Anyone else planing a Unassisted Birth? - Page 3

[Tumble Bumbles]

Occiput Posterior position, I'm assuming she meant.

[weliveintheforest]

Occiput posterior still has the back of the head presenting. A better term for forehead presenting is 'brow' presentation. I cant find a good link, but you can google 'brow presentation' and there will be some images. It's when the baby's head is not tucked down, and that makes the diameter of the head a lot bigger than when the crown of the head is coming first.

[mama_daba]

i keep pondering doing this unassisted i doubt i will but i have so much anxiety about how the midwife was last time and i am so worried this midwife will be the same. i will have to wait and see. i have yet to meet the midwife just talked to her through email. i will wait and see what happens i guess.

[Mamatoabunch]

Originally Posted by mama_daba 

i keep pondering doing this unassisted i doubt i will but i have so much anxiety about how the midwife was last time and i am so worried this midwife will be the same. i will have to wait and see. i have yet to meet the midwife just talked to her through email. i will wait and see what happens i guess.

What do you mean mama about how the midwife was?

[mama_daba]

Originally Posted by Mamatoabunch 

What do you mean mama about how the midwife was?

she was just bossy and mean and misinformed.

[junebug2011]

My fiance and I are talking about doing a UC. Still getting prenatal care with midwives, which I really love. I have worked as a nurse and midwife's assistant so long I could do my own prenatal care, but I love the ritual of going to the office, etc.

My thing is, I have worked with lots of different midwives in labor, lovely midwives, and no matter how graceful or artful their care is, there is still some element of "I am the expert". Even if its to say, oh, I approve of how you're laboring! You're doing such a great job! If I had not had the experiences I had seeing so many other mothers give birth, I might have needed or desired that kind of support during labor. As it is, I feel like I would get the most strength and power being on my own. I don't want to be nurtured, I just want to go on that difficult dark journey on my own, and face my demons, and work through them. I feel like the labor is an essential piece of my partner and I learning how to be parents, and I want to empower my him by letting him use his instincts to help me have the baby. I feel like it would be a totally different experience if a midwife was standing over his shoulder telling him what to do.

My question is, how do you handle the situation? I would still like a midwife's care like I said during the prenatal period. I would still love a midwife to come soon after the birth to check us out, check me for tears, and help us get settled in. Are there midwives out there who would be comfortable with that arrangement? I can't imagine they would be. In that case, do you hire a midwife and then just not call until after the birth? I would still pay her of course. Is that disrespectful? Really confused.

[Mamatoabunch]

Originally Posted by junebug2011 

My fiance and I are talking about doing a UC. Still getting prenatal care with midwives, which I really love. I have worked as a nurse and midwife's assistant so long I could do my own prenatal care, but I love the ritual of going to the office, etc.

My thing is, I have worked with lots of different midwives in labor, lovely midwives, and no matter how graceful or artful their care is, there is still some element of "I am the expert". Even if its to say, oh, I approve of how you're laboring! You're doing such a great job! If I had not had the experiences I had seeing so many other mothers give birth, I might have needed or desired that kind of support during labor. As it is, I feel like I would get the most strength and power being on my own. I don't want to be nurtured, I just want to go on that difficult dark journey on my own, and face my demons, and work through them. I feel like the labor is an essential piece of my partner and I learning how to be parents, and I want to empower my him by letting him use his instincts to help me have the baby. I feel like it would be a totally different experience if a midwife was standing over his shoulder telling him what to do.

My question is, how do you handle the situation? I would still like a midwife's care like I said during the prenatal period. I would still love a midwife to come soon after the birth to check us out, check me for tears, and help us get settled in. Are there midwives out there who would be comfortable with that arrangement? I can't imagine they would be. In that case, do you hire a midwife and then just not call until after the birth? I would still pay her of course. Is that disrespectful? Really confused.

I agree w/ much of what you said. I actually like the ritual of prenatal care if it is w/ a low key midwife, but I don't feel a need at all any more. I do not feel it is disrespectful to call the midwife after and say we had a quickie and were surprised baby arrived w/o having time to call you.

[kawa kamuri]

We're seriously considering a birth only attended by us. Currently researching and quelling fears  I'm pretty capable and did tons of ready prior to my #4 but If any of you have some great resources to share I'm always eager for more. 

[Mamatoabunch]

Originally Posted by kawa kamuri 

We're seriously considering a birth only attended by us. Currently researching and quelling fears  I'm pretty capable and did tons of ready prior to my #4 but If any of you have some great resources to share I'm always eager for more. 

I'v have a bunch, but will have to get to it tomorrow. 

[kawa kamuri]

Originally Posted by Mamatoabunch 
I'v have a bunch, but will have to get to it tomorrow. 

Thank you!

