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~*~ October Pagan Families Circle ~*~ - Page 32

post #621 of 652
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamaofthree View Post
it is always hard for me to look at my life and see all the waste after i help people who have so little.
I've been homeless (while pregnant) and I just want to say how wonderful it is that you cooked something yummy and nutritious to share. The world needs more people like you. You ROCK!
post #622 of 652
Mo3 Wasting food is NOT ok. I would be super steamed too. I hope your DH can get a better view of the bigger picture and soon.

NMM Fleas are the worst!! And with your new little dd too. Maybe that's a way to look at it. Tell DH a specific time when he can vacuum and tell him you keep finding fleas on your little one. Hopefully that will get his booty off the couch.

Hmm, solstice card exchange...Do you have an example you send send me by email? If yes PM and I will give you my addy.

Uber food aversions today. Candy (My favs are Reeses and Kit Kats) sounds TOTALLY GROSS!! I used to be a Chik-fil-a junkie. I drove by it today and all I could think was ewwww. I had the window down and smelled it and held my breath until I drove by. DH thinks I am experiencing sympathy pregnancy, but I am highly skeptical of that idea. But, we'll both find out in a couple of weeks.
post #623 of 652
well poor dh called just as i finished my post and got an ear full. lol he hadn't noticed the crockpot either. which i just can't believe the thing is BRIGHT RED! lol anyway he made a KP duty list for the kids (dd and ds#1 have dishes after dinner almost every night) so they can go thru the check list and make sure food is put away and dishes are done etc. we are going to sit down with dd and have a heart to heart with her about what we expect of her (as she is 16). it isn't that i expect her to be a slave, but you know put the freakin toilet paper on the roll thing, clean up your hair from the bathroom sink, throw out your old razors. that sort of stuff. PLUS twice a week she is suppose to read to ds#2 at bedtime. like 20 minutes (he likes HP or percy jackson or boxcar children that sort of stuff) her and ds#1 are suppose to take turns doing it. i read to ds#2 and #3 and dh is usually working on his music or folding the wash or something. so it is a little thing. PLUS it is honestly the only time she spends with him most of the week. but darn if it isn't like pulling teeth and if he DARES to ask a question she gets all pissy at him. and i have talked to her about that a number of times. she is a great kid, she really is. but she seems so... i don't know. i guess she is just sorta acting like a teenager. lol

anyway we went to the homeschools halloween potluck at the park. it was really fun. now we are home and going to watch a movie. i am feeling much calmer and more myself.

NMM: EGADS! fleas are the worst! you really have to stay on it for what seems like forever. can you just leave the vacuum out in the middle of the room for your dh. lol or maybe have his mom call him. lol (sadly i have tattled on my dh to his mom before. mostly just me crabbing about something and she will tell him off. lol she is a great MIL! lol)

h
post #624 of 652
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewMoonMum View Post
Once again I am stressed and crabby...did I mention we came home from the hospital to find our indoor-only cats had fleas?
essential oils kick butt for fleas: tea tree oil, citronella oil, peppermint (caution when pregnant - don't want to inhale too much of this), cedarwood, and lavender.

we once visited the in-laws in the summer. dh and ds were covered in flea bites, even though grandma swore that her cats never went into the bedroom we were using. i sprinkled every. single. essential. oil. throughout the bedroom (and i had fewer than a dozen!), in the bed, in our luggage... we used a lavender spritz as a repellent during the day (i swear you could see the little buggers jump onto you - they were that bad!), a few drops of lavender oil in lotion for night, lavender oil in jojoba oil for an evening bug repellent, lavender oil neat on bug bites.

MO3 - i'd be peeved too. sheesh, your 16 yr old does not have chores the way i had chores, back in the old days (when i had to walk a mile to school, uphill both ways...) when dinosaurs roamed the earth...

