Temperament and choice of Pre-K

[babygrace]

Question for parents of boisterous, active kids- what kind of pre-k did you find the best fit for your spirited, does-not-want-to-follow-directions child? I am considering Montessori, but am not sure if this would the right fit for my child. What should I be looking for to ensure that I am making the correct choice of pre-k? Thanks so much in advance!

[ollyoxenfree]

My kids spent many years in a few different Montessori schools. When we moved cities, I spent time checking out different schools. I know Montessori educators and I read a few boards. What I've learned from all this is that there are almost as many different kinds of Montessori schools as there are schools in general. I saw Montessori programs in flexible, easy-going schools, rigid schools, weird schools, and wonderful schools. It's crucial that you carefully investigate schools to determine which are a good fit.

A traditional Montessori school that applies the principles conscientiously may be a very good fit for an active child. In the 3 to 6 y.o. program, there is no desk work, the children are encouraged to be self-directed and independent, and they can move from one type of work to another according to interest and ability. Following directions may be a problem if a child has an extreme oppositional personality, but such a child would likely have difficulty in any school environment. A patient directress will be able to engage most children in the various learning areas and encourage them to develop self-discipline.

When you visit, ask how they deal with high energy, resistance to following directions, impulsive behaviour and any other problems you are anticipating. Look for positive interventions and re-direction from the directress when she's working with the students. It's often quite obvious when you find a school that fits your child.

[One_Girl]

I found that the preschools where the teachers were warm and caring but consistent with boundaries and expectations worked best for my dd. She attended play-based centers, but from what I understand Montessori may work also because they have very set limits on what the kids can and can't do while also allowing kids to choose from a limited range of materials that have a real life purpose. I don't think the free spirit/imagination part is as supported in Montessori as it is in playbased as they tend to focus on academics.

[LuckyMommaToo]

I agree that it comes down to the teacher more than anything. We also did play-based, which was amazing for my high-energy boy. They focused intensively on social skills and had a high teacher-kid ratio. It was fantastic. Visit as many schools as you can so you get a feel for what's out there.
-e

[ollyoxenfree]

Originally Posted by One_Girl

I don't think the free spirit/imagination part is as supported in Montessori as it is in playbased as they tend to focus on academics.

OP, you didn't ask about Montessori and imaginary play, so I'm not going to respond to this here. It's a topic that comes up fairly frequently. There are a lot of misconceptions out there. If you are interested in learning more about Montessori, you will find a lot of helpful older threads with posts from informed, experienced people in the Montessori forum. They will be able to provide sound insight if you have any questions you'd like to post there.

[madskye]

I vote for just getting out there and visiting different centers. You can read websites and what people have to say about philosophies but there's no way to know how it "plays out" til you are there, really. I always thought playbased would be the way to go for us, but in the end, the place I felt most comfortable with had a very different philosophy. But I felt they had the most attentive staff, the best schedule, and I liked their facility and it's location. My advice is to keep an open mind and get out there and check things out!

[One_Girl]

Originally Posted by ollyoxenfree

OP, you didn't ask about Montessori and imaginary play, so I'm not going to respond to this here. It's a topic that comes up fairly frequently. There are a lot of misconceptions out there. If you are interested in learning more about Montessori, you will find a lot of helpful older threads with posts from informed, experienced people in the Montessori forum. They will be able to provide sound insight if you have any questions you'd like to post there.

I am not sure why my text is quoted here since what I said wasn't addressed at all. Since you quoted me I will assume that you meant to imply that I don't know what I am talking about. I actually am informed about the Montessori schools in our area that are considered good, I have worked as a nanny for two boys at two different "good" Montessori schools and seen how that has worked out in person from both the children and their parents, observed in both of these schools and discussed the views on imagination with the directors at the school, and talked about this with a friend who is in Montessori education training for this age group. The trained people and one of the mothers all advocate allowing only real life play and reality to be part of the kids lives.

It may be that because this method is so old that there are many different interpretations and the Montessori in your area is different. The OP asked about schools that support free spirited kids and in my experience the free spirited kids tend to have imagination the OP is considering. It is something to really check into and ask about if you want to make sure your child will be supported in their creative side because from what I gather the Montessori schools that we have here aren't necessarily what the people who like Montessori education have for their kids.

[ollyoxenfree]

Originally Posted by One_Girl

I am not sure why my text is quoted here since what I said wasn't addressed at all. Since you quoted me I will assume that you meant to imply that I don't know what I am talking about. I actually am informed about the Montessori schools in our area that are considered good, I have worked as a nanny for two boys at two different "good" Montessori schools and seen how that has worked out in person from both the children and their parents, observed in both of these schools and discussed the views on imagination with the directors at the school, and talked about this with a friend who is in Montessori education training for this age group. The trained people and one of the mothers all advocate allowing only real life play and reality to be part of the kids lives.

It may be that because this method is so old that there are many different interpretations and the Montessori in your area is different. The OP asked about schools that support free spirited kids and in my experience the free spirited kids tend to have imagination the OP is considering. It is something to really check into and ask about if you want to make sure your child will be supported in their creative side because from what I gather the Montessori schools that we have here aren't necessarily what the people who like Montessori education have for their kids.

I quoted that statement because it was bald statement about Montessori. The OP didn't mention imaginary play or creativity in her post. I didn't think it was appropriate to enter into a long discussion about something that she wasn't necessarily concerned about. I wanted to provide some direction to her though, so I suggested the Montessori forum. I don't understand how that was offensive? I said nothing at all about you or your knowledge. Given the length of your response, it's obviously an issue of some import and deserves some discussion - in the appropriate forum.