How do you keep going?

[aprilmom]

After 3 years of IF - we called it quits in Aug. '09. Our last IUI came up negative and we had agreed we were done. We also agreed never to prevent a pregnancy as we would gladly welcome a child. Well - we eneded up pregnant in May only to be told in late June it was a Blighted Ovum. After the m/c I was ready to return to life and norma... but DH is ready to 'try' again. I am not sure I can ever go back to living in 2 week periods and taking tests only to get another negative. I didn't take a test in May until I was almost a week late and repulsed by food... I couldn't stomach seeing another negative result. So, how do you still keep going on??

[Tear78]

I'm so sorry, hon. I don't know. I think for me I'd need to have definitive proof we could never conceive. Then I'd still hope for a miracle. I just don't know how to "move on..." But I definitely am hitting my limit for willingness to "try." Sending you hugs!

[missme]

I've never conceived (15 IUIs), but I keep going because I can't give up on becoming a mother. If not IUI, IVF. If not IVF, adoption.

My situation is different, though. I don't have sperm at home so I have to buy it. How I wish I did, so I could be trying all the time. But perhaps it's more awful to wonder if you're pregnant every single cycle. It hurts horribly either way, I guess.

I send you my love.
Mary

[Starr]

Its hard, me and my DH have unsuccessfully been TTC for 7 years. We have taken mini breaks here and there to keep our sanity but once again we are trying. But we are both on board. Each time we commit to trying I feel like I've stepped on a rollercoaster. I think its something you both have to be on the same page about as far what to expect and what your limits are for trying.

[KellyTTC#1]

aprilmom: I don't really know the answer. I think if the IVF cycle didn't work out I was prepared to quit trying.

So I guess to answer your question, as you said in your post we likely would have agreed never to prevent a pregnancy and gladly welcome a child but living in 2 week periods for 3 years of TTC it was really taking a toll on me especially and not good for my mental health. I wasn't really sure how I/we would deal with that decision and if we would revisit it from time to time.

I agree with Starr in that it's something you both have to be on the same page about as far what to expect/limits are for trying. It's not an easy decision.