Brittee: my boobs change overnight when i'm pregnant. i've known within a day of conception that i'm pregnant. swelling, sensitive, perky (yet not), and so on.

and one more thing on bees... David Attenborough and "The Private Life of Plants" - hard to find, even on Amazon. but stunning capture of insects helping plants do their thing. we used to use it in intro botany lab for the weeks when we talked about plant reproduction.

Aubergine: ahhhh.... hemp seed pesto!
post #625 of 652
Fleas - yikes! If I knew anything that would help, I would jump in for sure, but I have no idea! I hope they go away soon!

The midwives office called yesterday and I go in for blood work (at my request) Wednesday and Friday. I will see my primary midwife (who I love). About the ultrasound, they would certainly do it (I've had them do it before too).

I am getting ready to go to an AGM near the border of the US today (2 hour drive, that's why I am up at 5am). Since I am not on-call yet (won't be long) I can actually go! It should be an interesting day - a very different perspective.

I still have to finish the Samhain ritual and make the order of service for tomorrow's Circle at the UU congregation. I will be exhausted today! Looking forward to real relaxing time!

The leg pain seems to be mostly resolved - I think it is actually digestion issues. I was eating no wheat, sugar, or dairy but I was having a one month, just eat anything you want...and it came back with hard. I am starting to eliminate one at a time so I can see what is the culprit, starting with dairy.

Otherwise, I just had this creepy dream of a tornado and it took me a while to remember that we had a cold room in the basement that is all cement (we don't here but in the dream I was in the house I grew up in as a teen). Just read an online dream dictionary entry saying that dreaming of a tornado is a warning about change, symbol of fear, can mean you feel like you are being carried away. Interesting. My dreams prior to DD I was good at remembering because of training my brain. I have always had vivid dreams in pregnancy. This should be interesting! Maybe time to bring my dream diary out of retirement.

I have been thinking for a few weeks that I really want to work on my intuitive skills. I get moments where I know something will happen or that aha or just get words but don't know the context yet. Not too sure on how to do that but I am looking forward to it. I know someone that does it in the baby field specifically.

For the last few days, I have been doing happy visualizations - seeing the baby implant in the uterus (away from the cervix) and the other scene I keep seeing is me sitting my our bed staring at a healthy baby with the umbilical cord still attached (looks like the placenta is still in) and I see feet walking over to our dresser and then back to the bed (I assume midwife) and me feeling nothing but love and being lost in the moment. I think these visualizations are sustaining me at the moment because I do have a lot of fear but I am trying to work through it. Lots of meditative moments throughout the day!

MO3 - sorry to hear about the wasted food! I am working on reframing chores in my own mind because it was always used as punishment in our house and I want to enjoy taking care of our home. Hopefully your DD gets on board! I know from working with 200 teens (at once) chores are not an easy discussion!

I might not get back on here right away but I wanted to wish everyone a Blessed Samhain!
post #626 of 652
Fleas: #1 thing I learned when I was infested with them is they get used to whatever treatment and you have to keep switching it up.
#2 is you have to empty the vacuum (OUT of the house!) every time you vacuum, or they reproduce in there. IN the vacuum.
post #627 of 652
maia: that is true about the fleas. i think there is something you can put in the vacuum to help with that. before we moved from maine we found fleas and ticks on the cat (she is an in door out door cat) and finally after much work we broke down and got her a flea and tick collar. thankfully we only used it for about a month.

h
post #628 of 652
Fleas! Ack! Something to add to my "bed bug phobia" I suppose. Good luck!

