Disgusted with carrying around pregnancy pounds

[livinlovinlaughin]

I seem to be one of those lucky mommies who can not lose weight while breastfeeding. I have about 40lbs to lose and have been trying for almost 2 years now without any luck. My 22 month old DS still nurses at before bed a bit over night, for naps and a little through the day. I eat wholesome foods and exercise. I have tried adjusting my calories up and down and increased exercise. Nothing seems to help. Over the last 2 years Ihave lost and gained the same 5 pounds with no consistency. The weight goes up and down with no correlation to my healthy lifestyle. I have had my thyroid checked twice which came back fine. My thought is that if some women can't lose while breastfeeding it has to be the hormones affecting metabolism. Right? So, how can I balance them naturally so I can get this weight off? I try not to look in the mirror but I really can not handle this much longer. It really gets to me! I know I would have so much more energy and feel so much better about myself which in turn would make me such a better mommy. I feel like I am missing out on my DS growing up because I am so consumed by feeling so bad about myself. I do my best to ignore it but that only lasts so long.

My question is to those mommies who did not lose any weight while nursing. Do I have to wean to lose weight? If he cuts back on nursing will I start to lose or do I have to stop completely? I fear that there is no guarantee to this weight coming off after weaning. What were your experiences.

I planned to CLW in hopes that he might be done before 3yrs. Is it still CLW if you guide them a little?

Please help. Any words of wisdom is welcomed!

[MammaG]

I don't seem to lose weight while nursing, either. I will tell you that with baby #2, I did start to lose weight when he was around 2.5-3. He weaned just after he turned 3, and then I got pg with #3 about two weeks later, so I don't know if I'd have lost weight after weaning. #1 and #2 are only 17 mos apart, so I have no idea what would have happened with the first pg...I tandem nursed the first two.

My youngest is nearly 10 mos and I'm sick of all the extra fat, too. I know the advice is to not diet when nursing, but I'm thinking of trying something....anything.

I think it's a losing battle though. I have the fat in mostly my belly and breasts which speaks to me of a hormonally driven attempt to sustain my baby...I think my body feels it needs that fat to nurse (and I got my period back at 6 weeks after every pg, even when I tandem-nursed. I tried DILIGENT ecological BF this time and still got it at 6 weeks).

I guess I will keep trying to eat healthy foods (not an issue really...we don't eat junk foods) and keep trying to add physical activities to my daily life. And, I guess I'll keep trying to love that this body, which does not fit my idea of physical beauty, is just what my babies need.

I'm sorry. That didn't help much. Just wanted to let you know you've got company.

[liberal_chick]

Two words: weight watchers. I was having the same issues (although I was still nursing an infant, not a toddler) and started the WW lactation program in Sept. By December I had lost about 25 or so pounds with no noticable decrease in my milk supply.

[livinlovinlaughin]

Originally Posted by liberal_chick

Two words: weight watchers. I was having the same issues (although I was still nursing an infant, not a toddler) and started the WW lactation program in Sept. By December I had lost about 25 or so pounds with no noticable decrease in my milk supply.

That is just it. I am a weight watchers lifetime member. It is my lifestyle. It worked so well the first time. Fat just melted off me. Now, nothing works. I really thought I would get the weight right off after birth. I eat healthy and followed ww (my lifestyle) throughout pregnancy. I am also a fitness instructor and taught classes (working out along with them) all the way until the end of pregnancy. I do not know why it is not working for me this time. I am so frustrated!

[livinlovinlaughin]

Originally Posted by MammaG

I don't seem to lose weight while nursing, either. I will tell you that with baby #2, I did start to lose weight when he was around 2.5-3. He weaned just after he turned 3, and then I got pg with #3 about two weeks later, so I don't know if I'd have lost weight after weaning. #1 and #2 are only 17 mos apart, so I have no idea what would have happened with the first pg...I tandem nursed the first two.

