Am I spoiling him?

[nicholeraine]

Alright so I feel conflicted.. I started weaning my son at 18 months. He's 19 months next week and I realized recently that I am just not ready to wean him. This coming after a month of only nursing him 3 times a day as compared to nursing on demand..

So I'm back to nursing on demand while we're at home, but when we go out to visit family it's still only 3 times a day. My family would say that I'm spoiling and teaching him he can get whatever he wants.. but I think nursing is just such a personal thing that they really have no idea.. I am not ready. It took a month of "weaning" to realize this.

So am I somehow spoiling him, or what?

[mamaw/two]

No, you are meeting his needs . Our society puts to much emphasis on early independence, IMHO. You are doing a great job, just do what feels right and don't worry about what others say.

PS - I have no idea how the Canadian flag got on my post? My 16 month old ds hit the keyboard with his foot...

[tabrizia]

You are meeting his and your needs, that isn't spoiling. Really nursing a child or toddler even on demand, isn't spoiling it is offering comfort and something they need. Just because American culture says you need to wean by 12 months doesn't mean it is actually true.

Honestly at 19 months if you don't want to get into it with family you can just not nurse while around them, DD goes all day without nursing some days, and we tend to not nurse when out, though I nurse on demand at home. That being said, my family and DH's family doesn't actually have a huge problem with me nursing my 18 month old. They have had plenty of previous exposure considering I am just weaning my 3.5 year old now.

[isabchi]

Like mamaw/two said, you just meeting his needs. The age of natural weaning around the world is somewhere 3.5 and 4.5 years old.

I like this article, thet maybe can help to validate you own insticts
http://www.parentdish.com/2010/09/28..._lnk3%7C173917

Enjoy you breastfeeding time with your little one, the time pass so fast. He's going to be a grown man in no time, and of course he's no going to nurse the day before to go college...LOL!

Seriously, I have to very independent kiddos (2 and 5 yo). They both still nursing, but almost nobody see them nursing. They're super busy learning and playing. Some times I make jokes about they just remember they have a mother when they ask for food, nurse and cuddle to sleep. Sometime I missed the time when They need me all the time, and was carried them around the clock.

[ShanaV]

Yeah, what they said! Spoiling is buying them every toy they so much as look at in the toy store, nursing is not.

[dakotablue]

Well, are you giving them everything they ask for when they ask for it? I mean I give my DH kisses when he asks, everytime he asks...

Could you be spoiling your DS, maybe. Would nursing have anything to do with that? Nope.

Providing a child with love and affection in the form of something very very good for them is not spoiling.

Now you could be doing in other areas, but I don't know anything about you.

[LionessMom]

listen....



spoiling is what happens to fruit left on the shelf too long




you are nurturing him.





i weaned DD1 at 22mo (it hurt cus i was preg). i regret it. i am exceptionally happy that she loves for me to pump for her every day. she asks for it. nurse that baby for as long as you want. your kid will be independent and happy bc you gave him what he needed when he needed it. that gives them the security to try new things.