Cari-

General cruddiness... what is going on today? I had a major meltdown this morning after something DH said. I cried for an hour or two and am still a mess. Swollen eyes, stomach upset, headache, the works. It was something dumb, and dh had actually meant it as a suggestion that might make my life easier but dang... it was just about the worst thing to say, and kind of the worste moment. It just shook me to my core and crumble bumble mushy melt. (basically my MIL is sending us on vacation... but to a shut down summer town So nothing is open and we'll sort of jsut share a studio apartment in her time share for a week... and we don't have anyone to watch the chickens, or take care or the cat, or... well, there are some problems and we have to leave next week. It's really bad timing though a very sweet gift. Anyway, I'm still dealing with the thrush/bacterial infections and DH said he thought maybe he could take the three kids and I could stay here at the house for the week. His idea was I'd get a "break" from breastfeeding and could relax without the kids. I told him ds is waaaaaay too young to wean, he kept pushing, it was bad. But he meant well and totally didn't expect me to collapse. Though how he would have thought I'd be happy to send my three young kiddos off for a week... not to mention I completely panic when I'm alone over night... argh.)

Anyway, it's a tough day. We're not getting stuff done the way we should. Argh.
post #629 of 652
cari, HUZZAH!!!!

mo3, hugs, hon. i'm seriously thinking you and i need to drop the dhs and kiddos at a park and you and i go sit and have a coffee treat. we've gotta come up to ikea before the end of november. i'll pm you when we know we're coming.

dok~hugs, too. hope you're doing ok.

singin'~ i thought of you yesterday... there's a floral remedy i think you might love... it's specifically for women, esp about sexual/body things, but read beyond their description, and just read the list of flowers...... it just seemed like "you"....

bluets-- i found the attenborough on google vids! i could listen to him talk all day long......


thanks for the buzzzzzzy words, m'dears! <bee icon here!>
as i left the pool yesterday, having scooped out three bees while swiming, then walking thru the shrubbery that is swarming with them and not flinching at all, it struck me as interesting... i used to be so scared of them, and esp after the stings, i was terrified.... but something switched, and now i'm just.not.at.all.... my avalon oracle lists bees as indicative of keep working hard and you will get what you desire (apt, as i'm feeling house-burn-out again!) but there's something else going on. i like the idea of the homeopathic. i still have some from after the sting... maybe i'll try taking it.

ok, so, do i have to go read 5th sacred thing, or can someone just say something about it?

i need toilet help, my cunning home-wise ladies-- ours get disgusting within a day of cleaning them! i cant find a "problem" plumbing wise, so i guess it's just gross.... i read denture cleaners would help, but ick.... not sure what all's in them, and do i want to use that? i thought about those "chem-free" things that you put in the tank-- they sell them on gaiam. half the reviews say: "wow! amazing! havent cleaned my toilet in six years!" and half say: "ew. does nothing." any discoveries you have to share???

i need more time for all i need to get done! gak! we went apple picking yesterday-- my first time picking grannie smiths, and i have to say, i think it's my new favorite picking experience. there was something *extra magical* about them, and i was of course, thinking of all my fellow avalon-lovers..... anyhow, we picked only 12 lbs, and some (ok, most!) will get eaten, and fast, but i do want to prep filling for my favorite apple cranberry currant pies, so i can pull them out all winter... but i also got pounds and pounds of green beans and zukes and such that i need to prep and freeze, but the pumpkin patch has been taking up a lot of our time, too, plus i'm still trying to get "real" curtains on the windows and i have this adorable winter craft i want to do-- basically stuffed animal trees! how adorable is that? with ribbons and beads, of course!

hope everyone has a wonderfully bright and bubbly day!
xoxoxox
post #630 of 652
Clay- It sounds like it could be a nice gift but I understand how it must feel, the logistics of getting away and being away from the kids, not to mention possible weaning, would make the gift feel less like a gift. I hate being told that I need a break, even when I really need a break. It is this weird head game that I go through when I am so overwhelmed the thought of getting away is great but the reality of getting away causes stress. Sorry you are feeling down! Could you do just one overnight? *hugs*

Healing- I am wondering if I might have an ulcer? I have had a general burning sensation in my lower stomach, it doesn't hurt, and it feels like when I had an ulcer in college. I am looking for some natural healing before I head to the dr.

We took the kids to an indoor trick or treating event and they had a ball!

