What you wish you knew before your baby became a toddler?

[KellyandBean]

Ok so my DD is only 7.5 mo old right now but when i was pregnant i thought i was SO ready for a baby. In reality i had NO clue. I hadn't spent any time around babies or children so becoming a parent has been a huge adjustment/learning experience. I wasn't at all mentally prepared for colic or a sleep fighter. Now that you have a toddler is there anything you wish you had done differently or had been more prepared for/read up on that would have made dealing with your toddler a little easier? What exactly is it like to be the parent of a toddler? What big challenges can i expect to face? TIA!

[AFWife]

Screaming and Violence. I never thought that my sweet, cuddly little baby would turn into a tantrum throwing nightmare when he got angry.

[physmom]

I wish I would've kept up with signing and not given up on it. At 14 months old we came back to it and DD really took off with it but I feel like we waisted so much time not communicating as well as we could've if I would've kept up with it!

Enjoy naps while they last.

Not to worry about her eating so much (she wouldn't eat solids until about 12 months old)

[dakotablue]

Silly, but I wish I had heard more about how their bodies change. DS was always a chub and now he still has chubby legs but is thinner on the body. It freaks me out, but being active changes the way their bodies are.

Also, I wish I had known (and am greatful to MDC for this) 1 year olds can out eat adults and that's ok

DS is only 1 so I bet I'll get more as he's more toddlered.

Oh and I wish someone would have warned me they can grow an inch over night which means the kitchen draw you could open with them standing underneath yesterday, isn't the best idea to open today.

[LadyCatherine185]

That things would become SO MUCH EASIER once he could communicate. Actually, around 10 months, when he started walking, my life became much easier because he was HAPPY and not fussy all the time.

For me, going from the baby stage to the toddler stage has been a big relief, and MUCH easier. DS was a hard baby, and he is a pretty easy toddler (as far as toddlers go.. ).

Babyproof. At least the main areas of the house. You can sit back and watch them explore, and maybe even run to the bathroom without them if you know there isn't anything they can get into!

We did do some signing starting around 10 months, we taught him "please" and "all finished" and those were HUGE in keeping him from whining for things. A great book to read on parenting toddlers is Happiest Toddler on the Block.

It is a little more difficult to keep him entertained if we are out to eat, or somewhere that he can't roam free, so I always remember to bring lots of toys and extra snacks. He doesn't like to sit still, and he also likes to run away from me, (and he has no fear!) so those things are challenging.. but so far being the mama of a toddler is 1000000x easier than of an infant.

[sapphire_chan]

That unless a baby walks REALLY early, as soon as they walk you get a toddler. I figured when DD started walking before 11 months that I'd have a couple months with a walking baby.

Toddlers are social, but bad with directions. So finding free play environments is good. And if you do it now you'll actually have time to meet the other parents and have conversations before the kids are toddlers.

[peainthepod]

That young toddlers are basically babies who can walk. They have little or no empathy, almost nonexistent impulse control, and when they want something they want it RIGHT NOW! It's especially hard while they're still pre-verbal, because they can't necessarily communicate their needs and the frustration can lead to epic meltdowns and tantrums. Teaching them signs is a really, really, really good idea and one I'm eternally glad we worked on ("Signing Time!" has been an awesome resource).

Oh, and mine (23 months) likes to throw things. A lot. I wish I had figured out sooner that I should only keep soft toys on the main floor, where everything that isn't bolted down or too heavy to lift is nearly certain to be tossed into the open stairwell like some kind of all-natural non-toxic painted wood Molotov cocktail...

[confustication]

Babyproofing is your friend. It is so much easier to know that they have a safe place to explore than to always worry about 'did I put xyz up high?'

The face that you said 'no' 17 times already does not mean that they won't try for it again. They DO understand that they aren't supposed to do something, but that understanding does not translate to impulse control.

Hiding in the bathroom for 10 minutes while they explore the babyproofed play area is a totally acceptable alternative to jumping out the nearest window or running naked down the street screaming in frustration. Really, I love my bathroom. I love the lock on the door even more.

There is not enough outside time to burn off all that energy on a great day. On a cold/rainy day you need gross motor activities inside to have any hope for sanity.

Routine is amazing. Sure, you may feel pretty boring and predictable, but that translates to 'safe' in toddler minds.

The power of music can not be overrated. Bad day? Put on something silly and uplifting (We are the Dinosaurs- Laurie Berkner is a favorite here yay STOMPING!) Overstimulated? Find something more soothing. Music can shape moods and activities throughout the day.

It is ok to be frustrated with your child. You don't have to beat yourself up emotionally for being tired and overwhelmed and ready to run screaming down the street naked. (In dire circumstances, reference the lock on the bathroom door comments above.)

Pick your battles. Is it really going to hurt anything if they wear that mismatched outfit to the store? Ok, so the pasta salad wasn't a hit- at least she/he is willing to eat a sandwich. They will grow up and refine both their palate and their wardrobe.

Play. If you enjoy life and your kids see that- most of the time they will follow suit. Model joy in everyday life and you will have a lot less stress.

Yes, everything takes 3x longer to clean/do with 'help'. Take the time now, it really is worth it.

[CrunchyChristianMama]

Months 12-24 can be harder than months 0-12. I had a non-sleeper, but still found them to be harder.

