3rd week bottle advice needed?!

[sssheri]

We have a wedding of a very close friend in 2 weeks. Our babe will be exactly 3 weeks old. My inlaws will be in town from across the country for 2 nights and will babysit for us. I don't want to introduce a bottle just yet, but was wondering if it will be ok to do it for just a few times so that we can go to the wedding and my inlaws can feed her.

Anyone have any advice or suggestions for how to do this? I was thinking of having dh try it a few days before, maybe once a day for a small feeding. And then on the night, have my inlaws feed her from the bottle about every hour so that she is eating lots of small meals throughout the night and doesn't get super hungry. Then we will probably wait a week before starting to actually introduce a bottle.

Any tips or tricks would be greatly appreciated!

[madcap150]

Is it a foregone conclusion that the baby can't come to the wedding with you? If so, how long will you be gone, and will you be able to pump or hand express during that time?

I ask because your babe is so small that you are still establishing your supply. Some moms won't have any supply problems if they go for multiple hours without breastfeeding, but some will, and you won't know which you are until afterwards. Plus you might get really engorged and uncomfortable!

If your baby stays with your in-laws while you are at the wedding, you might consider having them use an alternate feeding method since you don't want to introduce a bottle just yet. You could try cup feeding, dropper feeding, etc. Here is the kellymom page discussing alternate feeding methods. They tend to be more time-consuming than bottle-feeding, so day care providers may not have the time for them, but they are great for doting grandparents.

If you decide that you want to give her a bottle, look at the kellymom tips for bottlefeeding a breastfed baby to help minimize the risks of giving a bottle.

[lunarlady]

If it were me, I would skip the bottle by topping baby off right before the wedding, then have the in-laws bring baby to you when baby gets hungry. Feed, then give baby back and go back to the party! It helps if they can hangout nearby at a park or coffee shop.

If that isn't an option, I would let the in-laws do the first bottle. If baby gets hungry enough, she will eat. Just let them know this is a new thing so they will not be surprised if she fights it. Having a bottle or two before isn't really going to change things much, and just means more pumping for you and more stress for DH.

[sssheri]

Thanks for the advice. We'll be away for about 6-8 hours. The wedding is an hour away in the middle of nowhere. I might take her with me, but am still getting comfortable with her outside the house. If I don't, I will pump to keep up supply and not get engorged. I will look at the alternate feeding methods and discuss with dh and mil. Thanks again!

[Ellien C]

Much is made about nipple confusion (or flow preference as we call it now). I will tell you my story. I returned to work with both of my children when they were 12 weeks old and they both successfully switched between bottle and breast with no problem. My daughter was weaned at 4.5 (at my preference, she would have continued) and my son is 6 months and nurses like a champ.

With both of them I introduced the bottle at 3-4 weeks and gave a bottle twice a week until they went to day care and then they got 3-4 per day. For us, my supply was fine and the bottle didn't make any difference at all.

If the baby will take it, I don't think you'll have a problem. Many babies successfully take bottles at 3-4 weeks. I've seen working mom's have to work harder at it once the baby is 9-12 weeks. For my own peace of mind, I'd want to know that the baby could take a bottle before I left. For our first bottle feedings, I pumped and had DH give the warm, fresh BM in the bottle. Then once I knew he would take it, we used refrigerated or frozen milk.

Having said all that though, it might be nice if you can bring the baby with you.

[TheGirls]

Honestly at that age for that length of time I'd bring the baby with me if at all possible. If you don't, you'll need to pump, probably twice, while at the wedding. While nursing can be done in anywhere there's a chair (use a cover if you are uncomfortable) pumping really requires somewhere private, possibly with an outlet. I'd focus on getting comfortable with nursing in public and finding a nursing-appropriate outfit for yourself, personally. Then work up to leaving her with others more slowly. I don't generally have a problem with leaving babies with grandma or a sitter, and my DD never had a problem with nipple confusion, but 6-8 hours at only 3 weeks would be outside of my comfort zone, and I'd have a hard time relaxing or enjoying myself. Especially if I had to keep hunting down places to pump.

[Llyra]

Originally Posted by Ellien C

Much is made about nipple confusion (or flow preference as we call it now).

Nipple confusion is a difficult issue. Not all babies are subject to it-- many, many babies go back and forth between breast and bottle, and never have a problem. So much so, that a lot of mamas will declare there's no such thing as nipple confusion. But you can't tell which kids are subject to it until it happens, and once it happens it can be extremely difficult to overcome. My DD1 started refusing the breast after only one bottle, and never nursed again. She was only a few weeks old. (Granted, had I known then what I do now, we would have been more persistent in reteaching her.)

My DS was given one bottle at a few hours old, and it took him three weeks to learn to latch on. Not to have a good latch-- to latch on AT ALL. He was tube fed for three weeks while we worked with a lactation consultant to retrain him to suckle at the breast. He was not low birthweight, BTW-- he was a 37-weeker, and close to 7 pounds.

Then again, my DD2 started bottles at about four weeks old, and continued to have one a day for her whole first year, and never had any trouble with breastfeeding at all.

So it's hard to say. Myself, I wouldn't risk it, not at three weeks old. I've been there, twice, and I know how hard it can be to get a baby back on the breast. If I was really set on leaving baby for the evening, I would teach the caregiver an alternate feeding method-- a syringe or medicine dropper, or an SNS tube taped to a finger. Three weeks is still really early to be away for so long-- that's outside my comfort zone.

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[ShwarmaQueen]

I HAD to pump and have my mom feed DD for a few hours when she was 3 wks old due to my one and only migraine (c/s- epidural delivery) I've ever had. It did not cause a problem with her latch, and from then on she switched back and forth with no problems.

If you can take the baby with you (Moby wraps are awesome for tiny babies!) that would be the best solution. She would probably sleep for most, or even the entire time.

[crystal_buffaloe]

I vote take her with you! Do you have a moby wrap or other sling/carrier?

And of course you're still getting used to having her out; she's only 1 week old You'll be loads and loads more confident in 2 weeks.

I started pumping at 4 weeks and we introduced a bottle just a little after that, once about every other day, to prep for me going back to work.