My youngest is nearly 10 mos and I'm sick of all the extra fat, too. I know the advice is to not diet when nursing, but I'm thinking of trying something....anything.

I think it's a losing battle though. I have the fat in mostly my belly and breasts which speaks to me of a hormonally driven attempt to sustain my baby...I think my body feels it needs that fat to nurse (and I got my period back at 6 weeks after every pg, even when I tandem-nursed. I tried DILIGENT ecological BF this time and still got it at 6 weeks).

I guess I will keep trying to eat healthy foods (not an issue really...we don't eat junk foods) and keep trying to add physical activities to my daily life. And, I guess I'll keep trying to love that this body, which does not fit my idea of physical beauty, is just what my babies need.

I'm sorry. That didn't help much. Just wanted to let you know you've got company.

I am wondering if you changed anything when you started losing weight when your baby was 2.5-3? More physical activity? change in diet? Better sleep?

I also feel like it is a losing battle but can not accept that and I am going crazy!! Everytime I see a picture of how tiny I was before I got pregnant, I can not wait to be there and happy again! When I see a picture of me now it depresses me.

What really makes me very sad is that I feel like I do not have an option of having another baby because I know I can not handle gaining any more weight on top of this. In the meantime, my DS just keeps getting older. If and when I ever lose this weight I do not think I am going to want to gain it right back with another pregnancy. I really feel like I have no choice. Maybe we are meant to only have one.

[lifeguard]

Oy! I could have written so much of your post.

I have not lost one single pound from my pregnancy - I literally weigh the same as the day before ds was born. I've gone up & down about 5 but it never means anything.

Cutting back on bfing hasn't made a difference. I'm not willing to wean him 'cause what if I still didn't lose?

I lost 70lbs before ds doing what I am doing now but it is not coming off.

All that said the way that I have come to feel a little more peace about my body is to change the goals of my workouts. I work out HARD & am training for powerlifting. Having a purpose other than (non-existant) weightloss makes the workouts feel more worthwhile.

What's great about it is that my fitness level has improved soooo much & I can appreciate what my body is capable of. This past weekend I went backpacking with a friend on a VERY challenging trail (lots of hills, uneven terrain) with a pack weighing about 35lbs (plus the 60+ I need to lose!). And I did it!!!

Do I look in the mirror (or worse, see pictures) of myself & feel awful sometimes - most definitely but at least I know I am healthy, I'm setting a good example for ds & creating a positive environment for our family to be healthy in. I remind myself daily that if I continue to do the correct things the weight will come off eventually when the time is right (I have had loooong plateaus before ds in losing weight).

As for the despair over the prospect of having another baby & that adding more weight to my body I will admit I have cried over this. It is just so discouraging. But I take comfort in the fact that as someone who is already overweight I do not need to gain much weight to sustain a healthy pregnancy so if I can continue a healthy lifestyle throughout a pregnancy I won't end much worse off than I am now. I'd rather be fat than miss children I feel I should have had.

I truly feel it's a fallacy that weightloss is a simple calories in/calories out equation - there are just soooo many factors that play into & the truth is it is much easier for some & much harder for other. Unfortunately I'm in the harder camp.

[newcastlemama]

I have a hard time losing the last 10 when BFing and it was in my upper body/stomach too (Which is unusual for me). Nursing was wearing me down and my naturopath said that my adrenals were probably wearing down from lack of sleep and the stress on my body. (I had blood tests too) I nightweaned dd and workout at the gym and that helped my energy increase and helped my weight a tiny....I nursed her until 2.5 when I got pregnant again....I will see what happens after this baby. Also, sitting aorund nursing constantly did not help either!

I am trying different way of workout out and tweaking my diet so that may make a difference too (FYI-I am not "dieting" while I am pregnant). I tried primal blueprint workouts but I think I need more cardio and a little less fat to lean out.

