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When, Who, How are you telling? - Page 2

post #21 of 42
This is my first pregnancy and I just found out today! I went to pee just after rolling out of bed pretty much naked and used an IC. When I saw two lines, I just started to shake, and took an FRER right away. Positive. I told my hubby who was having breakfast in the kitchen and surprisingly, since it's taken almost a year for us to get pregnant, he was nonchalant and just kind of smug about it.

I texted my two best friends back home right away, told one of my friends here and my boss. I really want to wait to tell our parents but unfortunately I think it's going to be a little hard for us to wait.

My MIL is an avid knitter, so I'm planning on buying a giant ball of some hideous "BABY" yarn from Walmart and chucking it at her, saying "I think you're going to need this pretty soon".

I still can't believe this is happening..
post #22 of 42
I've told most of my good friends because I need the emotional support; dh is out of town on a work trip and I'm dealing with a lot of stress. I had to tell dh over the phone. He's staying with his dad, so he told his dad and some of his friends, but we aren't telling my family until Thanksgiving, when I'll be 12 weeks. Last time I was pregnant, when I miscarried, breaking that news to my family was the worst part of the whole ordeal and I do NOT want to go through that again.
post #23 of 42
This time, I showed dh the test and asked how many lines he saw.
Kids all took turns adding their vote. lol

I wouldnt mind NOT telling anyone ;-)
My moms the only one who wouldve been happy for us-the rest of both of our families think we are rather crazy/stupid/irresponsible/etc.
This will be our 8th baby.
post #24 of 42
This time I taped the positive test to the back of a piece of construction paper and on the front wrote something about this being a coupon for his birthday present (May 2011) for "1 guilt free visit to the urologist in June of 2011"

He plans to get the big V after our last baby, which this will be.
post #25 of 42
Wow some of you ladies are creative

We just...tell people lol I suppose I did something somewhat creative in that our 5 year old told my mom and sister that she already knew what she was getting for her 6th birthday (the sibling she's been asking for is due around her birthday). It took them a minute to figure it out but everyone is happy.

Everyone on my Facebook knows and everything. In the sad case of a loss, I am not the type to grieve alone in silence so everyone would have known anyway.

My husband, well I took a test before he left for work that day and it was barely visible, it almost looked like an evap line. So I got a 3 pack of FRER tests and they were all glaringly positive so I picture-messaged them on his phone.

His response was he had to get something out of the car... (as in, drive away ) No but he was really happy, we're just funny like that :P
post #26 of 42
Sunday I had a BFP. I took a test Friday, BFN, Saturday, I think it was negative. Sunday we drove to pick up two piglets. On the way I felt nauseous, my water tasted like old ice, LOL. I came home and while dh and the kids were putting the pigs away I took a test. It was positive right away. I ran out of my room and told some of my kids in the house. Then dh came in and I showed him the test. I hinted at it on facebook, told my mom Wednesday. It is so funny though b/c dh said every month, you are not pregnant, then this month he said I was right away and I thought I wasn't after Friday's negative. He was right all along. I told my friends as well.
post #27 of 42
I told my sister, but other than that we are waiting a bit to make sure that this one sticks.
post #28 of 42
@Smokering: Yeah, I was yammering to DH about ovulation and jumping on him systematically, then talking to him about symptoms 8 days later before the test was positive. I'm a planner. I cannot imagine getting to the point of dressing my daughter in a cute onesie to spill the beans!

Also, here's another story. Went to a potluck Sunday. A friend walked over to me and DH (in a group of people) and said to me, "Are you pregnant? Because you keep touching your stomach!" I was like, "Um. Er. I was just, um, laughing about something and grabbing my belly?" Later she asked again (this time not in front of people) and I had to just come out and tell her. I can't lie to someone's face. So she knows.

Really?! So I guess I am telling people, just with nonverbal cues...
post #29 of 42
Thread Starter 
Bax, that's hilarious! I'm just waiting for something like that to happen to me. Of course, if I'm touching my tummy, it's probably because I feel so lousy right now, Bleh.

I am going to spend the night at our Church's ladies' retreat. Yup. My DH says, "If you throw up there, it's ALL over." Personally, I think it's going to be me looking green and eating little snacks during non meal times that's going to give me away.
post #30 of 42
Also, here's another story. Went to a potluck Sunday. A friend walked over to me and DH (in a group of people) and said to me, "Are you pregnant? Because you keep touching your stomach!" I was like, "Um. Er. I was just, um, laughing about something and grabbing my belly?" Later she asked again (this time not in front of people) and I had to just come out and tell her. I can't lie to someone's face. So she knows.
Goodness, that's rude! WHY do people think it's OK to ask this question? Do they really think we're tiptoeing around going "Oh man, I'd love her to know I'm pregnant but I can' t figure out how to enunciate the words... if only she'd ask me!"???

