Two kids and one parent at bedtime - Page 2

[lilyka]

Some options:

Instead of a video let ds#1 listen to a book on tape while you put ds#2 down. Then reward him by reading to him before bed. Its a bonus book!

Do jammies and tooth brushing at the same time.

Let ds #1 take a bath while you put #2 down. Finish up bath, teeth and jammies then start bedtime routine. You can also read his story while he is in the tub if this doesn't tile him up. He might like that or it may be too much trouble.

Once you have something that works without your dh stick with it even if he isn't there.

Get them both ready and nurse baby while you are sitting next to your four year old. This will only work if you do not have to fight him to lay down but can just be there next to him. once he is asleep move baby to his bed and carry on with your night.

[petitchou]

Thanks for all the ideas. You are all giving me courage! I'm beginning to think that I might be able to do this!

Ds1 will not just stay quietly in his room. If I don't help him calm down, he gets more and more excited and keyed up and it ends up taking foreeeever to calm him back down again. If I don't stay right there in the room and sit in front of the door (as he's screaming his bloodcurdling scream in my ear), he will not stay in the room. Yes, we have issues. I've actually seen a big improvement in his ability to calm himself down recently but we still have a long way to go.

Bedtime is early because they both need about 12 hours of sleep at night and they both get up between 6:30/7am. I would LOVE to sleep in a little later but they both are like little alarm clocks in the morning. (At least they're on the same schedule!) By 6pm, ds1 is already bouncing off the walls. The later I wait, the more hyper he gets and it ends up taking hours and lots of screaming to get him to sleep.

I like the idea of a book on tape. He loves his French books on tape but I never tried them at bedtime. Maybe get a new special one just for bedtime. I wonder if he'd stay in his room for that.

[lilyka]

also check the library. Ours has tons of books on tape.

Don't feel bad about the early bed time. That sounds perfect. I highly recommend the book The Seven O'clock Bedtime. It sings the virtues (and scientific studies) behind kids getting enough sleep and how to make it happen. Actually besides helping you feel very confident in your bedtime it might give you some ideas to make bedtime run more smoothly. She starts bedtime routines the minute she picks the kids up for school. Everything from when we eat, to our activities and such effect our kids ability to sleep. She is fairly structured but also is realistic about if you want them to be restful by this time you have to get a bunch of exercise by this time and finish eating by this time and winding down for sleep by this time. She is not at all about sleep training or anything. So don't worry.

[2cutiekitties]

Originally Posted by lilyka

also check the library. Ours has tons of books on tape.

Don't feel bad about the early bed time. That sounds perfect. I highly recommend the book The Seven O'clock Bedtime. It sings the virtues (and scientific studies) behind kids getting enough sleep and how to make it happen. Actually besides helping you feel very confident in your bedtime it might give you some ideas to make bedtime run more smoothly. She starts bedtime routines the minute she picks the kids up for school. Everything from when we eat, to our activities and such effect our kids ability to sleep. She is fairly structured but also is realistic about if you want them to be restful by this time you have to get a bunch of exercise by this time and finish eating by this time and winding down for sleep by this time. She is not at all about sleep training or anything. So don't worry.

hmmmm, I am going to get this book, thanks!! Since DS 3.5 started preschool and needs to get up at 8am and needs 12-13 hours of sleep, I have noticed that since the moment I pick him up from preschool at 1:30, my whole focus is how to get him asleep by 8 pm, and we are not doing so well on that front. Lucky if he is asleep by 9-9:30 sigh.

[lilyka]

If I recall correctly she is big into routine (things like birthday parties and after school activities are strictly limited because they 1) interfere with routine and 2) because of the early bedtime family time is often limited so on weekends and stuff she chooses to make it family time). Her basic after school routine was feed them a light snack the minute they get in the car. As soon as they get home time for running and playing. then homework while she preps dinner. dinner is served by 5 or 5:30. then bed time routines start and then kids are in bed by 7:00PM

Its a good book. It helped me see sleep as a very important part of my kids health. it also helped me see that some kids just need help with sleep. but like I said, she doesn't even touch on sleep training. He focus is on school age kids (and kids who for other reasons much get up early in the morning.) She also makes it clear that there is nothing magic about 7:00PM but that is just what time her kids have to get to bed in order to get enough sleep to get up for school. We did not have to get up that early so we did not go to bed that early.

[petitchou]

I'm going to have to check out that book too. I feel like I am constantly monitoring what we do and how it will affect ds1's sleep. It's exhausting. We've had sleep problems with ds1 since he was born and I know my friends and family think I'm way too uptight about his sleep (and since ds2 has come into the picture, I can see why as he's soooo much easier to deal with). But we simply can't do a lot of evening activities because he is miserable and grumpy for days afterward.

So yeah, this book sounds right up my alley!

[lilyka]

When my youngest was a baby she was on a strict sleep schedule (because it made our life blissful when she got enough sleep) and we got a lot of flack about missing activities and parties and stuff but we just did not do ANYTHING between the hours of noon and three. Didn't pick up the phone, answer the door, go to homeschool meetings. I don't care if Ghandi was knocking on my door I would tell him it would have to wait. And now I am that way with evening activities. And my kids are not small. They are between the ages of 7 and 14. the only thing we stay up late for is church. Right now after school activities are banned. we are looking into after school tae kwon do but it has to be over before seven and we have to be able to all take the same class at the same time as a family. No apologies. Our priorities are family time and bed time.