'My Mom Told Me' - and other bad advice - Page 2

[Lady Lilya]

Originally Posted by gypsymama2008

I'm not pregnant now so I'm sort of forum-crashing but when I was pregnant. I told my friend we wouldn't circumcising if the baby turned out to be a boy and she said "Well, maybe you should because he might do it himself." (as in circumcise himself) . Ironically this comment actually made me more anti-circ because I couldn't imagine a person who would willingly cut off a piece of their genitalia.

Maybe she was thinking about how a lot of kids cut their own hair at some point.

If my kid was gonna take scissors to his penis, I'd much rather there be as many layers as possible.

Originally Posted by MyFullHouse

My mil apparently told my sil that episiotomies are absolutely necessary. That had my sil so freaked out that she recently told me she'd be having elective c-sections if she has kids.

When my mother was pregnant with me and my sister in the 80s, she was told by her OB that she had to have an episiotomy. She said she'd change OBs, then, and he said "good luck finding one who will allow you not to have an episiotomy." She couldn't find one. Luckily with me she arrived to the hospital last minute and I was out before they could cut her. But with my sister, she got stuck there all day and they did a whole bunch of unwanted stuff. Grrr.

[greenmulberry]

I have to say the stuff my mom had been telling me has seemed like the sanest advice of anyone's!

[Youngfrankenstein]

Originally Posted by Banana731

my mom told me I should drink some beer when I started nursing because it would help my milk come in. She actually bought it for me and gave it to me with a "here, drink it!" Totally silly, but the beer sure did help me relax!

Actually, that's not horrible advice. I've heard it helps with let down, not the milk coming in though.

[macandcheese]

Originally Posted by NewMoonMum

hmm how about my older sister-when pregnant with my son, she sent me a box full of maternity clothes.
She informed me that "the band on maternity pants is meant to be worn underneath your shirt".
Thank goodness I had her to tell me that-I was looking forward to tucking for sure!!

Wait, what? I was really looking forward to rockin' the Ed Grimley look!

[karanyavel]

My mom's always been great. She recognized me as an adult at 18 and stood up for me against other relatives who tried to influence my decisions from that point onwards. That said...

When I had my first child, my mom was concerned about the fact I was breastfeeding. "But how do you know if she's getting enough?" she asked. I think she didn't breastfeed her kids because her breasts don't have ounce markings! She did readily accept my explanation that you could tell by wet diapers, weight gain, etc.

MIL on the other hand...

"Crying helps her lungs develop."
"You can't carry her all of the time!"
"But you'll NEED a crib!"
"If you homeschool, how will she develop socially? She needs to be around other kids her own age!"

...and many more. Glad she lives over 1,000 miles away!

--K

[lillymonster]

Originally Posted by MaerynPearl

OH goodness I also got the 'If you dont put her in school soon she will never learn to get along with other kids' bit about DD... from age 2 on.

I got this a lot....I was told she would never learn to share or take turns without learning from other kids in preschool/daycare. Um...how many 2 years old know how to share? Who teaches them? The PARENTS! 2 years old don't teach other kids how to share, they just push them and take the toy away. LOL, DD is 3 1/2 now and she is pretty much the few kids that shares and offers toys to other kids

[Ellen Griswold]

Originally Posted by NewMoonMum

hmm how about my older sister-when pregnant with my son, she sent me a box full of maternity clothes.
She informed me that "the band on maternity pants is meant to be worn underneath your shirt".
Thank goodness I had her to tell me that-I was looking forward to tucking for sure!!

Please tell me that you took pictures with shirts tucked into the pants just for her.

[Banana731]

Originally Posted by Youngfrankenstein

Actually, that's not horrible advice. I've heard it helps with let down, not the milk coming in though.

Yeah, and there's something also about hops helping with milk supply, it's pretty anecdotal, but I say if it doesn't hurt...

No not horrible, but funny so I thought it might fit in the thread.

[CherryBomb]

Since this is my fourth I don't get much "advice" anymore, but a friend did tell me I was crazy for having my vba2c without an epidural and that I should get one this time. She also thinks I'm crazy for not circumcising because intact penises "look gross." She's generally a very good friend, but yeesh. I try to just stay away from topics I know we're not going to see eye to eye on...

[annablue]

My mom told me not to take baths while pregnant, because she knew someone who lost twins from "getting an infection in the bath." I was scared to take baths for a while, even though I logically know they're harmless, just because I couldn't forget the story!

[nova22]

Eight years ago when I was pregnant with my first, I got the advice that I shouldn't reach over my head while pregnant because it might cause the umbilical cord to wrap around the baby's neck or tie itself in a knot.

