Yay! I got a job. Eek! Pumping at a new workplace.

[ProtoLawyer]

I lost my job when I was 8 months pregnant.

I had a very good second interview this week, and have been told (by the hiring partner) to expect an offer letter Monday at the latest (I turn 35 Monday. Happy birthday to me!).

Assuming all is well with the offer (and they said my previous salary was "in the ballpark," and this company has way better benefits, a 10-minute commute that I can do on one bus if I really want to, and possibly better hours, so I don't think I'll be turning it down), I'll be starting soon, when my son's 11 or 12 weeks.

Thankfully, I don't have supply issues and respond really well to the pump and can get several ounces out in 10 minutes. My son will reluctantly take a bottle from his father (who will be SAHDing for a bit--he's running for office and if he wins, we'll do daycare) if I'm not around.

But: How on earth do I approach pumping with a new employer? If I was returning to my old employer, I'd be given my assignments and would be left to my own devices, so I could schedule pumping in when necessary. At this new place, I will have an office (though I can't say for certain if the offices are fully private, or if they have a windowed door or what), but I suspect the first week(s), I'll be more scheduled with training, etc. I know the health care law requires employers to allow employees to pump, but I don't want to start off on the "well the LAW says" foot on the first day.

Is there a good way to approach this? I can't base whether I accept this job on whether it'll be pump-friendly (as my mortgage doesn't care about that), but what can I do in advance to negotiate this? (My new boss is male, BTW, and I have no idea if he has kids. Small firm, so there's no HR.)

[One_Girl]

If you need the job and you are worried about being turned away for anything related to children you might consider pumping in the car under a blanket until you feel out the situation. I usually had good luck with just being up front about my need to pump in interviews, but my jobs haven't been that great. I only had one job that had a negative feel towards families and even they grudgingly gave me 15 minutes twice during my shifts to pump in the car even though other people didn't get that kind of break. I got an adaptor for my care for $5 at radio shack but they are sometimes a lot more depending on what size you need for the pump.

[texmati]

To be honest, I feel like most people are more than accommodating. Pump breaks really only take 10 -15 minutes, if you are efficient and set everything up before hand. 15 minutes is about as long as it takes for a smoke break, or chat with a coworker.

If you don't feel comfortable talking about pumping to all your coworkers, just mention that you need a quick break, and you'll meet them at X or be back in 15 minutes. The only person you need to tell is your boss.

My boss is pretty conservative (doesn't even say the word pregnant). I sent an email that didn't even have the word breast in it. If you haven't seen the office; I'd make a plan for the first few days (perhaps pump in a car etc), or battery pack and bathroom/closet coworkers office and figure out a more permanent place while you are there.

TBH, I feel that some pink collar fields are much much worse about allowing mom's to pump-- childcare, nursing, teaching all have schedule issues that make it difficult to pump.

[ProtoLawyer]

Originally Posted by One_Girl

If you need the job and you are worried about being turned away for anything related to children you might consider pumping in the car under a blanket until you feel out the situation. I usually had good luck with just being up front about my need to pump in interviews, but my jobs haven't been that great. I only had one job that had a negative feel towards families and even they grudgingly gave me 15 minutes twice during my shifts to pump in the car even though other people didn't get that kind of break. I got an adaptor for my care for $5 at radio shack but they are sometimes a lot more depending on what size you need for the pump.

I'm not worried about being turned away, just about getting the break. I'm an attorney and normally, I'd just go into my office, close the door, and do my projects and pump when I needed to (I can multi-task while pumping, to an extent, too; reading, at the very least). But if I'm assigned to train all day or something (and, in WI, the employer's under no obligation to provide breaks) I'm wondering about asking for some privacy and explaining why to someone who may not get it. I think this is more of an assertiveness question for me than anything else. (I'm good at negotiating on behalf of clients--I'm terrible about negotiating on behalf of myself.)

I do have a car adapter for my pump, but I'll be parking a ways away from my office (gotta love city parking garages).

[ProtoLawyer]

Originally Posted by texmati

TBH, I feel that some pink collar fields are much much worse about allowing mom's to pump-- childcare, nursing, teaching all have schedule issues that make it difficult to pump.

