or Connect
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Baby showers? - Page 2

post #21 of 24
My mom's group had gotten into a nice tradition this year of doing mother blessings for all the second babies being born. We either go out to lunch or lunch at someone's house, do some kind of blessing, like each giving a bead for a birth necklace or a square for a quilt, and anyone who wishes contributes to a group gift--an ergo for a couple of us, a spa day for a mom who has tons of baby gear but could use some relaxing time. Mine is at the end of October.
post #22 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yuba_River View Post


I think if you're talking about close friends/family, it's not rude. Is there someone who you could talk to about it who could take on the role of spreading the word? Always seems easier if it doesn't come from you.
Not really. I'd say my mom, but she's the one I'm having the most issues with at the moment (this pattern has really developed, or at least become noticable to me, only over the past year or two). Plus, split family and all.

I'll probably send out an update email with the pictures from DD1's birthday and so forth, and mention it there. And then laugh about it if I end getting a ton of clothing from my mom.
post #23 of 24
I am having our fourth baby, and yes, I am having a "sprinkle". I don't need clothes or really anything, my last baby was a boy and so is this, and they are both born in the fall!

My mom and sister have given me a shower for all my babies. All I get are clothes, which is nice, and was necessary for the first girl and first boy, but even for my first baby I did not get anything like baby gear or anything I could not afford myself. I was just married and only 19 and I guess some of my extended family and in-laws felt we should struggle and suffer a bit. There is definitely some twinges of bitterness in this thread.
But I have to say people can be incredibly mean about when others have children, especially if it is more than the number THEY think anyone should have! If they are going to be negative, I hope those people just don't come! We are so excited about this baby, we conceived right when I asked the Lord for him, and we even want more children!

About telling guests no clothes. I asked my mom if she would tell people when they called asking what to bring for a gift that I don't need any more clothes, and I do not use paper diapers. She said well what are we having a shower for? I told her everything else for heaven's sake! Wipes. Soap. ETc. I made a registry for cloth diapers, I need some new things to go with what I already have, but I erased it because nobody understands four children, much less cloth diapers and I was afraid! So I will just be happy if people just come to celebrate!
post #24 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by earthknitter View Post
I was just married and only 19 and I guess some of my extended family and in-laws felt we should struggle and suffer a bit. There is definitely some twinges of bitterness in this thread.
I'm sorry. I see this type of thinking a lot, and it drives me absolutely up the wall. The people who get everything bought for them, free babysitting from the grandparents, and so forth, are those who are married, financially stable, and of an appropriate age. The ones who are broke, young, single, etc. and most in need of support are seen as needing to suffer and pay for their mistake, not get rewarded. Even if it comes at the physical/emotional expense of the baby. (Not that I think the parents themselves should suffer or have anything short of the best welcome into parenthood possible, but this kind of thinking just seems SO BACKWARDS to me, especially since these same people are often anti-abortion.)

I can't even say this bothers me from a personal standpoint, as I was somewhere in the middle - unmarried, but not unusually young, and, at the time, reasonably financially stable. And, I guess, I got an in-between sort of shower/presents.

Quote:
About telling guests no clothes. I asked my mom if she would tell people when they called asking what to bring for a gift that I don't need any more clothes, and I do not use paper diapers. She said well what are we having a shower for? I told her everything else for heaven's sake! Wipes. Soap. ETc. I made a registry for cloth diapers, I need some new things to go with what I already have, but I erased it because nobody understands four children, much less cloth diapers and I was afraid! So I will just be happy if people just come to celebrate!
I understand! I suspect a large part of my angst here is that people can't just come to celebrate. If we still lived in our old town, we'd have a celebration party, and people would bring a potluck dish or diaper rash cream or something, and coo over the baby, and I'd be perfectly happy with that. But they're not going to come all the way out here, and we don't really know anyone here yet. I'm sure my mom will come as soon as she's able, but my dad and brother may or may not come here before we go visit them around the holidays, and my grandparents are too old and sick to travel. We're on good terms with DH's mom, but she hasn't seen us since DS was born 7 years ago, so I doubt she'll make an appearance.

Greetings on Facebook just aren't quite the same, you know?

I hope people come to yours, and maybe even give you stuff you can use! Even if they don't understand cloth diapers, hopefully they'll understand wipes!
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: November 2010