Small gripe about this forum - Page 2

[tnrsmom]

Originally posted by bokchoy

And I do think it's clique-ish here, there's been a few threads where they're talking about an immenent stocking but won't say which store they're stalking. Someone will ask outright but no one will share which store is being stalked for fear of more competition. THAT'S what really bugs me now. Not that I stalk but still, I hate this "I know something you don't know" stuff.

ITA!! If you are not willing to share what you are stalking, then don't post about it. I think it is like a nasty schoolyard bully. Could we grow up a bit? If I am stalking a hard to find diaper, I usually do not post about it. I don't make fun of those who don't know about it either.

[DreamingMama]

Yes

I agree with this post. I really find the diaper care threads to be super boring as there is a resource section for that. I think the fast moving pace of the board as it is very exciting and I enjoy seeing what every one is getting, has or is in the mail. It is great and I do not find it like a commercial at all.

Originally posted by allformyboys
Well the problem is, that diaper care/ basic use is a top that doesn't really change, so to keep posting the same things over and over get old, we do have a diapering resources section that has all these topics covered, that never really change.

The product talk and the new finds is what keeps the board fresh and changing and keeps people coming back (IMO) I think if all we talked about was how many times you rinse your diapers and how to hand wash wool we would be awful boring!

Not that I always feel 'in the know' about all the products and things people use/try, I don't use pocket diapers really, but I still enjoy looking and hearing about them. I am happy with our system but I do enjoy reading about it.

I don't feel that the board is cliquish though, to me a clique is when someone is excluded or shuned when they try and join in and aren't excepted. To me anyone that jumps in here with a post about whatever is usually greeted with warm open arms.

[ustasmom]

I don't think that stockings should be posted at all. If someone is looking for something in particular, then they will check the website on their own. But when it gets announced, a huge number of mamas swarm it, and it crashes. This, in turn, takes time away from the WAHM who could be working on more instock items.

Like I said before, I would like to see a new forum under diapering that ladies can feel free to post about catches (after the store is sold out or close to it). Maybe that would help those who are on a diaper diet to not be so tempted.

Just a thought.

[kasumi]

Originally posted by tnrsmom
ITA!! If you are not willing to share what you are stalking, then don't post about it. I think it is like a nasty schoolyard bully. Could we grow up a bit? If I am stalking a hard to find diaper, I usually do not post about it. I don't make fun of those who don't know about it either.

[Carolinamidwife]

Also, I think due to the fact that tone is hard to express online sometimes what feels like "making fun" is really just playing around. I don't take it personally if someone is all hush hush about where they are stalking, I understand it. As with the last fluffymail stocking, it was pandemonium. I think if you are interested in something all you have to do is join the mailing list and you will know when she stocks. I tend to not say anything when I am stalking but I do come here ASAP when I am done to alert others.

Or PM the person. I get PMs all the time asking me who I am stalking and I ALWAYS give links. I also ask and I always am told.

I think, as with the debate over "diaper art", why people buy or buy A LOT is subjective. For a lot of us diapering is a hobby, for others prefolds and proraps float our boats more than enough. To each her own. I think this board is exactly like any other hobby/specific interest board, only more interesting and definitely more hilarious. I know I love hearing about someone's awesome score almost as much as I love scoring myself!

[pinkmommy]

I definitely see where the OP is coming from. I am relatively new here - have just been posting for a couple of months. I was not into hyena diapers before posting/reading here, but well...I have been sucked in. Don't get me wrong -- I've enjoyed it. However, I know I need to take a step back and not get so involved/obsessed with diapers.

Funny -- I was just thinking about this question: If we don't talk about hyena diapers or diaper trends, what *can* we talk about here and have it still be fresh? I agree that there are only so many coversations we can have about washing diapers, rash, etc. Ideas? I was thinking it would be good to figure out topics that weren't necessarily hyena related but somehow related to diapering -- but not the same ole' same ole'.

I know that many people don't feel there are cliques here, but I do see it a bit. I don't mind (mostly) and feel it is normal where you have a community of people who have a common interest and have built relationships (be it online relationships). I think if you are part of clique, you might not see it in the same light as someone who is new. I have definitely felt (at times) that my posts are not as "popular" -- I know it sounds juvenile and to an extent it is, but I'm just trying to explain how I feel. I feel like I am starting to get to know people here and those feelings have diminished, but I want to remember what it feels like so that other new people or people who don't necessarily ride the hyena wave can also feel like a part here.

I am not saying following the hyena thing is wrong. I do feel there are benefits -- nice products, supporting WAHMs, relaxation, and fun. For me, I am just looking for a way to take it down a notch but still feel a part here. The reason why I do want to stay a part of things here is because there are very few places I can go and talk about this kind of stuff. Who else would "get it" if I enjoy browsing thru pictures of someones stash on a Saturday night?

[Ember]

All the diaper care and washing questions are at anyone's fingertips at any time. It's in the resource section. If someone has a specific question all they need to do is to post it on the forum and it will be addressed. It's not like those posts are ignored. Just speak up if you don't see a topic covered that you would like to hear about.
There are so many topics posted and all are titled, if I'm not interested then I just don't click on it.
I do not stalk and I also watch my diaper budget but I am grateful for the heads up on all the new WAHM diapers available. How else would we find these sites? We also get to hear feedback on these sites before we have to spend our money to try it out. We can read other people's opinion and ask specific questions we may have.
Again, if I'm not interested in the topic or don't want to be tempted then I just don't click on it. If I have a specific question then I speak up and ask.
I think this forum is perfect just the way it is. It addresses the interests of many. And it's an avenue to find out anything you need to know if you just speak up.