This is very true--I used to teach high school and my schedule was at the mercy of whatever they assigned. Three minutes between classes meant even bathroom breaks had to wait for hours.

As I said above, I think this is an assertiveness issue for me more than anything else.

[texmati]

Originally Posted by ProtoLawyer

This is very true--I used to teach high school and my schedule was at the mercy of whatever they assigned. Three minutes between classes meant even bathroom breaks had to wait for hours.

As I said above, I think this is an assertiveness issue for me more than anything else.

Sorry if my reply was flippent! I was doing two thing at once. Like I mentioned, I"m pretty conservative, and it was difficult for me to ask about pumping. I actually never had the conversation in person with my boss. Since I had worked there before, I already had a room picked out, and I just mentioned that in my email.

I would def wait until you accept the offer. I'd send an email a week or so before starting, to your boss only, asking if he knows a sutible location- basically a room with plug (if you don't have a battery pack), and a table and chair, and reassure him that it won't interfere with your work.

As for scheduling, you have a bit of leeway between need to pump, and *leaking!*. For me, I'd try to have a 2 hour window that I knew that I'd have to pump. It was easy for me to schedule around that.

Finally Congratulations!!!!! on the baby and the job.

[One_Girl]

The job I got where I didn't tell them in the interview that I would need to pump on my breaks I told the supervisor I had a 6 month old and I needed time to pump and she gave it to me. I didn't have to give an explanation, but I believe that La Leche League has information pamphlets you can give employers about the benefits of nursing and allowing breaks for mothers to pump.

I also live in a state that doesn't require breaks, but I have only done one job where we haven't had breaks and even then I was able to get them for pumping. Meetings tend to have more breaks than typical work days, especially those initial training meetings. When I was in classes at the university I would go into the bathroom and hand express for a few minutes if I didn't have a place to pump and couldn't return to my car during the break. It took me a lot of practice to master so I recommend practicing at home if you get a meeting somewhere where pumping may not be doable because it is messy right at first. I have yet to be in a meeting where we weren't allowed to walk out to use the bathroom anytime we needed to and I used that to my advantage. People just assume you are having your period when you bring your purse out wth you and that you aren't feeling well if you stay in the bathroom for several minutes but they don't bring it up.

[~pi]

Congrats on the job!!!

I haven't done this with pumping, but I've had to request accommodations for a medical issue. I have always found that if I am matter-of-fact about it and treat it like not a big deal, they respond in kind. I would say something like, "By the way, I'll have a new baby when I start, and so I'll need to pump a few times a day. I imagine that there will be one or more days of training sessions when I start. Do you have any advice about how I can make arrangements to pump in a way that minimizes disruptions to the training schedule?"

[saimeiyu]

Pi's response is pretty good.

Honestly, I'd be very matter of fact about it. It's not a question about IF you can pump. It's a question of Where it should happen, and possibly when to schedule meetings around it. You approach the conversation with a question of how it should be handled so that everyone is comfortable, (I.e. will your office have windows, is there some other private room they'd prefer for it to happen in?), not with a diffident, "um, hey, I would really like to do this, is that OK?"

[Aramat36]

Congrats on the new job and Happy Birthday! I feel ya, I've returned to work and I'm pumping 2-3 times a day in my office. My employer is fine with it. I close my door and cover up just in case someone does come in, I did also let the office know if the door is closed that's most likely what I'm doing. Just talk to HR, I'm sure they will be fine with it. Let us know!

[justKate]

Originally Posted by ProtoLawyer

But: How on earth do I approach pumping with a new employer? If I was returning to my old employer, I'd be given my assignments and would be left to my own devices, so I could schedule pumping in when necessary. At this new place, I will have an office (though I can't say for certain if the offices are fully private, or if they have a windowed door or what), but I suspect the first week(s), I'll be more scheduled with training, etc. I know the health care law requires employers to allow employees to pump, but I don't want to start off on the "well the LAW says" foot on the first day.

Is there a good way to approach this? I can't base whether I accept this job on whether it'll be pump-friendly (as my mortgage doesn't care about that), but what can I do in advance to negotiate this? (My new boss is male, BTW, and I have no idea if he has kids. Small firm, so there's no HR.)

