Recently started EC -- how to progress from here?

[G809]

Hi, everyone!

I'm new to this community! I recently read Infant Toilet Training by Laurie Boucke and was inspired by the story about an infant EC'd from age 4 months, and fully "trained" by 10 months! My little one just recently turned 4 months and I have just started working with him on EC'ing. I have been interested in this method since his birth and have always tried to help him associate cues for pee/poop (and even caught several poops), but never really felt convinced enough about this method to really go for it full time, so to speak, until now.

I've been at it for three days, and I am now using mostly timing to catch his pees. Today, for example, I would say I caught about 5 pees and 1 poo. But frankly, I can see NO discernible signal (facial, vocal, or otherwise) to indicate a pee. He just goes a bit quiet, but by then he is already peeing and there is not enough time to take him to the toilet. I actually have a similar problem with poos! He used to grunt like a maniac but now, with occasional exceptions, just poos quite calmly/quietly, so I even miss those! Arg!

My question is: where do we go from here? How do I improve? Using timing only is tough, since sometimes it is 30 mins in between, but other times 15. He seems to get frustrated with me when I bring him to the toilet too often to check. If I keep just catching several each day, will he simply learn to wait until I bring him (is that even possible for such a small baby)? Or will he be able to signal to me soon (and at what age can a baby start to do ASL signs?)? Or how does this work?

Thanks, all! I'm feeling really excited about EC :-).

[theboysmama]

my dd gave me very few signals and we based it mostly on timeing until about 14months when she started signing.
She learned that I would take her frequently and would wait (if she choseto ) for that opportunity. I would offer and if she refused I would move on and offer later. I found it easiest to go by routine instead of the clock. For example I would always offer when:
-she first woke up
-after a diaper change
-before getting in her car seat
-just after getting out of her car seat
-if it had been a while
-if i had the fleeting thought "i should take her pee"
-if she was fussy before I would offer the breast
-after she ate
-if she was popping off and on while eating
-if she made any kind of obvious sign like grunting (which was rare in the beginning but obvious when solids started)

That pretty much covers the entire day. Have fun with it and if he doesn't go move on. If you are positive he needs to go (it has been a really long time, he is really fussy, etc.) and he refuses try a different positon, different toilet, etc. I would offer several options and sometimes she wouldn't go until the 3rd or 4th. I think she jst got the hint I wasn't giving up There is no wrong way to do this and no 2 kids/parents are alike.

[heatherr30]

He will eventually start holding pee longer and longer as his bladder gets bigger and then you'll have a better chance of getting him to the toilet before he needs to go. and when he goes it may be at predictable times, such as after a car or stroller ride when he gets up, etc. Anyway this was my experience.

[emmaegbert]

I agree with theboysmama and heatherr30. Find regular times to potty him, and then also maybe when you think he might need to go. For me a diaper back-up made this low-stress for me. I started p/t EC with my DD when she was 2mo, and she really didn't give me any signals until... when? after she was 1 I think? She is 17m now and rarely, rarely has misses. Its still a combo of timing and when its convenient (like, potty before you go out) and when she tells me.

[Harmony96]

Originally Posted by G809

I can see NO discernible signal (facial, vocal, or otherwise) to indicate a pee. He just goes a bit quiet, but by then he is already peeing...

In addition to what everyone else said, when you notice this happening, absolutely make your cue sound for him! That will help him learn, even if he happens to be going in a diaper right then. When some people are having an "off" time with EC, they will sometimes just have a day or two of nakey time and observe their baby, and make the cue sound when they are going, then get back into the groove later on.

[isabchi]

I ECed my second mostly on timing until past the first year old. He had almost none cue signs, but He cues lots in the car seat and after misses. So, we timing and say verbaly what is going on. I timing something like this:
* After wake up and nurse..
* after the first pee in the morning and naps ... 15 mins, 15 mins, 20 mins, 30 mins.. and one hour or 45 mins... when He was older, every hour.