Find ways to include them in your day to day activities. Put a stool by the sink while you wash dishes so they can play in the bubbles, let them sit on the counter while you cook, get them child sized versions of your cleaning supplies so they can clean along side you. Toddlers love to copy your behavior and your life will be easier if you let them!

Decide now the behaviors you would like to see them exhibit as a 5 year old. Do you want them to pick up toys as soon as they are done playing with them? Then start now! Do you want them to sit in their own chair at the dinner table? Then start encouraging that now by making it fun. Obviously there are some things that they will simply develop into, but there's no harm in encouraging positive behavior and routines you want them to get into.

[calebsmommy25]

For me, being a Mama of a toddler is more challenging that than of a newborn/infant. DS was a relatively easy baby. He is a very well-behaved boy, however, is VERY ACTIVE and if he doesn't get his time outside his behavior goes down the toilet. It is an absolute must for him to get physical activity in, especially outside. Crafts, playdoh, baking, playing the house does not cut it.

Be prepared for biting, hiting and general 'violence'. In my experience and group of friends, it is worse with boys and those who have trouble communicating their desires. Even though DS is 2.5 and has a great vocab, he still uses his signs when he needs to or can't communicate something.

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

Originally Posted by peainthepod

That young toddlers are basically babies who can walk. They have little or no empathy, almost nonexistent impulse control, and when they want something they want it RIGHT NOW! It's especially hard while they're still pre-verbal, because they can't necessarily communicate their needs and the frustration can lead to epic meltdowns and tantrums. Teaching them signs is a really, really, really good idea and one I'm eternally glad we worked on ("Signing Time!" has been an awesome resource).

Oh, and mine (23 months) likes to throw things. A lot. I wish I had figured out sooner that I should only keep soft toys on the main floor, where everything that isn't bolted down or too heavy to lift is nearly certain to be tossed into the open stairwell like some kind of all-natural non-toxic painted wood Molotov cocktail...

All this, especially the bolded. And it doesnt end when they start verbalizing either. It kinda gets worse in a way, cuz they have more abilities and chances to ALMOST kill themselves if you take your eyes off them for a split second.

[carmel23]

hhmm... : I absolutely love the age 12 months through 36 months. I think it is my favorite age, and think it all gets better as they get bigger.

I love how busy toddlers are, how they do things their own way, and exert their personalities. Everything is worthy of exploration, they delight in things we take for granted.

Each day with a toddler is an adventure and a gift.

I've found my toddlers stay happy as long as they are well fed (lots of high protein snacks, no crackers or juice, but good, nutrient dense food) and well rested. Follow those 2 rules, have lots of things to explore (daily walk, not matter what the weather!) and have fun.

[Nicole730]

Tired toddlers will stumble, trip, and fall a lot more than nontired ones.

Start calling naptime either quiet time or rest time, that way when they don't nap, they still have to go relax in their bed for one hour or so. I'm really glad we did this as DS (2.5) doesn't nap about half the days, but I still get alone time. Well sort of alone time, the baby is up a lot now too.

[just_lily]

Yep to all of the above. Baby proofing is not so much about their safety as it is about your sanity. The first time they unload the entire tupperware cupboard it is cute. Maybe the second and third time too. But by the 1434387th time it gets pretty old to have to pick dog hair out of a container before you use it.

I found 12 to 18 months the hardest. My DD was an easy going baby and I enjoyed her quite a bit. But then she walked at 10 months and everything changed. I found by about 18 months I could verbally redirect her more often then not, but before then I had to physically remove her from what I didn't want her doing every single time. About a million times a day. Once we hit 18 months we have been on the upswing, and I really enjoy spending time with her now that she is over two.

I was also really surprised that the tantrums started a lot earlier than I expected. I didn't think they would happen until the "terrible 2s" and was shocked when my cute 1yo was writing on the floor screaming her head off. We actually have way less tantrums now that she can actually tell me what she wants.

[shnitzel]

I wish I had known how fun but tiring having a toddler is.
Mine needs to be interacted with and entertained most of the day so we are always up and running. I do miss the quiet relaxing moments of cuddling a baby and how easy they are to entertain. Toddlers can be very rewarding when they run up to you with kisses and you realize they have a sense of humour and share giggles with you and how amazing their discoveries about the world and what they can do and their pride in all their accomplishments. I am always amazed at my 15 month olds awareness of the world around her.
They go from being babies to toddlers so quickly you don't know what hit you. DD walked at 10.5 months and honestly it was a nightmare, I wasn't ready for a toddler and I felt in over my head, parenting completely changes when they are walking and you have to readjust whatever was working before.
And tantrums often start at 1.

[Abraisme]

Originally Posted by carmel23

hhmm... : I absolutely love the age 12 months through 36 months. I think it is my favorite age, and think it all gets better as they get bigger.

I love how busy toddlers are, how they do things their own way, and exert their personalities. Everything is worthy of exploration, they delight in things we take for granted.

Each day with a toddler is an adventure and a gift.

I've found my toddlers stay happy as long as they are well fed (lots of high protein snacks, no crackers or juice, but good, nutrient dense food) and well rested. Follow those 2 rules, have lots of things to explore (daily walk, not matter what the weather!) and have fun.

I think that it's such a sweet age when the world is still so shiny and new. My 14mo DD is unloading books from the shelf and laughing as we speak. Yes, she throws tiny tantrums (which is undoubtedly get worse), but the cute times way out-weigh the bad.