My 8 yr old dd is a wonderful child--but she is wise beyond her years. Part of that is perhaps because she is a child living in an adult world--she plays violin with an adult orchestra and attends a gifted magnet school and reads on a 9th grade level (according to reading tests). Some of her friends in her after school care are a little older...but she does have friends her age in her class--but they are all wise beyond their years, like she is.
My 6 year old ds--not a problem at all.
But back to dd--she is becoming a nightmare with this separation. She acts like I did when I was in HIGH SCHOOL as far as her attitude and snarky behavior--angry at me all the time, telling me that daddy is more fun, telling me that a "third grader should not be subjected to such a horrible life" (yes, she uses the word subjected, LOL) and then when I ask her--why she says that--OR I try to tell her things will be OK--she retorts, "if you weren't so mean, we'd still have our family! I know why daddy left us! Because of you!"
Of course, she says this when I tell her it's bedtime, or when I tell her we're out of milk, or when I tell her she can't have something she sees in the store (because of course, she is still 8). It's not like I am doing something out of the norm in her life.
So--moms--how on earth did you deal with statements like that??? With ANY age child? I am at a loss. It really puts a knife in my heart to hear those things. Her dad and I are still raw and I tried to tell him about it, in case he had been filling her ears with things--but he denies it.
I am at a loss. Talking normally: honey, I know you are mad, etc., just leads her to reason it to death--and it's wearing me out.
I need a creative solution to really kill this kind of talk in its tracks.
Sometimes I just want to curl in a ball and fall over--I feel like yelling: Your DAD did this! Not me! But then I remember that I am actually supposed to be the adult in this thing and try to diffuse her...
I need help.
My 6 year old ds--not a problem at all.
But back to dd--she is becoming a nightmare with this separation. She acts like I did when I was in HIGH SCHOOL as far as her attitude and snarky behavior--angry at me all the time, telling me that daddy is more fun, telling me that a "third grader should not be subjected to such a horrible life" (yes, she uses the word subjected, LOL) and then when I ask her--why she says that--OR I try to tell her things will be OK--she retorts, "if you weren't so mean, we'd still have our family! I know why daddy left us! Because of you!"
Of course, she says this when I tell her it's bedtime, or when I tell her we're out of milk, or when I tell her she can't have something she sees in the store (because of course, she is still 8). It's not like I am doing something out of the norm in her life.
So--moms--how on earth did you deal with statements like that??? With ANY age child? I am at a loss. It really puts a knife in my heart to hear those things. Her dad and I are still raw and I tried to tell him about it, in case he had been filling her ears with things--but he denies it.
I am at a loss. Talking normally: honey, I know you are mad, etc., just leads her to reason it to death--and it's wearing me out.
I need a creative solution to really kill this kind of talk in its tracks.
Sometimes I just want to curl in a ball and fall over--I feel like yelling: Your DAD did this! Not me! But then I remember that I am actually supposed to be the adult in this thing and try to diffuse her...
I need help.
Being a mom is hard work!
mama that you are so raw that you feel the attack so deeply.
