B&B told us we can't co-sleep?

[femalephish]

I am going for an overnight with my family and we booked a room at a medium sized B&B online. I got an email from the owner and she said, "the room that you picked cannot accomidate 2 adults and a child". I wrote back, explaining that my 'one child' is a baby and she sleeps with us in bed at home and would be sleeping in bed with us on our trip. She wrote back saying she wasn't "comfortable" with that and the "fire marshall" is really strict about these things. Could we bring a pack n play for the baby to sleep in?

First- I think having a pack n play in a small room is much more of a fire danger than having a toddler in bed with us. DH says we should just lie, bring the pack n play and have her sleep with us anyway. But I just really hate lying and I don't feel like I should have to lie. Cosleeping is safe! I just feel really discouraged. I feel like I'm always defending my parenting choices. Even to strangers!

I think I just needed to rant to people who would understand... but what would you do?

[mamazee]

Most B&Bs that I've known don't even accept children. Is it possible they're trying to tell you they don't accept children?

[pinky]

I'm with your DH. If it's easy to just bring the pack-n-play, just do it. And then sleep how you usually do. It's not like they'll be doing a middle of the night inspection.

[prothyraia]

If it's an issue with the fire marshal (i.e. max occupancy of the room) then I don't think it matters if the baby is in your bed or in a pack and play. There's still too many people in the room. So....if they told you to bring it....that doesn't make any sense at all.

[dachshundqueen]

I have also run into this issue with a bed and breakfast and other hotels. I generally have to rent a larger room for the night.

In the case of one place, I ended up with a cabin instead of a room with a king size to accommodate the fire marshall requirements.

In another B&B, I rented a room with 2 twins and a king size bed, but we still co-slept.

They do have to cover their hineys WRT fire code.

Liz

[Magali]

I'd bring a pack n play and not use it...even though it doesn't make any sense why in the event of a fire your baby being in bed with you would be a big problem, as opposed to the pack n play .

[mommy2maya]

Was the suggestion to bring the pack and play from the b&b?

[kittywitty]

I would pick a different B&B. I wouldn't patronize a place that was using excuses to exclude my children.

[rhiOrion]

That's silly. It makes sense if the total number of people in the room is limited to two, and that baby counts as a person. But bringing a packnplay does not make there only be two people in the room.

[Lady Lilya]

I would e-mail back that you are bringing a portable crib. Then bring it. There is no lying there. You aren't saying that you will use it, but you are letting them infer that.

Then if they still have a problem with 3 individuals in a room meant for 2, they can say so.

[just_lily]

It sounds like the issue is maximum occupancy, not cosleeping.

[Mackenzie]

It sounds like the P&P idea was your own and not the B&Bs, right? If so, then the max occupancy regulation is over the room, not the bed... Did you inquire about a 3 person room?

[Melaniee]

Originally Posted by prothyraia

If it's an issue with the fire marshal (i.e. max occupancy of the room) then I don't think it matters if the baby is in your bed or in a pack and play. There's still too many people in the room. So....if they told you to bring it....that doesn't make any sense at all.

Yeah, that. Lame. I wouldn't have expected an B&B owner to ALSO be imparting their family values on you. But then again, I've never been to a little B&B, just bigger places.

Originally Posted by Magali

I'd bring a pack n play and not use it...even though it doesn't make any sense why in the event of a fire your baby being in bed with you would be a big problem, as opposed to the pack n play .

If you own or can borrow one, that's what I'd do.

[JudiAU]

Most B&Bs don't want children and especially don't want babies. I think you are getting a not so subtle hint....

[femalephish]

Originally Posted by mommy2maya

Was the suggestion to bring the pack and play from the b&b?

Yes, this was the INNKEEPERS idea. She wrote me in an emai, "Can you bring a pack n play for the baby to sleep in?"

The website even says that they are a child-friendly place.

[mamazee]

Then they'er just trying to limit their liability. I'd bring a pack and play so they've done their due diligence thing, and then sleep how I wanted.

[UberMama]

Bring a P&P and just have baby sleep with you in bed. A small hassle to bring the P&P, but it works out then.

[odenata]

Honestly, I wouldn't go to that B&B. If it was a fire issue, as she stated, a pack and play doesn't change that. It sounds like she is making excuses because she isn't comfortable with your parenting decisions.

You have much more interaction with the owner of a B&B than at a hotel or such, which is why I like them, but it also means that if that owner is nosy/annoying/rude, your trip will be much less fun. I wouldn't bother with her.

[babygirlsmama]

I totally agree with the last response. The point being that I would already be put-off by the whole situation, and it would ruin the good vibes I would want on my vacation. I might pick another place. I'm now thinking that there are a few upsides to the sterile chain hotels.

[Princess ConsuelaB]

Bring the pack&play and cosleep anyhow, this is what we always did. The innkeeper is giving you an "out" that also covers her own backside regulation-wise.