Happy Samhain all! May the new year bless you in abundance!
post #631 of 652
Happy Halloween! Blessed Samhain!

Super duper busy today running errands and trying to avoid the side of town near the stadium - university football game today and it totally clogs up the streets.

Clay - hugs! I too hate being told that I need a break. I get overwhelmed traveling. I do like to spend time alone but would not at all have been ready to be overnight-separated from a youngling like yours is now. I probably would have had the same reaction. On the other hand, that would have demonstrated that we needed a break.

(Dh just realized that we really only took 4 whole days off from work since January. Yowsa. So we stayed home yesterday - not that he didn't work, of course - he just didn't do as much work.)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aeress View Post
Healing- I am wondering if I might have an ulcer? I have had a general burning sensation in my lower stomach, it doesn't hurt, and it feels like when I had an ulcer in college. I am looking for some natural healing before I head to the dr.
Marshmallow root, licorice root, slippery elm, aloe vera - pretty much anything mucilaginous would be good and soothing for ulcers. You probably also want to consider bitters (dandelion leaf/root) to boost your digestive fire so that you can increase the nutrients that you are digesting and then absorbing. Here is a nice summary to get you started: http://www.herbs2000.com/disorders/ulcers_stomach.htm


and more thoughts on chores... we never called them chores. they are responsibilities. the other side is that one also has privileges.


aweyn: also look for attenborough's "Sexual Encounters of the Floral Kind" -- THAT is the movie we used to use. i found at least some parts on youtube.
post #632 of 652
5th Sacred Thing- the Melissa was a sort of bee focused society (and the name for each member of the society). The idea is that the book is set in a near/far future in which a lot has changed. Resources are very limited, and some populations don't have access to much in the way or medicine/food/technology. At the same time, there is a great deal more magic and functional magic (computers that store data using crystals that talk to those with certain gifts, etc). Anyway, the Melissas are women who have essentially submersed themselves in the bee collective/hive society. They provide services to the bees as well as to the scattered human populations. Kind of like, oh, bee shamans? They are no longer fully human... they're a sort of bridge, able to call bees, speak with them, create nectars that allow communication between the species or that treat specific illnesses. Stuff like that. One of the primary characters in the book becomes an "almost" Melissa... she is given gifts by the Melissas but keeps her humanity intact so that she can travel/remain active in the human world.

Travel- yeah, it's two seperate issues... my MIL gave us this "cycle" of her time share. It's a full week, studio apt, in a sort of summer vacation town. But the "cycle" is in November sooooo.... most things are closed. It should be a nice, quiet, relaxing break from normal life. Except we weren't expecting it, we have to leave next week, we have no money to pay for travel stuff (like gas to get there/back... it's an 8 hour drive... or food once we're there, especially since we have to stay gluten free for Laia so no eating out/fast food). We also don't have anyone here who can take care of the cat or the chickens, and no money to hire a one week farm hand. DH scrambled to get the week off and honestly, I just don't want to go. If we have a week off I want to spend it here, getting stuff done! It also annoys me that he found a way to accept this week vacation gift but never takes time off when I ask him... Pennsic was our first vacation of more than a long weekend in nearly 5 years.

And then there is the other element. DH thought maybe I'd want to stay here at the house while he took the three kiddos for the week. Torin is 14mo and nurses a lot (8-9 times a day and then all night long), he's never been away from me for more than a few hours. I can't imagine sending him away for a WHOLE WEEK. One, I'd probably get mastitis again and two... dear gods, I can't imagine anyone thinking that seperating a nursing 14mo from his mama for a week would be relaxing/healthy for anyone involved. It's one thing if you have to, but just "because"? And given that DH has been so scattered recently and Tor has taken the brunt of that (the scalding tea, the kitchen knife, a massive bleeding head bump the DH didn't notice, diapers unchanged for hours, etc), and Ro pushes DH's button with amazing skill leading to her melting down and him losing his temper in spectacular ways? I'd spend any time apart absolutely terrified that something would happen.

