Spirited babies group-September - Page 3

[sosurreal09]

Aniela has regressed sleep wise this week its been horrendous...nursing every hour or so then up from 12am-2:30am happy and slapping me.....

[braidmama]

Originally Posted by sosurreal09

Aniela has regressed sleep wise this week its been horrendous...nursing every hour or so then up from 12am-2:30am happy and slapping me.....

AHH! Max has been doing the same thing for almost 2 weeks now. His naps are hard to come by as well. He's up constantly to nurse. He's definitely teething and I'm thinking perhaps a growth spurt? Has anyone here tried an amber bead necklace for teething? I hear great things about it but as pagan as I am I still feel like its a bit hoeky sounding...I still hear it works wonders...anyone? Its really affecting my moods with the sleep thing but I'm doing my best to keep calm about it all which means letting the house go to hell...really, its a disaster area but I'm putting blinders on to all of it for now. He also hasn't started crawling or rolling over or anything but akways wants to be in a standing position. If he's sitting on my lap or lying on my chest (while I'm sitting), he will strain his legs to straighten them and sort of push off into a standing position, while I'm steadying his hips, of course. He has been really whiny and mad lately too. Sigh...

[LeaPea]

Luna has never been a good sleeper, but this week has been incredibly bad. Plus, she squirms and kicks all night long! I'm thinking it could be teething and a growth spurt, but who knows! I just wish she would sleep at least four hours straight.

[mrs.t]

Same here, Kevin squirms and kicks and wakes up every 3 hours to nurse. He hasn't slept longer than 3 hours at a time since he was about 10 weeks old. Naps last a total of 20 minutes, if I'm lucky I'll get 45.

However, yesterday he figured out how to drag himself across the floor in a military type crawl. He was MUCH happier today, he could actually get the things he wanted. Then we put him in his highchair (we sit him at the table with us even though he isn't eating yet) and he HATED it. He usually loves his high chair but I guess he felt confined.

[sosurreal09]

im doing horible with it. Bi polar runs in my family real bad but i choose not to take meds or anything and 99% of the time i am great. was on zoloft a while back and felt more depressed even though my "moods" were stable but always depressed is just as bad...
so when i am sleep deprived i cant take it.
instant migraine everyday
crying fits
anger fits
i absolutely snap
before i would relax with some mj but since i got preggo i quit and im nursing so i choose not to just in case. it always helped though just a little a week or w/e...oh well life changes haha.

[Hannah32]

This is a tale of two nights:

Friday night: Down at about 8:30. Up again by 10:30. Repeat every 1-2 hours all night long. After the 2 am waking, where he decided he wanted to wrestle my nipple rather than eat, I had to hand him off to dad while I paced up and down my street, trying to control my temper.

The next day, I was angry, exhausted and not really functional. Honestly, I didn't have the energy to parent my child. When he got fussy and couldn't be easily satisfied, I put him in his crib. I don't like letting him cry, but at some point, it really is safer to put the baby down.

Hubby and I went to a party, so we got a break from grandma for about four hours.

Saturday night: We got home a little late, but he was really tired. He slept just about a four hour stretch, then a three hour stretch.

Today? I want to be his mom. I want to figure out why he's fussing. I just love having him around. We're having lots of positive interaction.

I'm DONE expecting myself to be a great mom when I don't get at least four hours of sleep. High expectations like that are making me depressed. I can't do it on no sleep. On no sleep, we get barely functioning mommy, prone to needing to walk away. It's how it's going to be. For his safety and my sanity.

I've said it myself and have read it on this board: Sleep deprivation is torture. No, our babies aren't trying to torture us, but that's the neurological effect of a lack of sleep. When it happens to me, I'm done expecting so much of myself. I'll do the best I can, but I'm going to be aware of my limitations.

[P.J.]

Hi ladies! Just checking in, nice to read all the updates and to all who need one.
My mom just visited for a week and it was intense. Up til then and the first few days of her visit we had a long string of "good" days, meaning Max still needed near-constant attention, but he wasn't fussy all the time and no screaming fits.

Well, then it flipped and for the last three days he's been pretty fussy. Also the last two nights he woke up (he's usually a STTNer, which has been our saving grace in all this) once and twice. Today my mom is gone but MIL is here to help, and I am grateful. But this morning he wouldn't go down for his nap and I nearly lost it.He was soooooo fussy and I had to excuse myself and go let off some steam in the next room. I am just so tired from my mom's visit (she's also high needs, lol, so it's always intense with her although we do get along and she was a big help). Anyway, Max then screamed for about 15 minutes in my arms and promptly nursed to sleep and has been sleeping an hour!!! This so rarely happens. But yeah, missing that first morning nap was awful in terms of fussing and screaming, so I'd rather him have more but shorter naps.