[cortsmommy]

I like the board and I like that we talk about good places to shop etc. I just hate when the same person keeps plugging the same business over and over and over and over...makes me think to myself: "I hope she's getting paid for advertising."

[Carolinamidwife]

I'm very guilty of that... can I ask why you don't like it?

[weetzie]

IF you are referring to the post directly above yu, its because its spam

[Brayg]

why would it be spam if someone comes and says "I'm looking for a ______ that does _____" and you mention a name?

I know I'm "guilty" of plugging FCB and LC dipes. I them. They usually fall under every category for me (absorbent, cute, etc) and when someone asks, I tell 'em. Doesn't sound like spam to me...

[allformyboys]

Originally posted by weetzie
IF you are referring to the post directly above yu, its because its spam

It is only spam if the WAHM ASKS the poster to post it, or if they are benifiting directly (like they ARE the WAHM or getting a bonus from the WAHM for the posting) otherwise it is someone who loves the product and is excited about it!

I talk about Sugarbums diapers a lot, they are the majority of my stash and I genuinely love them, Heidi has never asked me to post anything and I have never benifited in anyway from my postings so this is not spam. I have the product, I like the product and I am not getting anything for speaking about it. Hence not spam.

[pinkmommy]

There is a difference between raving a spaming. I thought Spam is when someone promotes their own product? However, if I happen to like a particular diaper and talk about it often, that is just raving - and I think that is good because it helps people to know what products are good.

I do think that talking in a negative way about products here is a bit frowned upon. I guess there are other sites to look at for more info about the pros AND the cons of diapers.

[~Megan~]

That sounds good to me! We want to talk about the new things we are getting and to show our cute babes in dipes but we also need to ask important questions..
I think a while back we had started to do a daily post for fluffymail. Maybe we could do something like that for pictures too?

[WithHannahsHeart]

I can see where Darshani is coming from, up to a point. It does irk me when people hoard all the 'diaper art' and don't leave any for those whove not been able to try things (especially when they later admit to not even using said diapers ). But if they have the money or the credit to do so, it's their right.

However, i don't find it cliqueish here at all. And there is only so much talk of washing that can go on... It is fun and lighthearted to talk about what we love about diapering, certain diapers, what we would liket to try, etc. I generally only see one thread at any given time about "what are you waiting on/what did you get". The rest have recently been questions about wool, questions about cute inexpensive covers, celebrating converting to cd'ing or getting someone to switch, what kind of newborn diapers are best, etc. In my mind, not an excessive amount of discussion about specific pricey, special wahm dipes

[Carolinamidwife]

OK, sorry, but that is not SPAM. As it has already been defined SPAM would be from the WAHM herself.

Further to that... the reason I rave about things (i.e. Kiwi-Pie) is because I love it, I think you will love it, and I want us all to love it. I don't ever rave to boost a WAHMs business. I raved so much about 1 WAHM now I cannot even score when she stocks!

I like it when people rave, it lets me know something is quality and worth checking out. I see nothing wrong with it. I mean, which is it? Bad for raving or bad for keeping it to yourself???:

[4boybarians]

Also guilty of raving about the same products over and over. I can't even begin to understand what's wrong with that. I don't see why it would bother someone if I give my opinion, and honestly, I only have a handful of diapers/covers that I consider "rave worthy," so obviously, I'm going to end up repeating myself.

[nym]

Originally posted by pinkmommy

I think if you are part of clique, you might not see it in the same light as someone who is new. I have definitely felt (at times) that my posts are not as "popular" -- I know it sounds juvenile and to an extent it is, but I'm just trying to explain how I feel.

ITA: I have been lurking here for months. I rarely post, mostly because I am extrememly shy online. But, when I do post, I feel very funny; anxious, embarassed, paranoid.
I feel like the geeky kid on the outside watching in. I can see all the popular people and I listen to what they say, and go look at what they are buying and stalking, but I can't afford to play the game. And therefore I don't have much to share.

Anytime I do post though, I have always gotten a warm response. These are just my feelings, and they extend to the whole site.

I like reading about the stalkings, I like to go and look before everything is gone. I don't like that some posters will mention that they are stalking something, and then not tell if someone asks in a thread. I think that that is kinda rude. Don't mention a secret if you don't want anyone to know.

JMHO

[oceanbaby]

there's been a few threads where they're talking about an immenent stocking but won't say which store they're stalking. Someone will ask outright but no one will share which store is being stalked for fear of more competition. THAT'S what really bugs me now. Not that I stalk but still, I hate this "I know something you don't know" stuff.

I have to say that that's the only thing I've found on here that bugged me. I don't buy a lot of the hyena stuff anyway, but those kind of threads do have an exclusionary quality about them.

[kblue]

Being fairly new to this forum (but not cd'ing - I've been doing that for over 2 years) I really like it! I love the fast pace, I love the links to WAHM sites, I love hearing about and seeing pics of everyone's "catches". I don't find it hard to get basic diaper info at all! It's all over. I've never seen a post asking about diaper care get ignored. I've asked many questions myself and received very helpful replies.

Part of cding is searching for "the perfect system" and if you've found it, great - then don't open the threads talking about new products if you feel it's too much of a temptation. I personally love those threads and love hearing about new WAHMs that I can support!

As for commercialism - it's not like people are telling you to go buy from some super store so that they can put the small businesses out of commission. Actually, the opposite is true. We are supporting WAHMs - women who have made the commendable decision to STAY HOME WITH THEIR CHILDREN and support their families by making quality products that we all benefit from!


I think it would be incredibly boring to come here and see 20 threads about washing diapers.