He felt like a week without the kiddos would be relaxing for me, and help me de-stress. I told him the only way it would work would be if we had rooms in the same hotel... I'd spend the day sleeping and eating room service and watching tv and he could bring the kids in to hug/nurse every few hours. Especially since I HATE being alone in this house. I completely freak out, turn on all the lights, and can't sleep at all. So even if the kiddos were all older and ok with mom being absent (keeping in mind that the only time I've been away from the kiddos over night was during birth, and even then they came to visit in the hospital during the days)... I wouldn't be ok unless I was someplace I enjoyed... like a busy hotel with lots of stuff going on at all hours, or a spa where it's calm and meditative but still filled with people. Alone in a cabin in the woods with the snow coming on? Not so much.

I have no problem being told I need a break... heck, I've been asking for a break for a while! So I can (intellectually) see how DH had this brainstorm. It makes total sense. He really thought that this out of the blue gift from his mom would be the perfect time to get the kids out of my hair for a bit while providing cat/chicken care at the same time. He just didn't think it through. And he really didn't expect me to collapse in a puddle of tears! We just need to figure something else out. When I was fighting through PPD/PTSD after the birth of dd1 breastfeeding was the only thing that kept me going. Breastfeeding (despite the thrush and mastitis this time round) is kind of the only thing I feel like I "do well" in terms of being a good mother. Sure... I craft with the kiddos, and make meals, and all that... but breastfeeding has been rocky but do-able. No questions asked. I can do it, I do do it, it's good for everyone, I rock! So to be told "forget it, we'll just wean Torin because you're stressed"... it felt like I was being told "give up the easy stuff and just relax with the hard stuff you have left". Not what he wanted to say of course, but that's how I heard/felt it, you know?

Sigh... we'll figure something out. We always do! And sorry to be a Saturday downer. There must be something in the air!
post #633 of 652


Fly by

post #634 of 652
thanks for all the tips etc. Yeah, I had to get on DH about emptying out the vacuum, outside, every time. And we've taped a flea collar onside the canister.
But more adventures ensue as DH accidentally threw out the vacuum filter and we can't find a new one around here. Looks like we need to order and rush ship it-still means not being able to vacuum for a few days, just what we needed.
We are looking for a non-toxic service, I am done messing around. I found another one on one of my boobs this morning. Yesterday I narrowly avoided a panic attack about the whole mess. I've seen them twice on DD, many times on myself, and DH, DS and I have bites(DH's are the worst, bugs seem to love him).

Maia-thanks for the tip about switching. Unfortunately I called our vet a few days ago and they told me to reapply Frontline, which seems to not have worked, and now we'll have to wait a few weeks before trying something else.

BLAH BLAH POOP POOP POOP!! NOT the way to start the new year and the new baby!!
post #635 of 652
wombatclay . Do you think you could get DH to stay home and accomplish projects for the week that he took off work? I wouldn't be worried about hurting MIL's feelings by declining the week. If she questions it, just tell her what you told us. I think a momma being stressed about what her littles are doing would be way worse than just staying home for a week with DH available to help. I hear you about the night time stress too. I lock the doors, check them, and then lock my bedroom door just to be safe, and I still toss and turn all night.
post #636 of 652
clay: i so get where you are coming from. although no one has yet ever offered us a week away people have suggested i wean when i am stressed, OR offer to take my big kids and leave me with not just a baby but a toddler. lol like that doesn't help! i need the big ones here to get me water and stuff. i think, like you said, your dh's heart was in the right place... i just don't think men sometimes get it. that is something my husband would do, and not get why i was a complete mess afterwards.


aweyn: I would so LOVE that.

well i got my hairs cut. nothing fancy. just had them cut off about 8-10 inches so my hair is just above my shoulders. i was going to do bangs, but i wasn't sure so i didn't. lol i can always do that at home. now i am toying with coloring my hair. i like it when it is reddish, so maybe...