Yikes, BTDT about 14 months ago. I'm also a lawyer and just showed up on the first day with my pump. Fortunately it's state employment, so they had a lactation room I used for the first week. Then I got an office (with no lock), and I just pumped at lunch time with a sticky note on the door.

I avoid confrontation as much as possible, so since its a small (male-run, right?) firm I would send the boss a casual email after you accept the offer. Something like, "Just wanted to give you a heads-up that I'm pumping for my new baby, so I'll need a short break around X:00...."

If you just state it as a fact, then it's not an issue. And if anyone looks at you sideways, say the words "breasts" and "food" in the same sentence, and everyone will go running.

CONGRATS on the new job, new baby, and birthday!

[pinksprklybarefoot]

Originally Posted by justKate

If you just state it as a fact, then it's not an issue. And if anyone looks at you sideways, say the words "breasts" and "food" in the same sentence, and everyone will go running.

IME, people that didn't nurse or men without (and some with) children just don't want to think about it and will give you all of the time you need - similar to telling your male supervisor that you need the day off to go to the doctor for a "female problem." They start shooing you out the door right then.

I would definitely wait until the offer is done, like the PP said. Sometimes the priorities of new moms get questioned, and that would be annoying to deal with.

Congrats on the job!

[Surfacing]

Congrats Proto!

[cchrissyy]

no more advice, just congratulations!

[lunarlady]

Congrats on the new job! I've found that if I avoid the words breast and pump, it actually goes better. So I usually say "is there a mother's room or other private location I can go to express milk for my baby?". Congrats on the job!

[CorasMama]

Just treat it as one of the multitude of other things a new employee asks about at the beginning of their job, like where the bathrooms are, where you put your coat, what the best/fastest/cheapest lunch places are, and how you can work pumping into your day in a way that's most convenient for the firm. Don't ask, "MAY I pump?" but rather, "WHERE may I pump?"

Will you have any colleagues who you think would be more comfortable with talking about it? Like, you could ask a coworker, "where do new moms go to pump here?" and maybe since they've been there for a while and are comfortable with the boss, they could get it figured out for you.

Also, congrats on the new job! I'm glad things are going so well!

[Caneel]

Originally Posted by pinksprklybarefoot

IME, people that didn't nurse or men without (and some with) children just don't want to think about it and will give you all of the time you need - similar to telling your male supervisor that you need the day off to go to the doctor for a "female problem." They start shooing you out the door right then.

Ha! so true.

My boss at the time was a total, female-hating,a-hole. (he cursed at me when I told him I was taking 12 weeks off pp) The thought of "girl" things of any sort sent him into some sort of mental shut down, leaving me free to do what I needed.

Like others mentioned, be efficient and prepared. Make sure your supplies are clean and ready to go. Take something to read or listen to so you can relax.

Don't ask permission, just do it. Consider your child as your client. When you start and a schedule for training is presented, just say right then "at 10 am I will need a 15 minute break to pump" Chances are, who ever is running the training will be welcome for the break anyway.

[ProtoLawyer]

Yay! First day in the new job and they gave me a bunch of paperwork to fill out, a Blackberry to set up (which took for-bloody-ever because the server wasn't working out), and a box of stuff to review. Nobody cared what I did.

My office has a door (which will have my name on it soon! I never had a nameplate before!) and a view of the Milwaukee skyline, and, between the buildings, Lake Michigan.

I managed to pump 16 ounces today and could (should!) probably have gotten another session in (finding a balance between pumping enough but not for triplets, maintaining supply, preventing engorgement is going to be interesting--it's a learning curve). For now, I'm storing the milk in a cooler in my office but may get brave enough to stick it in the office fridge (I suppose nobody will know if I use a grocery bag). I also discovered that if I'm wearing a sweater, the sweater holds the horns in place so I can do it (mostly) hands-free (I have an older Pump in Style) without a special bra.

Ellison did very well with his dad--ate about 10 ounces, didn't fuss at the bottle, napped regularly. Mellow baby so far (we're lucky). When I got home...he was asleep! He nursed for approximately 11 million years when he woke up, though.

(Is it weird that I occasionally talked to my son's picture? "I'm coming home soon, but I need to finish the Statement of the Case section before I do.")

[texmati]

wow! great update proto!

[somegirl99]

Glad to hear it's going well and congrats on the job!