Anyway we're travelling for the first time with Max on Sunday, to Portugal for 10 days. I am sooo nervous. I'm not even so worried about the journey there, but about losing our routine. I feel so dependent on all our routines, especially for getting him to sleep. He's pretty good (usually) about going down for naps and at night, but without the routine he would not sleep ever I don't think. I know we can transfer a lot of it there, but we won't have all our familiar props (glider, Boppy, etc etc) and we don't know exactly what the room will be like (although we have an apt with a separate bedroom luckily). I think he'll be so excited and happy to be in a new environment....so much of his fussiness is boredom....so it may go really really well because of that. Or it could go the other way because we won't be able to adapt to the new routine. We shall see. *breathe*

[mrs.t]

Seems like we have all had some crappy nights lately. Last night I stupidly ate some lasagna knowing that DS has issues when I eat certain dairy products. Needless to say he whined and cried every time he woke up last night and didn't nurse well. I am so tired today, and my patience is pretty limited.

The newest thing is the whining. I thought maybe being more mobile would make him happy, turns out it makes him more whiny. He whines when he can't reach something. He whines when he wants to be in a sitting position. He whines when he's tired. He whines...well, you get the idea. It sucks because I was really enjoying him, he likes to sit up on his own and play, but as soon as something frustrates him, it's a whine fest. Yesterday I was cooking breakfast for myself, which took about 10 minutes, and the whole time he was in the living room yelling and whining.

I don't know about the rest of you, but I am seriously tired of people trying to give me advice about what his problem is. He is frustrated, that is the problem. He's not teething, hungry, in pain, wet, soiled, etc. He wants something that is out of his reach, or he wants to be on the floor, or he wants to be in his high chair, or something else that I can't figure out, but he's not in distress or pain. I have already gone through the checklist of making sure nothing is wrong with him. UGH!

I am starting to appreciate the high needs thing, even if it's completely annoying sometimes. I know that he is just trying to tell me something and can't yet. I can't imagine having a baby who just sits and plays and only cries when he is teething or something (although it would be much more pleasant!). I love my son. It totally makes me feel bad to think about how judgmental I have been in the past when a baby was crying or whining in the grocery store or something, and I would wonder what the parent was doing wrong. Now I know that sometimes it's just the kid you ended up with.

[Hannah32]

Yes, it's like a lottery! You get the easy baby or the not-so-easy baby. Nothing to feel bad about.

I was talking to parents of a baby just a bit older than Sam. He wakes up ONCE to eat at night. Maybe twice.....occasionally.

Sam, on a good night, will sleep 5 hours, eat (takes forever) and then sleep another 3 hours and be ready to start his day after nursing around 4:30. And that's the good night. The bad night is every 2 or less with mega bursts of energy inbetween, LOL. We've been getting some good nights lately.

[TSomm]

Mom of HN baby checking in!

I don't know how I survived the last 7.5 months but I can say yes yes yes to all the things you ladies mention about your babes.

The only thing that works for us is stimulation. We get out of the house as much as possible.

Can't stay... gotta use the baby nap to pee, eat, clean, etc.!

[Hannah32]

Yes! I think some babies just bore easily. I think they want to do *more*.

[momto4plus4]

My mom just got here Monday and already acknowledged how HN mine is! That was helpful-to have someone else "see" it. She noted how he wants to be constantly entertained, takes in everything and wants what he wants when he wants it and is mad when he doesn't get it. It's really helping just to have another adult see how exhausting he is. He is so much like my oldest it's uncanny but she didn't have a temper like he does. It'll be interesting to see what he's like as he grows. DD1, whom he resembles so much, is HN but so easy-going and sweet, just constant.

[P.J.]

Originally Posted by momto4plus4

My mom just got here Monday and already acknowledged how HN mine is! That was helpful-to have someone else "see" it. .

Haha, my mom was here last week and it was the same thing! She was like "Whew! He's really intense and difficult!".

Originally Posted by Liz.Furtado

A Has anyone here tried an amber bead necklace for teething? I hear great things about it but as pagan as I am I still feel like its a bit hoeky sounding...I still hear it works wonders...anyone?

