Would you change your 12 month old's name? - Page 2

[Lisa1970]

Originally Posted by lilyka

You mentioned you had lost a child. Could the whole naming thing be related to that. I think before you do anything you and your dh need counseling and need to be able to come to a decision on this together. There has got to be more to this story than what is being communicated here. I mean I get you don't like the name but what about your dh. He obviously likes ryan more than other names. Is he attached to that name? Does he maybe feel you are not listening to him? How does he feel about changing it? the poor kid, despite what the birth certificate says really does not have a name. Lots of different people calling him lots of different things. I don't think waiting longer at this point will hurt. might as well resolve the underlying issues first before further tangling the issue.

I never thought about that. We did not have these issues of him hating all baby names until Andy died. I admit that even I had 2 names in mind...one for if the baby lives and one for if the baby dies. I know, it sounds awful, but if you had a baby die, you might understand the thinking. Maybe this is behind his name issue.

[Belia]

I apologize if I sound harsh, especially since there's a lot going on here.

But I would sit down with DH and decide upon a single name for your son. Now. The name I would pick would be both his "official" name as well as the name I would call him. Then I would change the legal documentation so it is accurate. Then I would inform all of your family, friends, coworkers, etc, both near and far, of your son's name. And I would insist that it be used by everybody all the time until it is an automatic. And I would not monkey around with this child's name again.


Liam Andrew
Rowan Andrew
Ryan Andrew


All three are gorgeous! And your son deserves to know which one of these belongs to him.

Stop this madness.

P.S. If, for some reason, you and your DH are not able to have this discussion and make this decision, then I would get to a counselor YESTERDAY to try and figure out what's really going on here.

[lilyka]

Originally Posted by Lisa1970

I never thought about that. We did not have these issues of him hating all baby names until Andy died. I admit that even I had 2 names in mind...one for if the baby lives and one for if the baby dies. I know, it sounds awful, but if you had a baby die, you might understand the thinking. Maybe this is behind his name issue.

I think he is just scared to name his baby. I think it is totally related. I think you both need counseling right away. It sounds like you both have a lot to deal with. Honestly I think the name can wait. Its not like your son really has much of a clue about what his real name is anyway. Deal with some issues first then you and your husband should pick a name together that can bless your son for the rest of what will be a very long and happy life.

I hope you all find healing and peace and love.