h
post #637 of 652
Quote:
Originally Posted by wombatclay View Post
I cried for an hour or two and am still a mess. Swollen eyes, stomach upset, headache, the works. It was something dumb, and dh had actually meant it as a suggestion that might make my life easier but dang... it was just about the worst thing to say, and kind of the worste moment. It just shook me to my core and crumble bumble mushy melt.
Aww, Clay

Quote:
Originally Posted by aweynsayl View Post
ok, so, do i have to go read 5th sacred thing, or can someone just say something about it?
Read it. It's a good read all the way 'round! And the sequel (prequel) Walking to Mercury. What Clay said, it's not the whole theme of the book; it's just a part of it, but a really powerful, cool part.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wombatclay View Post
And sorry to be a Saturday downer. There must be something in the air!
You're not. Clay, we all need friends to dump and vent on. That's what we're here for, mama! You have more on your plate than the rest of us put together, and you handle it all with grace and dignity. It's actually about time you fizzled, and it sounds like you needed a good cry Hang in there, OK? We all love you

M struggled tonight for a time, but he found tools and used them and he's sober
Day at a time, right?
post #638 of 652
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewMoonMum View Post
Maia-thanks for the tip about switching. Unfortunately I called our vet a few days ago and they told me to reapply Frontline, which seems to not have worked, and now we'll have to wait a few weeks before trying something else.
Oh--- I didn't even think about stuff you apply TO the pet. We didn't have a pet at the time. We were taking care of someone else's cat (she was temporarily homeless), and I hated that cat, so I made it stay outside all the time.
There were woods behind our cabin and we got WAY, way infested with fleas. Tiny vacation cabin that we lived in off-season. One room and one bedroom and one bathroom, and wood floors, and we had so many fleas that the vet told me I'd better do something and soon, or I'd be hospitalized, for all the flea bites I had.
We bombed, we sprayed, we did everything we could think of, and still we had fleas. It took weeks and a ton of money,and lots of benadryl for me, before they got gone. It was horrible.
post #639 of 652
Fleas-We sprinkled dried mint on everything and let it sit overnight and vaccumed it up the next day. (Plus adding garlic to the dogs diet)
We use a natural spray that has neem (sp?) oil in it. So far so good. These might help.
post #640 of 652
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by aweynsayl View Post
cari, HUZZAH!!!!
Ty I have another random update too.. and it's something GOOD so I have to share! We were hanging out at MIL's today after the kids swim lesson and she told us after christmas she is replacing their mattress with a memory foam jobby... and offered us their current mattress, which is only a couple of years old (and very $$$ so excellent quality). SO we do not have to stress about saving the money to buy another one

Quote:
i need toilet help, my cunning home-wise ladies-- ours get disgusting within a day of cleaning them! i cant find a "problem" plumbing wise, so i guess it's just gross....
Ew The one the men/body use, is just atrocious here. I had to have daim take the whole seat off and scrub it in a tea tree oil solution to get rid of the ICK! I'm going to have him do that monthly, and hopefully combined with my regular wiping things down routine will keep it decent. Our big problem? The heat here causes the water in the traps of the plumbing to EVAPORATE... you will walk into the bathrooms and be hit in the face with sewer gas smell Cue water wastage... ALL taps ON to fill those suckers up

Quote:
i need more time for all i need to get done! gak! we went apple picking yesterday-- my first time picking grannie smiths, and i have to say, i think it's my new favorite picking experience. there was something *extra magical* about them, and i was of course, thinking of all my fellow avalon-lovers..... !
Lovely

Quote:
Originally Posted by Valérie.Qc View Post


Fly by

Hey hun, hope you are well!

I spent my Beltaine visiting family, the hitting the garden centre and picking up some seedlings (bok choi, cucumber, sugar snap peas, watermelon and rockmelon/cantaloupe) and planting them out in the veggie patch Then I had a GLORIOUS nap
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