Can a 17mo make the connection...

[AFWife]

I posted in Nighttime Parenting as well...

We've been having issues with bedtime lately. The other thread goes into it in detail.

Right now, DH is gone when we wake up and only home for a few hours before DS has to go to bed at night. We've tried getting up and seeing DH off...but damage control (tantrums like crazy) can last for HOURS after he leaves.

My question is this: Is DS old enough to make the connection between sleep and waking up to no Daddy? We have trouble with naps on the weekend (when DH is here!) and it's making us wonder...

(Last night DS was babbling and when I said, "Baby, it's time to sleep" he said "somethingsomethingsomething Daddy somethingsomething." So, I wonder if he was trying to explain that he doesn't like to sleep because Daddy always leaves...)

[claras_mom]

Yeah, I think a child that age can make the connection.

[physmom]

Definitely! As long as I can remember we've had sleep problems when DH goes away on business trips. Weekends are always hard too because DD wants to be awake as much as possible to spend time with DH (in that case she actually wants to take naps because then she sleeps less hours total).

Also the day after DH leaves on business trips it's impossible to get her to sleep that night and she'll keep asking for him.

I wish I had some good advice on how to deal with it but we haven't found anything that works.

[CrunchyChristianMama]

Absolutely. My DH comes home for lunch a few days a week and puts DD down for her nap. Since she was around that age she would ask about DH coming home when I would say it was nap time and want him to still be there when she woke up.

My DH started telling her that he would be gone when she woke up, but that he would come back home later that day. She started to catch on and not be so upset about it.

[Marissamom]

yep, my 16 month old know that if dada isn't home the garage door opening means he's getting home. she also checks to see if he's home every morning when she gets up. him being gone isn't as big of a deal for her though, because he gets home from class 1-2 hours after she gets up, then he's home with her while I go to work.