, I don't need criticism- I was celebrating a good day without any major issues cropping up. My mood was not helped when DH was informed that the family would teach him how to get the kids on a schedule so he could teach me how to properly take care of them.
DH is NOT good at standing up to his family. I am not worried about this as an issue when I am there because I am better at setting boundaries. Also, these are the people who are always in awe of how 'good' our kids are- so why is our parenting suddenly defined by how much sleep we get and whether we teach our kids to go sleep in a crib?
(apologies for writing style- or lack thereof, it's early, and both the youngest and I woke up feeling crummy.
)
Right now, Skype is our friend so we can keep in touch- he can see the kids and they can see him.
At any rate, he had already related to me the comments he'd gotten from people shocked when he answered honestly, 'Is the baby sleeping through the night?' and the well- intended advice to make sure that we just put him down and leave him as 'he'll learn in a few days that crying won't get him out of bed.' DH is honest to a fault- white lies and omissions are just not natural to him- he's the type of guy who, when asked how your pants look. would be brutally honest about the fact that they make your thighs look chunky. *sigh* I love it about him, but it makes it impossible for him to get saying 'they sleep great!'
I had just finished sitting on the couch with the youngest swaddled- rocking and patting him to sleep when the computer 'rang' with a call from DH. Keeping DS 2 snuggled against me sound asleep- I answered it. BIL was there with DH and instantly commented asking why the baby was still up, that I was spoiling him and the whole overused thing. I gently said that he had just fallen asleep and was comfy- and I would take him to bed with me soon.
"You're spoiling him!" "We know who is in charge in your house!" "Your job is to make him obey" "Both a and b's kids are about the same age and they have been sttn for months now, you just need to show him who is boss."
Oh- the horror! I'm getting parenting advice (and criticism) from well over 1000 miles away.
Honestly, I'm on my own with three kids for an extended period, I don't need criticism- I was celebrating a good day without any major issues cropping up. My mood was not helped when DH was informed that the family would teach him how to get the kids on a schedule so he could teach me how to properly take care of them.
DH is NOT good at standing up to his family. I am not worried about this as an issue when I am there because I am better at setting boundaries. Also, these are the people who are always in awe of how 'good' our kids are- so why is our parenting suddenly defined by how much sleep we get and whether we teach our kids to go sleep in a crib?
(apologies for writing style- or lack thereof, it's early, and both the youngest and I woke up feeling crummy.
)
He's got a very strange relationship with his family. I am not looking forward to having to be the person in our marriage to enforce boundaries with his family.
"You are babying him, he'll never learn to be a man like that!"
