13 mo old biting when BF - please, please advise!!

[sammymama]

Hi Mamas,

I am desperate for some advice!

My dd is 13 mo old and up to this point has been a crazy avid nurser. She noshes all night long, and usually nurses about every 3 hours during the day, especially before and after her 2 daytime naps. For about a week now she has been CHOMPING down on the tip of my nipple at the start of a session (or at least, when I try to initiate a session during one her "usual" times).

I am wondering if it has to do with her cutting molars as her sleep has been interrupted in a typical teething sort of way, she has had a bunch of drool, congestion, etc. When she cut her first teeth around 8 months she had about 5 days of biting; I hung on through that and it went away on its own, so I've been thinking I can just hang on through this but it's been days more, and is SO much more painful now that there are 8 teeth chomping down.

She has also been super scatty, like she can't settle down this past week as well. She is on the cusp of walking alone so I wonder if that is it? She had a week of crazy interrupted sleep around 9 months, right before she started crawling, but that never affected nursing.

The first time she did it I couldn't help it and yelled Ouch, but she just seemed to think it was funny, and now she will go to nip, then laugh and look up at me, smiling. I have tried saying 'no biting Mommy' and setting her down but she doesn't seem daunted.

I am upset because this is definitely affecting our nursing relationship. I know she does not mean to hurt me, but I'm scared to start a session now. I also hate putting her to sleep without nursing, but that's what it's come to several times now b/c she will not calm down to latch on (I've tried laying down with her in a dark room, the Ergo, getting my milk to let down before putting her on, etc). My boobs are engorged and hurting from all the inconsistency. I am afraid that if I "commit" to dropping a session or two during the day and then all of this turns out to just be a hump due to teething/mastering a new skill and she wants to go back to her usual nursing schedule, my supply will be gone. I had no plans (AT ALL) to wean her; since she has always been soooo happy nursing I just assumed we would go on for a long time. I am feeling very sad at the thought of weaning over this. Is it just time for the nursing schedule to evolve? She was never that into solid foods but the past few weeks have seen a marked increase in that, now that I think about it... is that just the natural course?

I would so appreciate any advice!!!!
Thank you!

[Super~Single~Mama]

My son did this too, and also thought OUCH was funny. So, I didn't react in pain, but I would put him down, and put my boob away. No nursing for 5-10MINUTES after. This was KEY, b/c if you put them down and then pick them right back up they don't see the connection to anything bad - it becomes a game.

However, if you end the nursing session COMPLETELY and go about your life saying, "No, we can't nurse when you bite. Biting hurts. Teeth are not for biting." and do something - I used to do dishes. Dishes b/c my ds hates it when I do dishes b/c I can't pay attention to him while I'm doing them (well, I can talk to him, but I can't be on the floor playing with him like he wants).

He would cry, he didn't like it at all. BUT - at MOST, 1-2weeks and he was DONE biting me at the breast. You have to be SUPER consistent with it - night time and all, but it works.

ETA - it doesn't require weaning, or dropping sessions AT ALL. Just making clear that when she bites she doesn't get to nurse. I always offered again 5-10 minutes later (unless ds was thoroughly distracted) and didn't really offer any other type of milk or food in between (I really wanted him to make the connection - but if he was nursing for true hunger there wasn't any biting until the end of the session, b/c when he's hungry he's all business).

good luck!

[mamaw/two]

IMO, a 13 month old can understand quite a bit, so keeping up with the "no biting, it hurts mommy" is a good idea. Since it sounds like your dd is looking for a little fun interaction at the start of the nursing session, maybe you could play an "open wide and stick out your tongue" type of game. You could make the funny face at her and laugh and see if she can do it to. You get the benefit of having fun and getting a good latch (my teething toddlers tend to get a lazy latch, so we really like this game in our house). If she nips just tell her it hurt, put her down and don't nurse again for a while. She will quicky associate the right way to nurse. Good luck, I hope you find something that works well for you.

[lunarlady]

Originally Posted by thyra

No nursing for 5-10MINUTES after. This was KEY, b/c if you put them down and then pick them right back up they don't see the connection to anything bad - it becomes a game.

However, if you end the nursing session COMPLETELY and go about your life saying, "No, we can't nurse when you bite. Biting hurts. Teeth are not for biting." and do something - I used to do dishes. Dishes b/c my ds hates it when I do dishes b/c I can't pay attention to him while I'm doing them (well, I can talk to him, but I can't be on the floor playing with him like he wants).

This is what I did, but when we came back to nurse I told my DD that she had to have the other side because mommy's boob had an owe where she bit it. (usually it was still sore!)so she could only have the one side now. If she bit that side too she lost that session and I would pump if needed to releive the pressure. Finally, i didn't offer all the time, and so we only did sessions when she was really interested. Good luck! It is a stage but it won't last.

[sammymama]

Thank you all so much for writing! It made me feel better that other people have gone through this and it is not an indication of a need to wean. (I got so emotional thinking about ending that part of our relationship!)

Anyway, I tried not reacting and it certainly was a challenge but I do think there is something to it, because the times after that she nipped there was no more laughing or smiling from her. I tried giving it time every time she would nip but finally she had to go down for her afternoon nap and then later bed and we still hadn't successfully latched on, so I put her to sleep in a different sling both times and when she was almost asleep I popped the boob in and she just went off to dreamland like she does when we all go to bed at night. I did that all day today as well, and then tonight for some reason there was no biting and she latched on as usual!!! I nearly cried with relief, lol.

My husband and I both noted yesterday and today that she is just generally seeming really distracted right now, scatty, and especially impatient! She is just on the cusp of walking, so I'm really hoping we can attribute all of this to that, not a true nursing problem.

So things seem to be looking up... I will keep you posted, and thank you again for taking the time to offer your suggestions and shared experience. It kept me going!!

[Super~Single~Mama]

Nope, doesn't sound like a nursing problem - probably just teething and lots of milestones in the works.

I'm glad things are getting better - the sling strategy worked for us for naps when ds was in a really bad biting phase.