20 m.o. kicks/hits/crawls on/stands on/pregnant belly and laughs when i tell him to knock it off.

[babybirkel]

I get that my DS is a very physical kid, and he shows affection as well as anger and silliness through his body. I get that.

how do i get him to stop mauling me all day long? he kicks me in the pregnant belly/boobs, hits, pinches/crawls all over me...he's usually not angry when he does it, he's just playing and getting carried away.

i've tried just putting him down and saying "kicking hurts mama and it's not very nice. you can be on my lap again when you don't kick me." and getting up for a little bit...but it starts all over again the moment i sit down.

and when i say "ouch, that hurts!" he laughs.

i don't know what it is about being pregnant, but when he crawls all over my belly and kicks me and stuff it really bothers me...i want to scream at him "GET OFF OF ME!!!"

when he is angry and hits or pinches, i say "no, NO HITTING" firmly and put him in his crib for like 30 seconds to a minute. i guess that's a time-out. i understand that some here aren't comfortable with that. that seems to help though...he understands the consequences and seems to act gentler afterwards.

so, am i doing the right things? what else can do?

[earth-mama]

My DD who is also 20 months, seems to be going through a similar phase. She will hit, pinch and recently has started kicking. My primary technique is to tell her it hurts, if it hurts, and to remind her to use gentle touches--which I demonstrate. I use this same technique for her interaction with our two dogs and cat, so she is aware of and used to the idea of "gentle touches."

I work part time, but have days where I am gone all day, the long days seem to trigger more hitting, etc. so I suspect that it is her way of expressing her feelings. This may also be true for your little one. Most often, I find that if I redirect DD with toys, games, puzzles, or other activities that she responds very well and will stop hitting, pinching or sometimes she even bite (gently--it is a game to her and she thinks it is funny).

[lifeguard]

I try to avoid saying no hitting/pinching/etc. & instead phrase it positively. Our go to phrase is "GENTLE" & after much repetition ds now will usually switch from rough to gentle with this reminder.

Consistency with the consequence will help too. Whether you choose the time out or being put down & not allowed back up for a little bit you need to do it every. single. time. he's too rough. We put ds down. He'll throw a fit for a minute & then move on. But he rarely is rough with us anymore.

[swd12422]

At that age, we were teaching GENTLE touching. As soon as a hit, pinch, kick, whatever happened, I'd grab his hand and say, "GENTLE. Please be gentle." And use his hand to "pet" my arm (or his own arm so he could feel how nice it was). If he kicked, I'd also remind him to use his hands GENTLY. It was a game for him, but it ended up working b/c he was still getting the attention he wanted, and after a few months (sorry, yeah, it took that long) he'd lift his arm to swing at me and then put it down and pet my arm so nicely. And he'd get LOTS of love and attention for that. It might help to reinforce with other things too. Like when you're changing his diaper or getting him dressed, do things slowly and deliberately, and say, "Look how gentle I am!" Have him practice being gentle with anything and everything: the animals, the trees outside, a ball, a pillow (or maybe give him a special pillow that he can hit instead of being gentle)...

Once he got a little older, we started giving him timeouts. I was exhausted from walking away from him and having him follow me, and having to tell him to stay away from me if he was going to hurt me. It just didn't work. So we put him in the corner (where we could see/hear him) and he'd stay there. I'd tell him he could come out when he was ready to be gentle. Sometimes he still needs the reminder b/c he gets overly excited, but it helps more to have him removed from the situation.

And yeah, you have to be consistent. Every time.