PT ec'd 1 yo - freaks out at diaper changes

[winterv]

Calling all psych majors!! No seriously, I gotta know what's going on in my kid's head... What do you think?

He used to do his poop every morning on the potty, no problem. I'd catch the pees here and there. Now he's 14 mos, and he doesn't want to sit on the potty at all. When I can get him on it and distract him, he sits and doesn't go. One minute later, nakey-bum, he'll pee or poop on the floor. Usually he likes to do it when I'm not around--like he wants privacy(?)

I know, sounds like a normal potty strike, but here's the kicker. He will freak out at diaper changes--mostly the poop ones--to the point that I can't even clean him off without a wrestling match. He cries, screams, kicks. He does NOT want that poopy diaper change! Also, he's starting to get pissed when I put a clean diaper on him too!

I don't know what to do, I've checked past threads for some info, but found none. I would gladly give up on the ec for a while like some people do for a potty pause, but he's giving me such a problem with diaper changes!

p.s. He never signed for going, I would always just initiate potty time, grunt a little, and he would do his poop. This was the morning routine for months.

[heatherr30]

I don't have any advice other than just wanted to say, I think diaper changes are a struggle for most toddlers! It probably has nothing to do with EC and everything to do with not having time for potty OR changing mat.

I would just keep on encouraging the potty and making it fun, also giving him a toy or something to distract him on the changing mat. Hopefully he'll move on to another "battle'" soon!

[crunchynerd]

I encountered problems with my DS at about the age when he started walking. He wanted nothing to do with going on the potty, loved running off and doing it on the floor.

I found out a lot of other people had the same problem, usually starting around walking age.

I even found out that in China, it is recognized generally that 10 months or so is a "difficult period" but there, unlike here, by then they have crotchless pants on and can squat down and go ANYWHERE outside where they happen to be, and people are a lot more relaxed about it.

It's heartening to know that this happens even in a place where diapers aren't the norm... but it's also kind of sobering, to think that maybe, in absence of a society where they can run around crotchless and squat down wherever they happen to be, we aren't equipped to deal with this "difficult period" by allowing them to do that?

I dunno. I know EC works when they are younger, but also remember all too well going back to diapers when my son got to where he preferred peeing all over the place, and absolutely refused to sit still for it on a potty.

I am having a baby this winter, and want to EC again, but also am wondering whether it wouldn't be more peaceful all round if I just gave in to my cultural presets, and just did cloth diapering, without EC, and skipped the whole headache of the "difficult period".

It's a toss-up.

[crunchynerd]

Oh yeah... you reminded me... I knew that starting at walking age, a lot of us otherwise successful EC moms were going nuts because our toddling babies suddenly wanted nothing to do with the potty OR diapers!
But now that you mention the thing about toddlers and diaper changes also, yes, just recently, I saw it in action again: my friend with her 18 month old, screaming his head off when having his diaper changed.
He was never EC'd, just fulltime cloth diapers, and just like my DD who was also fulltime cloth, was a struggling screaming little mess when he hit that age, during diaper changes.

So it looks like the beginning walking period is one where, whether they are EC or just cloth diapered (or any diapered, really), they can often turn into struggling screaming unhappy little monsters about having to stop running around at all, whether it's for a diaper change, or a potty...

We just aren't going to get out of that period without headaches, are we?

Originally Posted by heatherr30

I don't have any advice other than just wanted to say, I think diaper changes are a struggle for most toddlers! It probably has nothing to do with EC and everything to do with not having time for potty OR changing mat.

I would just keep on encouraging the potty and making it fun, also giving him a toy or something to distract him on the changing mat. Hopefully he'll move on to another "battle'" soon!

[dogretro]

Congratulations, your child is normal!

Totally, completely, fully normal phase. My kid did it, my friends' kids did it, my old daycare kids did it. Not all young toddlers flip out over diaper changes, but A LOT of them do. It really makes you understand why all-in-one cloth & disposable diapers are so popular

Like everything else, it will pass. My kid went from a kicking screaming mess to walking over and laying down on folded flat diapers that had to be snappied on!