OK, along the same lines as another thread about a 6yo not listening... I'm a bit past the part where I have enough patience to keep waiting and explaining though. Here's what happens. DS1 is 5.75, started K this year. He has a tendency to act out physically when frustrated, hungry, tired, whatever. But it's definitely worse these days, summer wasn't so bad.
So yesterday for example, he and ds2 (3.5) were playing in the living room while I'm in and out of there, doing this and that on the first floor, hearing the sometimes nice playing.. and then I hear things going downhill yet AGAIN -with ds1 being too teasy, or squooshing ds2, grabbing stuff from him, etc.) so after a few times trying to stop him I told him to just go out of the room (I send him upstairs a lot for a cool-off period of a few minutes, and he does get calm) or even outside (he loves outside, it's a good happy place for him!). He kept running around and not listening to me. I told him to get his shoes, and go outside. And when I keep trying to talk to him he started throwing things at me. So I took him his shoes and held his legs tightly so I could put them on him (he kept kicking at me) and when they were finally on I took his hand and walked him to the door and once he was going out the door he was happy to do so.
But I hate the forcing part. I try to intervene before things get out of control but he doesn't listen then, and then I can't let him keep throwing things, or hurting people (he hits and kicks me, rarely his brother) when he's so wound up and not listening), so I feel I have no choice but to take his hand and move him where I need him to go, and he often just goes limp so I'm literally dragging him. It's a terrible scene! For what it's worth, I am able to keep an even, I wouldn't say calm, but firm deadpan tone while I speak to him in these situations.
He's well fed in the afternoon, has a good snack at 3pm as soon we get home from getting him from school. He's awake too early in the morning I think, but I don't know what I can do about that - he's usually asleep by 8:30 and many days he's awake by 6am. Not quite enough but he's never been a big sleeper, and he's in bed at 7:30pm, just lies awake for a long time. I do think it's too little sleep though. Still, (as I tell him) that's not an excuse for hitting and kicking and throwing, right?
So, help. I've tried to enforce a rest time after snack when he gets home, but he and his brother want to be together, and he really resists it. So I'd basically have to force that issue too, to get him to stay in his room for a rest time....
Any suggestions for me? Any others dealing with this? There must be a better way. Thanks for reading...
So yesterday for example, he and ds2 (3.5) were playing in the living room while I'm in and out of there, doing this and that on the first floor, hearing the sometimes nice playing.. and then I hear things going downhill yet AGAIN -with ds1 being too teasy, or squooshing ds2, grabbing stuff from him, etc.) so after a few times trying to stop him I told him to just go out of the room (I send him upstairs a lot for a cool-off period of a few minutes, and he does get calm) or even outside (he loves outside, it's a good happy place for him!). He kept running around and not listening to me. I told him to get his shoes, and go outside. And when I keep trying to talk to him he started throwing things at me. So I took him his shoes and held his legs tightly so I could put them on him (he kept kicking at me) and when they were finally on I took his hand and walked him to the door and once he was going out the door he was happy to do so.
But I hate the forcing part. I try to intervene before things get out of control but he doesn't listen then, and then I can't let him keep throwing things, or hurting people (he hits and kicks me, rarely his brother) when he's so wound up and not listening), so I feel I have no choice but to take his hand and move him where I need him to go, and he often just goes limp so I'm literally dragging him. It's a terrible scene! For what it's worth, I am able to keep an even, I wouldn't say calm, but firm deadpan tone while I speak to him in these situations.
He's well fed in the afternoon, has a good snack at 3pm as soon we get home from getting him from school. He's awake too early in the morning I think, but I don't know what I can do about that - he's usually asleep by 8:30 and many days he's awake by 6am. Not quite enough but he's never been a big sleeper, and he's in bed at 7:30pm, just lies awake for a long time. I do think it's too little sleep though. Still, (as I tell him) that's not an excuse for hitting and kicking and throwing, right?
So, help. I've tried to enforce a rest time after snack when he gets home, but he and his brother want to be together, and he really resists it. So I'd basically have to force that issue too, to get him to stay in his room for a rest time....
Any suggestions for me? Any others dealing with this? There must be a better way. Thanks for reading...
I know I haven't given any suggestions for the specific behavior problem because I dont' think there's a good solution if he's all hyped up like that. Get him to run off energy or something? Really I think helping him stay out of that wild mood is the best thing, and that's likely a dietary issue.