Here are some of mine:

http://midwifethinking.com/2010/12/03/shoulder-dystocia-the-real-story/

http://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/nuchlcrd.html

http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/252628/unassisted-birth-resources

http://www.unhinderedliving.com/variations.html

http://www.umbrellanoize.com/stuff/Emergency%20Childbirth.pdf

Emergency Childbirth is apparently the most fascinating book in my collection because my kids have maimed it over the years 
 

[weliveintheforest]

Originally Posted by junebug2011 

My question is, how do you handle the situation? I would still like a midwife's care like I said during the prenatal period. I would still love a midwife to come soon after the birth to check us out, check me for tears, and help us get settled in. Are there midwives out there who would be comfortable with that arrangement? I can't imagine they would be. In that case, do you hire a midwife and then just not call until after the birth? I would still pay her of course. Is that disrespectful? Really confused.

I think it depends on the midwife.  If you are still planning to pay her I think it's okay.  We considered doing that with a registered midwife last time but didn't.  The two main reasons were 1) it would make her look bad and 2) I would have felt really uncomfortable being dishonest about my plans.  #1 may not be an issue for you, but where we were living it would not have been great for her.

[Mamatoabunch]

Originally Posted by kawa kamuri 

Originally Posted by Mamatoabunch 
I'v have a bunch, but will have to get to it tomorrow. 

Thank you!

Here are some of mine:

http://midwifethinking.com/2010/12/03/shoulder-dystocia-the-real-story/

http://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/nuchlcrd.html

http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/252628/unassisted-birth-resources

http://www.unhinderedliving.com/variations.html

http://www.umbrellanoize.com/stuff/Emergency%20Childbirth.pdf

Emergency Childbirth is apparently the most fascinating book in my collection because my kids have maimed it over the years 
 

http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/

http://www.christianuc.com/uc/faqs.php

http://community.livejournal.com/unassistedbirth

http://www.amazon.com/Unassisted-Childbirth-Laura-Kaplan-Shanley/dp/0897893778

http://www.amazon.com/Unassisted-Homebirth-Lynn-M-Griesemer/dp/0966106601/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1291908511&sr=1-1

http://www.amazon.com/Heart-Hands-Midwifes-Guide-Pregnancy/dp/1587612216/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1291908550&sr=1-1

http://www.amazon.com/Spiritual-Midwifery-Ina-May-Gaskin/dp/1570671044/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1291908582&sr=1-2

http://www.birthjunkie.com/homebirth/

http://forums.ivillage.com/t5/Unassisted-Childbirth/ct-p/iv-ppunassisted

http://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/

[kawa kamuri]

Thanks for those links! That was so sweet of you to take the time 

[jshannyn519]

I went from planning a mw attended hospital birth to being on the fence about UC to being sure that UC is the option for me and this little bunny. The mws I'm seeing are CNMs and don't do HB, which doesn't bother me at all because I don't want anyone there, except maybe one of my best friends who is a super cool chick and very supportive. Every time I envision myself giving birth, it's in this corner of my bedroom, between the side of my bed and the closet door, with the light from the closet being the only illumination. It feels like it's late at night/early in the morning and it's just me and the baby working together in birth. Once I jumped all the way into the UC camp, my fears and anxieties pretty much vanished. Initially I was concerned about breech or weird presentation, but I have an entire library of midwifery texts and I've learned how to reposition a mama so that a different presentation isn't as much of an issue.

I totally plan on calling my MW group after baby is born and telling them that it went really fast at home, everyone is fine, and I'd like to come in to the office to get checked. I'll do the same thing with our pediatrician.

[Mamatoabunch]

Originally Posted by jshannyn519 

I totally plan on calling my MW group after baby is born and telling them that it went really fast at home, everyone is fine, and I'd like to come in to the office to get checked. I'll do the same thing with our pediatrician.

Just out of curiosity what do you want them to check? Are you planning on going in right away? 

[tracymom1]

Can someone enlighten me about the Laura Kaplan Shanley book?  Does it cover the 'nuts and bolts' of UC, like positions of the baby, what to be on the lookout for as far as emergent or unusual situations, etc... or is it just a personal account?  I plan on ordering it but just wanted to know a little more about it.  I think I will get the emergency handbook, too.  I still have my peds/neo-nate textbook from nursing school which has a lot of great info in it but is a little hospital-technical.  I signed DH up for an infant CPR class (I have a recent PALS cert) and he has been reading some online stuff about UC, too.

I spoke with my DEM from last time around today and she was just wonderful - the voice of reason I needed to hear.  She has total confidence in DH and I and she thinks that UC is the way for us to go.  She also said that, even if we change our minds at the last minute, we should feel free to give her a call and she will help us if we start to panic (which I know we won't!!).  I am feeling lighter and more comfortable as the moments pass... I believe this truly is the right decision for our family 

ETA: Kawa and Annabelle - thank you so much for the awesome links!!

[jshannyn519]

Originally Posted by Mamatoabunch 

Originally Posted by jshannyn519 

I totally plan on calling my MW group after baby is born and telling them that it went really fast at home, everyone is fine, and I'd like to come in to the office to get checked. I'll do the same thing with our pediatrician.

