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what to do when your kid whants you to have a boyfreind

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 
My five yr old son told me he is mad at me because I don't have a boyfriend part of me just wants to go get one but I do not want to lower my standards. Need some support advice thanks
post #2 of 6
i would ask why he wants you to have a boyfriend. my soon to be 5 year old told me the other night that he wants me to get married. i asked a few questions and found out that what he really wants is for me to have more babies. there's usually more to these requests than what they're actually saying.
post #3 of 6
since dd was 2 she has been wanting me to get a new daddy so she could have siblings and be a big sister. i would tell her - hey i am not objecting but i havent found anyone interesting. by about 6 when she became the big kid in the park and had the little ones mob her she decided she was happy being an only.

just coz he wants one doesnt mean you have to go get one. as pp says find out WHY he wants you to have one.
post #4 of 6
My DD is on the opposite spectrum. She informed me that no one is allowed to kiss me besides her and my DS. Oh and daddy . She likes to add that in there because we "kissed before".

She does however want a baby sister and another baby brother.
post #5 of 6
i would explain age-appropriately why that's not happening right now (like, i want to choose really carefully, because i love you so much and want to only let a very good person be a part of our lives; it will take time to find someone like that). if it's because he's worried about you coping on your own, you could talk about your support network. if he's wanting a dude to hang out with for himself, you can talk about the men in his life and try to schedule some time for him with them (grandpa, uncle, a friend, whatever).

this is a good question. my first thought was, "what the heck - he's five, he doesn't really get a say in your dating life," but honestly, i'm a pleaser, and i would be probably posting the same thing if my 5yo expressed this to me. as it is, i think he has no idea about the possibility of me dating some day, and i kind of like it that way for now. this has helped me think about it though, how i will talk to him (and 3yo) about it.
post #6 of 6
I have heard this a lot before. Like others said, it may be because he wants siblings, a man who likes to spend time with him, to see you happy, or it could be a desire to have a family like some of his friends may have.

I would find out more about his reasons. Maybe there are things he is wanting that you could provide in other ways, like more frequent contact with other kids, or playtime with uncles or family friends. Or maybe you could do a mommy and son date night out on the town.
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