Should I leave my nursing 13.5 mo for a Hawaiian vacation? - Page 3

[ladylove]

Originally Posted by Tjej

Is there any way your little one could have a visit or two with the ILs before you'd go?

No, they are a 14 hr drive away.

Originally Posted by Tjej

My DS didn't do bottles but I pumped and dumped. My supply did take a hit, but I wasn't religious about pumping.

This is what I'm worried about. He nurses on-demand throughout the day, sometimes going several hours but other times more frequently.

We still haven't decided, but I think the only valid options for us right now or to take DS2 with us and not do as many strenuous activities or for me to not go at all. If I didn't go, then DH might stay an extra 2 days.

If only this opportunity had come along in 6-9 months, then the decision would be so much easier.

[Ninetales]

I have to say, I'm thinking a lot about your older child here. Maybe he's not sensitive to things like this, but at that age I would have been extremely resentful that my baby sibling got to go on an exotic vacation like that. Whether or not he would actually remember enjoy it or remember any of it wouldn't have been relevant. Even if I had no concept of what or where Hawaii was, I would later, you know? And seeing pictures of everyone else having fun without me would make me really jealous.

But, you know your child better than anyone else, so maybe that wouldn't be an issue. I just wanted to bring that up in case you hadn't considered it.

[ladylove]

As for DS1, he would be so excited to spend time with his grandparents and I'm sure he would be upset when he got older and realized we went to Hawaii without him. He went on a really cool trip when he was a baby and obviously DS2 did not, so I think both boys will just have to live with the seemingly unfairness of it all.

In any regard, we decided that I won't be going. I just can't leave the baby and I don't want to take the risk that our nursing relationship would be compromised.

Thanks everyone for your input. We read every post carefully and really appreciated everyone's thoughts.

[Dingletwitz]

Some ideas here:
If DS1 grows up understanding nursing, he will also understand why the younger had to go with on the trip!
If there are going to be disagreements among the siblings and/or resentments it could conceivably go the other way "you got to be with gp's for a whole week and I never had that". But there are going to be those types of things anyway.

OP, do you want to go? That's the question. You seemed excited! Why not go? Many of the active things there are to do can be done with a l.o., and if they're too heinous, it's probably good to only have one parent doing them at a time anyway!

Does DH want your company on the trip? Maybe it's not the ideal romantic getaway at this point but in another couple of years when you might be all.done.with.nursing and try to get away for a week only to come back to a happy latcher-oner, it might be great! (not that I've btdt or anything)

Me? I'd do it, especially if the future travel opportunities seem bleak. Four years of nursiemommy gives you the skill to take a nursling anywhere, doesn't it? If you wonder ahead and think "huh, I'm going to be so bummed" then I think your decision is made!

[Linda on the move]

Originally Posted by ladylove

In any regard, we decided that I won't be going. I just can't leave the baby and I don't want to take the risk that our nursing relationship would be compromised.

I think you're making the right choice.

I hope you guys plan a wonderful vacation as a family that you can all enjoy, and that you and your DH start finding ways to spend more time together as a couple.

Sometimes we feel like a window of opportunity is the only one that will ever come along, but I don't think that's true. More windows come along later.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Originally Posted by EllyMayMomma

If you decide to leave DS, you need to make peace with the possibility of weaning. My sister went on a trip without her 12 mo old baby for a week, intending to nurse when she got home (we are HUGE on nursing and since their BF relationship was so great she thought they could just pick it back up.) Did not work and she was devastated.

If it were me, no question I would take him. We traveled across country with all 3 kids when our youngest was 14 mo. He did just fine with the travel. You can talk to your doc about medication for air sickness if needed (would probably make him sleepy on the plane.) Nursing baby on the plane makes things go smoothly.

But he also may not wean - my ds went for a week with his dad at 19mo and picked nursing right back up after he came home. I was SO worried, and it was no big deal.

[mouso]

I wouldn't, but my DS flips out when I leave the room to put something in the hamper. My Dd was the same. I would miss them too much too at that age and would be worried the whole time. I simply couldn't do it, even though I would like to!

I would consider it if I had a different kid who took bottles and slept (well, or at all, really- haha) decently without me. But I don't, and never have, so I can't imagine it.

I hope you're OK with your decision and don't feel like you're missing out on too much. Can you and DH get away for a night or two?