[Katie T]

Hugs to you! I know all about this as my sister, mom and I all can.not.loose.weight while nursing. I have been pg or nursing for the last 5yrs so only have the post nursing experience of my first but I couldn't loose weight while nursing and then when I decided (several yrs after weaning) that I wanted to get back into shape it was actually easy and I lost 50lbs in a yr. I did it nice and slow and healthy. I then got pg with ds and when he was 12m and still nursing I got pg with dd. That is the only time lost weight while nursing was during the first half of pg even though I ate healthy food all.the.time. I am still nursing and still over weight. I am honestly not looking forward to eating without feeling guilty.

I did try to loose weight a couple months ago by cutting out just a couple hundred calories but my milk became almost nonexistent. Not worth it at this point. I figure I can either be fat and nurse or be skinny and not. I have lots of life to be skinny so I nurse while I can lol.

Hope you figure something out but I think as soon as you wean you will be able to loose the weight. Maybe knowing that will make it easier to clw if that is something you would like to do.

[Parker'smommy]

I don't think that weaning will help you lose weight. My experience has been different with every kid.

My first- weight came off easily ( all my weight PLUS another 25 lbs)....BUT...I had severe PPD and I wasn't eating enough. And as a testament to breastfeeding...my child still gained well with poor nutrition by me. He was a stealthy 24 pounds at a year. ( I also did WW at around 14 months and lost an additional 20 lbs ( yes...I was overweight before getting pregnant)

My second....did.not.lose.the.weight. I lost the initial 12 pounds or so after the birth, but that was it. FInally lost a little bit more when I got more sleep!

My third pregnancy ( 20 week loss, but I had gained 20 pounds during the pregnancy). I had a difficult time losing the weight....but I was not sleeping well.

5th pregnancy- ( 17 week loss with a 20 plus gain)- again....didn't lose it quickly at all.

6th pregnancy- baby is almost 4 weeks old and I've lost all 28 pounds that I gained plus 4 lbs so far. I'm getting decent sleep for a newborn ( up every 3 hours but I've mastered side lying nursing...yah!) and I'm eating normal...not restricting anything...just eating to hunger.

I think sleep is the issue for me. There are studies out there that say that you can't lose weight if you don't get enough sleep at night. So while I don't think weaning would help you lose weight.....nightweaning and having babe sleep better might?!

[livinlovinlaughin]

Originally Posted by lifeguard

Oy! I could have written so much of your post.

I have not lost one single pound from my pregnancy - I literally weigh the same as the day before ds was born. I've gone up & down about 5 but it never means anything.

Cutting back on bfing hasn't made a difference. I'm not willing to wean him 'cause what if I still didn't lose?

I lost 70lbs before ds doing what I am doing now but it is not coming off.

All that said the way that I have come to feel a little more peace about my body is to change the goals of my workouts. I work out HARD & am training for powerlifting. Having a purpose other than (non-existant) weightloss makes the workouts feel more worthwhile.

What's great about it is that my fitness level has improved soooo much & I can appreciate what my body is capable of. This past weekend I went backpacking with a friend on a VERY challenging trail (lots of hills, uneven terrain) with a pack weighing about 35lbs (plus the 60+ I need to lose!). And I did it!!!

Do I look in the mirror (or worse, see pictures) of myself & feel awful sometimes - most definitely but at least I know I am healthy, I'm setting a good example for ds & creating a positive environment for our family to be healthy in. I remind myself daily that if I continue to do the correct things the weight will come off eventually when the time is right (I have had loooong plateaus before ds in losing weight).

As for the despair over the prospect of having another baby & that adding more weight to my body I will admit I have cried over this. It is just so discouraging. But I take comfort in the fact that as someone who is already overweight I do not need to gain much weight to sustain a healthy pregnancy so if I can continue a healthy lifestyle throughout a pregnancy I won't end much worse off than I am now. I'd rather be fat than miss children I feel I should have had.

