GD when something has to be done NOW - Page 2

[PGTlatte]

Originally Posted by DevaMajka

I think I may have given the wrong impression of the waiting for the bus method. lol. Have you read SOP? It's sort of a hard concept to "get" without reading the book. It's not about waiting until the child feels like doing what you want. You tell them what you want done, then you wait until they do it, with the expectation that they WILL do it, and they WILL do it soon. You watch them with that expectation, and it puts a sort of pressure on them that makes them uncomfortable, in a way. You don't put your attention on something else, but you also don't get upset with dc- kinda like waiting for a bus when you are in a hurry.
When I said that it took some time at first, I meant 5-10 minutes, until he got used to the idea that I DO expect him to do as I say (in certain situations, or when I use a certain tone of voice, etc).

I get the concept - it's exactly what my friend described. Except to her son it was a game. She thought she was doing this great thing by saying what she wanted, setting her expectation, and being willing to wait and watch expectantly until he went along with it...all great in theory until it's tried with a child who thinks it's fun to see how long it can be drawn out.

[dawncayden]

I do a lot of Playful Parenting methods when things have to be done NOW.
If he ran towards a street without stopping, I wouldn't be thinking of GD or playful parenting, I'd yell his name and being screaming STOP! Thankfully he has only done that once and he stopped as soon as he heard me.

When we need pajamas on or need to get somewhere we often have races, we also play 'monsters or dragons', like 'ahhhh the dragons are coming, lets get in our carseat so we can get out of here', or 'ahhh the dragons are coming lets quickly get our pj's on so we can fight them'...it's pretty fun, and their's almost zero struggle.

I also sometimes do choices like 'which way are you going to get into your seat? Are you going to hop in or slither in?'
'Are you going to put your pj pants on first or your top?'

[mamazee]

I've had better success with "waiting for the bus" with older kids than with toddlers. Though it can be very effective with the 8-year-old, my toddler wouldn't get it.

[DevaMajka]

Originally Posted by mamazee

I've had better success with "waiting for the bus" with older kids than with toddlers. Though it can be very effective with the 8-year-old, my toddler wouldn't get it.

Yeah, you're probably right. It worked well for ds1, but I often forget that other toddlers (including ds2!) probably won't respond the same. I *do* think it's a useful read for someone who gets frustrated and angry. It helped me learn to be more calm when dealing with difficult situations. Or, perhaps, that's why it helped with ds1. lol