I've already lied once. A woman I don't know rang up to ask me to do her daughter's wedding cake, and during a TWENTY-FOUR MINUTE conversation randomly blurted out "Are you pregnant?" I was completely thrown and stammered "Er, n-no, where did you hear that?", and she said she was "just wondering". I immediately felt guilty, but really. I wasn't about to tell some annoying stranger before I told my MOTHER.

Speaking of which, I did tell my mother. We went out for the day yesterday, and it seemed kind of awkward not telling her, because it's been on my mind so much. She was very pleased, as I knew she would be, and we had a nice chat about midwives and names and DD and stuff. She's not telling anyone else - she thinks I should tell my sister who lives in London first, because she misses out on hearing a lot of news firsthand and it makes her sad.

Might have to tell our flatmate soon, though. I've been SO tired and dizzy - he's going to notice me creeping around looking like death at some point. Actually, this morning he asked me if I was sick and told me I looked like an old woman - and then hastily said that it was because I had a shawl wrapped around my shoulders.
post #31 of 42
i am so much more excited about telling some of my friends than telling my family, dh's family, work, etc. do you all think that there's a moral obligation to tell one's family first? it's just that pregnancy is so long and i'll have to listen to, ahem, OPINIONS from family alllll that time. i can't face it.
and i don't do anything cute either. i had taken the test while a friend was visiting and so had hidden it in the bathroom but my dh went to shave his beard and i had to run in to show him so he wouldn't just find it and be totally confused. (he read the box to make sure he was reading it right...) so it wasn't very emotional since the friend was sitting right in the other room and i wasn't ready to tell anyone else yet. but THEN, the really weird thing is, later over the weekend she asked me if i was pg and said that someone we visited the night before i took the test had told her that she had a feeling i was pg. how on earth did that person know even before i did? and i don't feel bloated or feel like my pants fit differently but two people at work asked if i was pg. (i completely lied, mentioned baby fat from #1 hanging on...) so i am afraid i'm giving off pg signals.
12 weeks seems like a long time not to tell. i'm thinking 8-10 weeks?
post #32 of 42
I told my sister first. I was freaking out and my husband hadn't gotten home from work yet, so I gave her a call and she talked me down off of my "oh, crap" ledge.

Once he got home, I had this totally serious I-hope-you-don't-completely-freak-out tone--I mean, we both agreed we wanted another, *probably* within the next year, but we had been stressing about figuring out the economics, lack of extended family nearby, two demanding jobs, etc. So anyway, I had this sliver (well, ok--more like a large slice) of anxiety that he was going to run out of the house screaming when I told him. But he didn't, and he texted me the next day to tell me he wanted to make sure I knew he was really happy about the news. It was sweet.

I told my mom the next day, and I've told one friend. But other than that, I'm not planning to say anything until 14ish weeks, which I think will be around the week of Thanksgiving. We'll be back East with my husband's family. I don't intend to tell work or other people until the following week, but there's the small matter of me already looking weirdly huge. I suspect the secret will be out well in advance of 14/15 weeks, no matter whether I choose to say anything or not.

post #33 of 42
I was pregnant in September and lost it early on, so I am holding off on telling my parents for a while. I will probably tell my mom after I see a heartbeat. I live away from my family for school and will have to call her to tell her, I guess. I will tell my dad at Thanksgiving. I wonder if I will be showing by then...it'll only be 10/11 weeks, so my guess is no.
post #34 of 42
Well, I've told quite a few people earlier than I planned... my symptoms made it inevitable.

Flatmate was surprised, eventually remembered to say congratulations, critiqued our timing, said he thought women got morning sickness at the end of pregnancy, and sent me a link today - presumably meant to be comforting - about how women with morning sickness have a lower rate of miscarriage and birth defects. He's not the most socially ept person we've ever met, but hey.

My sister in London responded as predicted, gushy and pleased, then gave me a short lecture about how DD shouldn't be an only child - which seemed a little redundant, given the circumstances.

My two little sisters were informed today while on a trip with me, Mum and DD - I thought I should let them know in a more tactful way than throwing up in the car. They were pleased, though my 15-year-old sister said she'd been wondering if I was because I'd been so tired. A cunning lass, that one - will have to keep an eye on her. Other than asking the due date they didn't actually talk much about it, which surprised me, but that was fine. We were going to visit a friend I haven't seen for years and her mother, so I told them too, because the chances of them spilling the news to any mutual acquaintances is low and it kinda came up.