Just out of curiosity what do you want them to check? Are you planning on going in right away? 

I don't really want them to check anything, or feel like I need it for that matter. I know my body well enough to know if something is wrong or off. However, since I have insurance I'm sure that they'll need some kind of documentation from my MWs that baby was born and all that jazz in order to pay for the prenatal care claims. I don't plan on going in right away either unless there is an issue for myself with bleeding or something, which I don't foresee.

As far as taking baby in right away, that won't happen either. I have a stethoscope, baby BP cuff, thermometer, etc so I can do baby vitals myself. I got some newborn chart paperwork from a MW supply company so I can document everything. Considering that I do vitals on people all the time and I know how to do newborn assessments, I've got that covered. :)  I don't plan on doing any vaccines right away either, so there's really no point in going into the ped super early.

[Mamatoabunch]

Originally Posted by jshannyn519 

I don't really want them to check anything, or feel like I need it for that matter. I know my body well enough to know if something is wrong or off. However, since I have insurance I'm sure that they'll need some kind of documentation from my MWs that baby was born and all that jazz in order to pay for the prenatal care claims. I don't plan on going in right away either unless there is an issue for myself with bleeding or something, which I don't foresee.

As far as taking baby in right away, that won't happen either. I have a stethoscope, baby BP cuff, thermometer, etc so I can do baby vitals myself. I got some newborn chart paperwork from a MW supply company so I can document everything. Considering that I do vitals on people all the time and I know how to do newborn assessments, I've got that covered. :)  I don't plan on doing any vaccines right away either, so there's really no point in going into the ped super early.

I was just totally curious. I enjoy speaking "UC" and learning about how each mama finds just their right path for them. I never thought of writing down anything assessment wise for baby, interesting idea. I feel so comfy here in NM and my ped, in fact Finnian has actually never seen anyone, our ped included. We rarely go in. We hope to be moved before this new wee one arrives and I will be in a unfamiliar state so I might write down some of the newborn stuff. 
 

[Mamatoabunch]

Originally Posted by tracymom1 

Can someone enlighten me about the Laura Kaplan Shanley book?  Does it cover the 'nuts and bolts' of UC, like positions of the baby, what to be on the lookout for as far as emergent or unusual situations, etc... or is it just a personal account?  I plan on ordering it but just wanted to know a little more about it.  I think I will get the emergency handbook, too.  I still have my peds/neo-nate textbook from nursing school which has a lot of great info in it but is a little hospital-technical.  I signed DH up for an infant CPR class (I have a recent PALS cert) and he has been reading some online stuff about UC, too.

I spoke with my DEM from last time around today and she was just wonderful - the voice of reason I needed to hear.  She has total confidence in DH and I and she thinks that UC is the way for us to go.  She also said that, even if we change our minds at the last minute, we should feel free to give her a call and she will help us if we start to panic (which I know we won't!!).  I am feeling lighter and more comfortable as the moments pass... I believe this truly is the right decision for our family 

ETA: Kawa and Annabelle - thank you so much for the awesome links!!

Laura's book is a personal account, bot nuts and bolts. I like Heart and Hands for a hands on book and the midwives archives for research. I use the midwives archives for than anything. Attending an infant CPR class is an excellent thing to have regardless, but infant CPR is not quite the same as infant resuscitation. 

Here is a link helping to describe the difference. It is slight, but needs to be noted.

http://www.health.state.ny.us/nysdoh/ems/pdf/ho7newborncpr.pdf

[jshannyn519]

Originally Posted by Mamatoabunch 

I was just totally curious. I enjoy speaking "UC" and learning about how each mama finds just their right path for them. I never thought of writing down anything assessment wise for baby, interesting idea. I feel so comfy here in NM and my ped, in fact Finnian has actually never seen anyone, our ped included. We rarely go in. We hope to be moved before this new wee one arrives and I will be in a unfamiliar state so I might write down some of the newborn stuff. 

It's interesting to me to hear how different people handle their pregnancies and births too. Particularly since I plan on being a CNM later in life, I like to get a fuller picture of the various options and preferences. I love to document stuff. I'm not sure if it comes from my slightly neurotic need to plan everything, my nursing school training, or even my awful divorce (where I had to document every little tiny encounter) but I really like keeping records of things. Even if the ped never sees it, I'll have it for my records and the baby book. I also got a few labor flow charts as well. I may not ever use them, but knowing that I have a place to document things should I feel the need helps me feel more secure somehow. I got the paperwork from Cascade Healthcare Products, www.1cascade.com, along with some other birth supplies that I'll need.

My son goes to the ped about every 6 months for med checks, but my daughter hasn't been in for a well-child visit (except for a check when she was really sick and ended up in the hospital for a week) in at least 4 years. I'm not vaxing my kids anymore, except for tetanus since they run around barefoot all the time, so there's really no need for the annual ped visits. We're in Texas and it's actually a pretty good place to be a homebirthing, no vaxing, hands off kind of mama.