We got one, but honestly for me it was more about it looks cute, and if it can help prevent any pain then hey that's a bonus. Max is only 4 months, he's been wearing it for a month now and I have no idea if it helps or not, or if he has teething pain ~ he drools like a madman all the time and soaks through like 20 bibs a day, but I don't think the teeth have started hurting him yet so we'll see.

Originally Posted by mrs.t

I don't know about the rest of you, but I am seriously tired of people trying to give me advice about what his problem is. He is frustrated, that is the problem. He's not teething, hungry, in pain, wet, soiled, etc. He wants something that is out of his reach, or he wants to be on the floor, or he wants to be in his high chair, or something else that I can't figure out, but he's not in distress or pain. I have already gone through the checklist of making sure nothing is wrong with him. UGH!

I am starting to appreciate the high needs thing, even if it's completely annoying sometimes. I know that he is just trying to tell me something and can't yet. I can't imagine having a baby who just sits and plays and only cries when he is teething or something (although it would be much more pleasant!). I love my son. It totally makes me feel bad to think about how judgmental I have been in the past when a baby was crying or whining in the grocery store or something, and I would wonder what the parent was doing wrong. Now I know that sometimes it's just the kid you ended up with.

I relate to this a lot. Firstly the thing about everyone thinking I must be doing something wrong, or not doing enough, or should be doing something different, because otherwise he'd be content. I know all mamas face unsolicited advice, but having a HN baby somehow attracts it like a magnet and I really have a hard time dealing with that.
And I too used to assume the mom was somehow negligent if I saw her baby crying and screaming. Live and learn.

[braidmama]

Hey guys! Haven't been on here in a few days so just saying hello!
PJ Our Max's sound so very much alike! have fun on your trip! Dp's family is from Portugal and we always say we're gonig to make a trip there sometime. We're getting married next year so perhaps a honeymoon? I hope its beautiful! Let me know!

Ahh, Max has chilled out a bit. Just a bit. Still very needy and fussy. I've felt a lot more like myself since my cycle returned. It has been almost instant. There are still plenty of stressful times but I feel like its gettign better slowly! It still super hard to get anything done around the house. When Max's awake he needs constant stimulation or he gets insanely fussy. When he's napping he's bee a very light sleeper so the slightest noise from across the house will wake him up on the spot. Yikes! I have started keeping a fan on in our bedroom (where he sleeps)- its been really hot here anyway so its nice, and some music on low. I know some people say not to let them get used to needing music to sleep but I am so not thinking about the future right now. Quick relief is the name of the game and it works! So far its just been Iron & Wine...so peaceful and soothing, I listened to on eof their albums nonstop while I was pregnant and needed a little break to unwind so it helps both of us!

Dp's family has been helping out a ton lately, too which is awesome. I'm thinking about going to the gym to lose the baby weight...I'd like to lose about 30 pounds...and they've offered to come over and hangout with him while I'm there but I'm concerned it will interfere with nursing since I already work 6 hours in the am so I'm gone about 7 hours a day. Needless to say I'm holiding out on it a bit and just going for walks with him in the park across the st from our house- which calms him down too! He loves beig outside and it seems to be the only thing to work sometimes when he's fussy.

Okay I'm starting to ramble...gotta go!

[P.J.]

Wow, we do seem to have a lot of parallels in our situations!

Just this week I discovered the soothing effects of music. I have to say, I love me some rock and roll, but for Max right now it's a no-no since he's already so naturally riled up. We've been listening to soft Indian music and chants, classical, and old jazz like Louis Armstrong. And I've noticed it seems to calm him a little bit. They say music is also very very good for promoting language development, and I'm sure it can't hurt so we're trying to have it on a lot of the day now.

And I also need to lose 30 lbs and am eager to get myself to the gym!!! Ugh. We need to find some very part-time childcare though before that can happen and I feel pretty intimidated by the search.

Well, I guess it's October so we should start a new thread sometime soon. Happy October everyone!!!!

[mrs.t]

I definitely find that music sometimes helps! It's especially good when I am trying to get ready and get out of the house and HAVE to leave him for a few minutes, I just put some music on and he remains calm and quiet for a few minutes. Also, he loves it in the car! He actually "sings" in the backseat, which is basically just him going ahhhhh ahhhhhh but he's happy!

I wanted to ask if any of you are using baby sign? I have been pretty bad about using it, and since he's more aware of everything now I'm hoping that it will make a difference. I think it might help with some of the frustration. Either way, it gives me something to do!

[mrs.t]

Join us in our new thread!