I still have two sisters to tell (one is kind of unsupportive and distant and will probably respond with a vaguely sarcastic remark, not because she doesn't love me but because she's just weird like that; the other has special needs and is incapable of secret-keeping); Dad, who (astonishingly!) noticed I was looking tired the other day, so Mum thought I should tell him... I was languishing on his couch reading Milestones in Obstetrics and Gynaecology, but still, he's not known for being observant, although a sweetie; my in-laws, who I just plain don't wanna tell because I'm nasty and maladjusted; and a few close friends. The latter will probably have to know soon, because my tiredness and sickness are pretty obvious.

I guess with so many people in the loop it's impossible to expect the world at large to remain oblivious forever, but there are still certain people who I'd rather didn't know until the baby turns 5, so I'm hoping.
post #35 of 42
Thread Starter 
I had a woman ask me at the retreat last weekend, "Are you pregnant?" It was my big mouth asking if taking silver was safe for nursing and pregnant women. I laughed and said, "Oh, I've just been planning on pregnancy for so long." And she said, "Since you were 5, right?" And I just nodded. Whew!

Today I am going on a road trip with my mother, SIL, and a friend. None of them know anything yet--my husband wants it that way. We come back tomorrow night, but still I am wondering what they are going to think of me eating and ravenous all the time and queasy the other. I have already been planting seeds of "You know I get car sick" and "My food allergies have been bothering me lately." But I don't know how three intelligent women are going to avoid seeing that I am "in the family way." We'll see!
post #36 of 42
I haven't told anyone other than my best friend. Since she has five, I knew she would be supportive! Dh and I know that my parents are going to give that long, silent pause no matter when we tell them or how. Dh's parents live out of the country so I'm sure they will their usual "Oh, that's great! We'll see it once a year for two days when we come into town!" Ugh. Essentially, I think everyone is going to be pretty negative about it...of course, other than us. I am getting excited about telling the girls and seeing what their reactions will be. I'm not sure yet when we are going to tell them and I think I'm going to tell them by ordering them "Big Sister" and "Big Sister In Training" shirts...wonder how long it will take my five year old to figure it out? The rest of the family we will probably tell by letting the girls do it...maybe a video or something.
post #37 of 42
I just called hubby and told him ( he was suspicious) I've been cranky and emotional...worse than pms. I have allready told most of the people I want to know on facebook or in person. I was going to wait but I just couldn't hold it in! I know I'm not very creative.
post #38 of 42
I'm not creative. I told DH right away. But it would be hard for him not to know as I obsessively started POASing at 9dpo. When I finally saw a line at 12dpo at 6:00am I woke him up and made him come downstairs and squint at the test. It was a very very very faint line. So I retested several hours later with two tests and it was a bit more obvious then!

We had talked about waiting until Christmas to tell everyone, but my mom came over to sub for my daycare during nap time that day so that I could run out to the lab and get my bloodwork done. I thought she'd figure it out, so I just blurted out why I was going. Turns out that she was clueless. So I could've kept my mouth shut. Other than that I've told my dad and two of my closest friends. Also, my birth board group for my DS. Everyone else is going to wait. I don't want my clients to know until I'm in my second trimester, so that's the big reason we're keeping a tight lid this time around. Otherwise we'd probably just blab to everyone!
post #39 of 42
Originally Posted by beryhappy View Post
"I'm so thankful for a healthy pregnancy!". it will also be my facebook status.
Awesome! Mind if I steal this?

Let's see. We've been trying for a few months, and I'd actually already taken 2 tests this cycle, both negative. On the actual day I was supposed to get my period, I finally decided to take another one, expecting it to be negative, to get my period an hour later. At first, I thought it was negative, but no, it was positive. So I took another one, a First Response. I took a picture on my phone of the 2 postive tests and texted it to DH at work. Then, texted him a minute later to see if he looked at the pic. His response, "So are we in business?"

I told my playdate peeps and posted on my local parenting group message forums, but told all them that it is on the down low. I lost my first pg, before, DS, and the worst part was telling people over and over, having them say, "I'm sorry" over and over. So, we're waiting a bit, although neither of us really feels as nervous. I'd like to tell DS soon. I have a WIC appt Thursday, maybe before then. We'll probably wait to tell our families until after the midwife appt. I plan to give my mom a gift bag with a positive test in it. She'll be thrilled. I'd like to get a "Big Brother" shirt to send a pic of DS wearing to my brother and aunt. DH just wants to tell his family plain, not do anything fancy. Boo to that. I probably will wait to tell FB and the general public until after we've seen a heartbeat.
post #40 of 42

note to self...

So, I surprised DH with lunch at work. I put the test in his pack of plasticware. He was totally shocked! He asked me if I paid someone to give me that test!!! HAHAHAHA! He was so happy!

but note to self and hubby: don't tell your three year old until you are ready to tell the WORLD!!!! He tells everyone he sees. "guess what, I'm gonna have a little sister". Of course it isn't even a boy or girl yet, he just thinks he is having a sister and says that is what he wants!
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