Sleeping with newborn on chest

[Laurski]

I'm hoping some veteran cosleepers can help me...

I have a two week old who refuses to sleep without being held. She'll sleep like an angel in our arms, then freak out the second her back hits the cosleeper. We swaddle her tightly with a miracle blanket; she calms down for a little while in the swaddle as long as we're holding her, but the second we put her in the cosleeper, she struggles against the swaddle (grunting, putting her legs up at a 45 degree angle, etc.) until she starts crying again (and works her hands free of the swaddle--and trust me, DH is swaddling her *tightly*).

So, we've decided to try bedsharing with her, and from what I've read, some folks who have had babies similar to mine have slept with the baby on their chest (I've tried putting her on her back in bed next to me--she'll have none of it). I'm wondering if those who have done the chest-sleeping thing have any tips/advice for how to do so safely and comfortably. (DH and I have been alternating sleeping in a chair with her, but it's starting to kill our backs!)

[ASusan]

We just slept in the bed with him on our chests. I don't think I used a pillow to prop myself up or anything. I did have to sit straight up (w/ a brestfriend pillow) to nurse. I used a "husband" pillow behind me when I did that. But for sleeping, he was face down on our chests. (DH and i took turns holding him.)

Sometimes, he laid across my belly, with his feet on the bed and his head on my belly. He liked to be somewhat upright. (probably because he had a problem with dairy that I hadn't figured out yet.)

[FrugalGranolaMom]

We went through the same thing with DS. He hated to be swaddled and would wake up instantly when we laid him down on his back. However, he would sleep like a rock laying on our chests so that's what we would end up doing. DH and I would take turns. He is a total stomach sleeper now. For myself it took a bit of an adjustment since I am also a stomach sleeper. I had to prop myself up and have a pillow under my knees so my back wouldn't hurt.

[Tway]

I'm not saying it's ideal or the safest solution, but this is what we did for DD's first 5 or so weeks:

I'd lie on the couch propped up by 2 pillows. Since it was late fall, I wore a zip-up fleece jacket with the zipper open. DH would lie DD on my chest, and I'd prop a pillow under one arm. DH would then push the coffee table up against the other side of the couch and prop a pillow under my other arm. He'd then put a pillow under my knees. I was pretty immobile, and made sure DD was only touching my skin and couldn't slide off.

I didn't get the best sleep, but it was at least some sleep.

[Sonneva]

I slept in bed on my back with the baby laying tummy to my tummy with both of my babies for at least the first three months. My 9 month old still sleeps either on my tummy or the crook of my arm... it never felt unsafe.

[kriket]

My DS was the same way, he had to be on your belly, or cradled in your arms. I wish I had advice, it was a rough time for us. He did eventually start sleeping without being thisclose, but it was a lot of sleepless nights until then.

The kicker was he would sleep like a rock if you laid him on his belly, but DH was terrified of SIDS.

[Lilygoose]

My DD would only sleep on my chest. It terrified me b/c I did not know anything about cosleeping at the time, but she would not sleep at all anywhere else. I would not recommend a chair b/c I would be scared if she fell of my chest it would be a long way to the ground. I slept with her mostly in our bed and propped two pillows under my head so I was propped up just a bit (not for safety, this was just more comfortable for me-my DD was almost 11 pounds at birth and just continued to grow, and grow, so it was a lot of weight and I have some back problems). I tried to position myself in the bed so I had some decent room on either side if she slid off of me in the night (b/c I was ignorant of co-sleeping I did not know to put the mattress on the floor and we have a high bed frame). As a newborn she did not move around too much so I felt that she would not scoot off the side of the bed. For the record in the entire 8 (we did use a co-sleeper for a couple months) months she slept on my chest she never fell of of me. She did once fall off of my husband and he slept through it, which is why I was the one whose chest she slept on, unless I absolutely needed a break, in which case I stayed awake to supervise. She might have transitioned sleeping next to me sooner, but I have a squishy pillow top mattress and I was concerned she would smother. At 8 months she was agile enough that this was no longer an issue, and since I had discovered MDC and learned about co-sleeping we put the mattress on the floor and she slept next to me on the bed, which worked really well for a while. She is now on the process (at 2) of transitioning to her toddler bed in our room. She spends about half the night there. We also always slept skin to skin. I control the heat for our entire apartment building and it is usually really warm in our apartment in order to heat the rest of building at all. I really loved sleeping chest with her on my chest, except that it made me nervous because I didn't know how safe it was.