I truly feel it's a fallacy that weightloss is a simple calories in/calories out equation - there are just soooo many factors that play into & the truth is it is much easier for some & much harder for other. Unfortunately I'm in the harder camp.

Wow we are very similiar! I too have lost and gained the same 5lbs, staying right where I was right before birth. Why have we not even lost the weight of our babies, placenta, fuilds etc.?

A few years before pregnancy I lost over 80lbs doing the same as now. As I said, it is my lifestyle. Then it came off easily.

I wish I could accept being overweight to have more children but I truly can not handle it. I already suffer from depression, which is mostly under control, if I gained any more weight I know it would not be under control, which would not be healthy for me or my family. That is why I feel as though I do not have a choice.

I was a healthy weight when we ot pregnant and continued my healthy lifestyle (eating and exercising) throughout pregnancy. I tried hard to keep my weight gain low. No matter what I did I gained a pound a week. I feel like as soon as I got pregnant I lost control of my weight, which is why I feel like it could be my hormones in control.

Until now, I belived on the science of losing weight but you are so right. There is a lot more involved. That is why my lifestyle has improved since giving birth and gaining knowledge. I have cut out proccessed foods and try to avoid toxins and hormones in food.

Originally Posted by Parker'smommy

I think sleep is the issue for me. There are studies out there that say that you can't lose weight if you don't get enough sleep at night. So while I don't think weaning would help you lose weight.....nightweaning and having babe sleep better might?!

I agree that sleep is important. I sleep well. We co-sleep and I get up to 8hrs of sleep most nights.

[mamaw/two]

hugs: I do think that as your baby begins to cut back on nursing you will probably return to your normal size. I am also a mommy that has almost no luck in losing weight while nursing! I also have about 40-50lbs to lose and understand completely when you say it makes you cry to see pics of yourself, ME TOO. Here's my personal experience... Baby #1 was about 30lbs overweight after she was born, at about 4 monthes pp I began working out (pilates, yoga, and walks) and eating healthier...by 10 monthes pp I had gained 5 more lbs. I threw in the towel and quit exercising and quit eating quite so healthy. By 12 monthes pp I had lost 20lbs??? I started working out again and by the time she was 16 monthes the weight was gone. With #2 I had about 35lbs to lose, but didn't stress to much until she was about a yr old I managed to lose 5 lbs and was pregnant again by the time she was 15 monthes old. After baby #3 I had 50lbs to lose and did exercise quite a bit, but it didn't work, suddenly at 9 monthes old I lost 20lbs without even trying...I kept on working out but no more weight came off. I got pregnant again when he was 21 monthes old. After baby #4 I have worked out more than every before, but yet I sit here at 16 monthes pp 10lbs heavier than when he was one month old. I have continued to eat healthier as I've learned more over the years. We make almost everything from scratch and even raised our own chickens this year so we could have organic, free range meat that we could afford! So my diet is much better now than 10 yrs ago. I have also been nursing/tandem nursing and/or pregnant for the past 9 1/2 yrs., so I probably have some adrenal fatigue going on that is affecting hormones and weight loss. Even though I am heavier than I would like to be, I wouldn't wean a child over it or let it stop me from having more children. I figure that after we are done having children (dh says only one more) and the nursing years are over, it will probably just come off on it's own. Like a pp said, I have lots of yrs to be skinny but these precious yrs of nursing babies will be gone before I know it!

[AdamsV88]

I weigh about 10 lbs lighter than I did when I gave birth to my second daughter... 14 lbs on a good day. I still have 25-30 lbs left to lose and it just isnt comiing off either. I get frustrated. I look at myself in the mirror and feel fat and unattractive. If it werent for my SO telling me how sexy I still am and still being intimate with me, my self esteem would be in the gutter. I dont even like having pictures taken of me anymore and I use to LOVE being in front of a camera.... good luck ladies. I am also doing the CLW and I know I have a long while longer before she does wean which means carrying around this weight and this pudge a while longer too