preschool teachers- I need your input

[Wild Lupine]

We found out DD got a spot at the local preschool at the last minute- the day before school started. We had been told the week before it was 'extremely unlikely' she'd get a space. So we were very surprised and thrilled. It's the third day and DD loves it.

But.... DH's parents are also visiting for three weeks this month and thinking DD wouldn't be in school we planned family trips with them for this month. The two trips combined would keep DD out of school for about half of the school days in September.

I want to keep DD home from one of the trips (I'll be home with DS anyway)- the longer, less exciting for a preschooler trip - so she misses less school. DH thinks it's a special occasion because his parents live in another country and they don't get to see them very often and that the school will understand the absences.

I teach at the high school level and am colored by the thought of a teenager missing the content of the first month of a college prep level class. Maybe things are different in preschool. Maybe the absences aren't such a big deal, or maybe the first month is even more crucial with all the routines and expectations taught.

So preschool teachers, help me out. What do you think about a student missing about half the days of the first month? If it makes a difference, DD has no special developmental or academic needs that we're aware of, and she blends into groups very, very easily.

[mommy2maya]

I would let her go. Just let the teachers know what your plans are.

[KCMichigan]

It would depend on your child (and school policy).

For one of my DDs it would totally mess up her routine....she would HATE feeling that she does not know the routine and would have a hard time finding playmates when they have already found 'friends'. She would get over it, but the transition back would not be something I would want to do lightly. She needs a routine and structure...she does not like weekends since it is different than school days.

My other DD, would do just fine missing some school. She would be just as happy to go back after a long absence. She makes friends easily and goes with the routines.

Also, look into it. If it is a school with a waiting list--they may have a set policy about vacations, paying tuition, and a certain amount of 'not sick' absences. There is a wide spectrum of policies.

[Evan&Anna's_Mom]

First, you are almost certainly going to have to pay for the full month.I don't know if that matters to you or not, but few schools have any provisions for absenses meaning you don't have to pay.

At our preschool, kids came in and out all the time. Kids started at all different points during the year, and some left for various reasons at times as well. There is much less a feeling of a set "school year".

However, it is hard to bounce in and out of the preschool routine. If it were me, and I had the option, I would group all of the trips together, and then start school. That would probably be less confusing than 1 week at school, 1 week away from school sort of deal. I know the week after a vacation was always hard when mine were that age, so the fewer times you have to repeat the re-adjustment phase the easier it will be.

[whatsnextmom]

I used to teach preschool and never had ANY issues with a child going on an extended trip. I had kids who went to visit family in China for a month, kids who traveled to Mexico for weeks with their parents, ect. The kids we worried about were kids who missed days on a regular basis due to inconsistancy, apathy or inability of parents to get them to school. Kids from secure families can absolutely afford to miss days to travel, to spend time with extended family ect.

It's preschool. She's not going to miss anything she can't catch at a later time. Spending time with family.. that's valuable not only to her but to your DH and his parents.

[Wild Lupine]

Originally Posted by mommy2maya

I would let her go. Just let the teachers know what your plans are.

This is what we've decided to do. All of your responses have helped me get to this point. Thanks!

Originally Posted by KCMichigan

It would depend on your child (and school policy).

Also, look into it. If it is a school with a waiting list--they may have a set policy about vacations, paying tuition, and a certain amount of 'not sick' absences. There is a wide spectrum of policies.

I never even considered there would be an absence policy. It's a public school (with a small fee for tuition), so I should definitely check school policy about this. Maybe there isn't an absence policy for preschool; I don't think they have promotion standards that would be affected by attendance, but it is worth looking into.

And my DD is definitely a social butterfly who could slip into the group very easily when she returns.

Originally Posted by Evan&Anna's_Mom

First, you are almost certainly going to have to pay for the full month.I don't know if that matters to you or not, but few schools have any provisions for absenses meaning you don't have to pay.

It's public school and we're paying so little to begin with it never occurred to me that we wouldn't have to pay when she was absent. We are really very, very lucky she is going there; I guess that's why I've been so bothered about her missing so much, I know how very fortunate she was to get this spot.

Originally Posted by whatsnextmom

I used to teach preschool and never had ANY issues with a child going on an extended trip. I had kids who went to visit family in China for a month, kids who traveled to Mexico for weeks with their parents, ect. The kids we worried about were kids who missed days on a regular basis due to inconsistancy, apathy or inability of parents to get them to school. Kids from secure families can absolutely afford to miss days to travel, to spend time with extended family ect.

It's preschool. She's not going to miss anything she can't catch at a later time. Spending time with family.. that's valuable not only to her but to your DH and his parents.

Thanks, this helps me so much. It's exactly the voice of experience and perspective I need to hear.

[Purple*Lotus]

I teach Pre K for our public school system and in our case, you can only miss a certain amount of days and then your spot is given away. So please check first to make sure that wont happen to you. The parents sign a statement that they acknowledge that before school starts, so perhaps your system is different.

[KCMichigan]

Originally Posted by Bunnyflakes

I teach Pre K for our public school system and in our case, you can only miss a certain amount of days and then your spot is given away. So please check first to make sure that wont happen to you. The parents sign a statement that they acknowledge that before school starts, so perhaps your system is different.

Our preschool is this way....with the exception of a Dr notice for illnesses (any amount of time is excused for illness). If a student (preschool) has too many absences or tardies they can dismiss them and give the spot to the next person on the 'waiting list'. That is why I suggested you check policies! Ours is funded by the state and has to follow certain policies, although school is not mandatory until age 6 here---a student that attends a public preschool can be dismissed for missing more than 10% 'unexcused' absences in a marking period (it does not mean they will be, but they can be if the waiting list is extensive).

It is not a promotional standard, rather it is a funding standard. They only get a certain amount of funding and to get it they have to meet attendance standards. I would especially be concerned that the school would want your DC to be there for 'count' day ( ours is Sept 15th). Attendance that day helps determine funding for the year.

I do agree, though, if they let you---it is preschool. Family time is important! Enjoy it now!

[Peony]

If it is public Pre-K then that changes things. They usually have to adhere to certain attendance standards and can have little to no leeway. The best way to find out is just to ask. If it was a regular preschool then vacations usually are not a big deal.

[Tigerchild]

Ask ASAP. It may be a big problem with a publically funded school, because attendance does affect funding. But you won't know unless you ask. It may be one of the tradeoffs for a subsidized program though; if you cost them a lot of funding by avoidable absences, they may boot you.

[whatsnextmom]

It's not neccessarily a problem. I worked at a state preschool and we would allow long trips (2 or 3 weeks) as long as we knew about them. The problem was when people would take off, not let us know, after a week or two with no response we'd have to replace them and parents would be very upset. However, as long as proper notification was given, even with an attendance policy, it was OK.