I have gotten plenty of "helpful" advice from people who raise an eyebrow at what I'm eating and say "are you SURE you should be eating cheese/fried foods/chocolate/salty foods/red meat?"

I've gotten the "crying strengthens the lungs" bit too. Dr. Sears retorts that crying is good for the lungs like bleeding is good for the veins.

This isn't advice, but when I was pregnant with my first (a boy), one of my coworkers loudly said to me as she walked behind me to our classroom: "I can tell you're having a boy because your butt is getting so big!" (Fortunately I was able to take that lightly, she was joking...but yeah, my butt definitely got big! I was kinda glad about that because I had never had a butt before. )

[WifeofAnt]

Originally Posted by nova22

This isn't advice, but when I was pregnant with my first (a boy), one of my coworkers loudly said to me as she walked behind me to our classroom: "I can tell you're having a boy because your butt is getting so big!" (Fortunately I was able to take that lightly, she was joking...but yeah, my butt definitely got big! I was kinda glad about that because I had never had a butt before. )

(turns around and checks out her stretch marks)
I'd like to lie and say that my butt is the same size but the stretch marks give me away. Its so far the only place I have them!

[MaerynPearl]

My butts big and Im having a girl. Ive actually lost weight in most of my body except my butt!

[Llyra]

Originally Posted by Lady Lilya

Maybe she was thinking about how a lot of kids cut their own hair at some point.

If my kid was gonna take scissors to his penis, I'd much rather there be as many layers as possible.

OMG I can totally see DS trying that, at some point. The other day I caught him trying to cut his own toenails-- he's got one little toe that's like totally mutilated. It was bleeding, and he was concentrating so hard he never noticed.

Gonna have to have a talk with him...

[Aliy]

heard the crying thing, the holding makes them spoiled, and all that junk...

I don't get much advice from my family.. they know i do what feels good for us and I do what I need to do.

Actually with some things it amazing how cooperative my family has been.
Still need to approach the topic of home birth with a few members... I have a foster mom who was a nurse and I know she has supplies so i'm hoping to get some stuff fromher.. not sure how she'll go for the homebirth idea... :S

[Lady Lilya]

Originally Posted by Llyra

OMG I can totally see DS trying that, at some point. The other day I caught him trying to cut his own toenails-- he's got one little toe that's like totally mutilated. It was bleeding, and he was concentrating so hard he never noticed.

Gonna have to have a talk with him...

I think it makes sense that they try to cut hair and toe nails. Those are things that they observe being cut.

It is much less likely for a child to try to cut his penis.

[katroshka]

I remembered some other good ones...

My ex-FIL told me "You may think you're vegan, but there's no way you're making it through this pregnancy. My hippie friend back in the 70's was vegetarian, but once she got pregnant she was eating McDonald's every day!" Yeah, well, 3 pregnancies and 9 years later, still vegan. I know some people start craving meat and whatnot, but it's not a certainty at all! When I'm pregnant, meat, dairy, and eggs gross me out way more than usual. And I'm just SURE McDonald's every day is good for the baby... right.

My grandmother told me that back in her childbearing years (50's), the pediatricians would have her express some milk into a glass, then they'd swirl it around and see if it was thick/ fatty enough to coat the glass, if it wasn't they'd say the milk was no good and that she'd need to formula feed!

And of course I got lots of "Your kids are going to be so dependent on you and never be out of your bed, etc., etc..." But I doubt anyone will say that with this baby, since my daughters as independent as you could imagine, people are telling me all the time how amazing it is that they are so independent and confident. Of course, there's always room to be surprised. Who knows what I'll get this time around, but nothing so far!

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

Originally Posted by WifeofAnt

What bad advice have you gotten lately? Pregnancy/Birth/Parenting/Breastfeeding? Who was it from?


My stepmom (doesn't have any bio-children) - "Actually you want him to cry, it strengthens their lungs"

I heard that twice once from my mom and again from my MIL.

[WifeofAnt]

Oh cravings are just that, cravings. I've never had one strong enough that I couldn't ignore it. I've ignored hunger completely for a video game in the past.

Since DH is going to be deployed for a year after the baby is born I'm not co-sleeping for the LO's benefit, I'm doing it for my own. I need someone to cuddle me so I don't feel so lonely.

[butterflies]

At various times we've gotten all the comments about how we'd "have to let her cry" to fall asleep, about how co-sleeping would mean they'd "never sleep alone", about how shocking it was that we wouldn't circumcise ds... but by now people mostly keep quiet.

I think the weirdest one ever was a taxi driver in SF who insisted that I should not drink cold liquids while pregnant or else the baby would get too big. only hot ones. dh and i just tried not to look at each other because we were giggling over that for the rest of the ride.