[Marissamom]

when DD was a newborn she only slept on my chest occasionally, it just wasn't comfortable for us. I would either sleep on my back with her on her back next to me and my arm as a sleep positioner, or on my side with my knees up below her and my arm bent right above her head. when we started being able to nurse side-laying, we would fall asleep with both of us on our sides, tummy to tummy.

[Mom2M]

My DD1 slept on my chest for 8 months and then continued to sleep half on half off for a long time.
I actually slept on a very big pillow plus a couple regular pillows on top, it was much more comfortable for me.
She was never squirmy so I didn't worry. If your LO is squirmy, I would put a rail next to the edge of the bed or put the bed against the wall.

[mntnmom]

My oldest DD slept fitfully on her back, and it was miserable for all 3 of us. I laid on my back in bed, with her head basically between my breasts. I was careful to keep the blankets low, and kept her warm in a fleece sleeper. Good Luck, it does get better!

[Mama2mc]

DS did enjoy sleeping on my chest, but I could never fall asleep because I was so scared I'd drop him or something. I nurse him laying sideway on the bed and he'll fall asleep, and after he unlatches I can get in a more comfortable position. DH did take naps with him sleeping on his chest - they both loved it and DS always slept so well.

[kittywitty]

All of my babies have always slept like that the first month or so. Just do it until it feels right. I never used contraptions or methods except an occasional pillow under an elbow if we were leaning. I thought it was by far safest because I'm a light sleeper and felt their every breath. We never had any problems.

[nabisco]

Enjoy it while it lasts! My DS used to sleep on my chest but barely likes to cuddle anymore. Nursing is really our only cuddle time nowadays (he's 9 months). It was hard, and my back used to hurt too, but now I miss it!

[rhiOrion]

DD still sleeps on me at five months.

As a newborn she slept on my chest like you are describing. I put the boppy on my stomach and a pillow under each arm. Basically I created a little crib out of my arms.

Now she sleeps with her head and shoulders on me and her butt and legs on the bed. She nurses and then rolls to her back like that, usually with her arms thrown dramatically over her head.

I still keep the boppy on my stomach, but the rest of the pillows have been done away with. I just turn the boppy a bit to put one end under my arm if I need to prop it up. I like having the boppy there for arm support as well as a barrier to keep blankets away from her.

I curl my other arm around her legs, sometimes she kicks one leg over my arm. This keeps her from being able to slide down off of me.

She can throw her body weight enough to turn over or to sit up. She nurses in her sleep by throwing herself at my nipple.

I sleep with a husband pillow behind me, as well as two squishy thin pillows. This makes it so I can lie relatively flat, or prop myself up.

I imagine she'll be sleeping on me for a while, but once I surrendered to it things got much easier. We both sleep well most nights.

[fruitfulmomma]

I sleep with my newborns on my chest. I just lay on my back in the bed, slightly propped by pillows and have them chest-to-chest with me and cover up to their armpits.

I don't swaddle.

[Laurski]

Thank you all so much for your replies! DH and I are both nervous about trying this, so it's been really reassuring to read about your experiences and advice!

We are going to try this tonight...cross your fingers for us that we all get at least a little bit of sleep!

[Laurski]

Just an update...

Success! Ellie slept on my chest last night, and we actually all got some sleep!

Thanks again for all of your suggestions and support!

[Lilygoose]

Originally Posted by Laurski

Just an update...

Success! Ellie slept on my chest last night, and we actually all got some sleep!

Thanks again for all of your suggestions and support!

I remember that feeling! A bit of sleep at last! GLad it helped.

[luckymamaoftwo]

Yes, I can totally relate! With both my kids. They would (and my 7 month old still does) wake every time I laid them next to me, no matter how cuddly we were, they'd still wake if I moved them off my chest. I never worried too much about the safety of letting them sleep on me all night. I guess I just felt okay about my motherly intuitions and felt confident that I would wake if they started to roll off my chest. It was the only way I was ever able to get any sleep. And I shouldn't be talking in past tense here, because as stated above, my DS still does sleep on me or in my arms for most of the night. It does do a number on one's back though.

[Mom2M]

Originally Posted by Laurski

Just an update...

Success! Ellie slept on my chest last night, and we actually all got some sleep!

Thanks again for all of your suggestions and support!

That's great! If your back does start hurting, try propping yourself up to a position where it doesn't.
Sweet dreams!